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Star Trek Transcripts: Where No Man Has Gone Before

Posted on August 7, 2023August 7, 2023 by TvMegasite Admin

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Kirk: Captain’s log, Star date 1312.4. The impossible has happened. From directly ahead, we’re picking up a recorded distress signal, the call letters of a vessel which has been missing for over two centuries. Did another Earth ship once probe out of the galaxy as we intend to do? What happened to it out there? Is this some warning they’ve left behind?

SPOCK: Your move, Captain.

KIRK: We should have intercepted by now. The Bridge said they’d call.

SPOCK: I’ll have you checkmated your next move.

KIRK: Have I ever mentioned you play a very irritating game of chess, Mister Spock?

SPOCK: Irritating? Ah, yes. One of your Earth emotions.

KIRK: Certain you don’t know what irritation is?

SPOCK: The fact one of my ancestors married a human female…

KIRK: Terrible having bad blood like that.

KELSO: Bridge to briefing lounge. Object is now within tractor beam range.

KIRK: No visual contact, Mister Kelso?

KELSO: No, sir. It’s too small to be a vessel. It only reads about one meter in diameter.

SPOCK: Not large enough even for a lifeboat.

KELSO: Small enough to bring it aboard, sir, if you want to risk it.

KIRK: Lock onto it, Mister Kelso.

SCOTT: Materializer ready, sir.

KIRK: Bring it aboard. Old-style ship recorder that could be ejected when something threatened the ship.

SPOCK: More like destroyed the ship in this case. Look at it. Burnt, pitted.

KIRK: Let’s hope its tapes are intact. We’ll feed it through Mister Spock’s computer.

SCOTT: Yes, sir. It’s begun transmitting, sir.

KIRK: Flash the Bridge. Put all decks on the alert.

MITCHELL: Hold it, Jim.

KIRK: Getting into shape?

MITCHELL: Yeah, well, I figured you weren’t on the Bridge. Kelso’s voice sounded a little nervous. Well, uh, you finish the game?

SPOCK: He played most illogically. His next move should have been the rook.

MITCHELL: You’re relieved, Mister Alden.

ALDEN: Acknowledged, Mister Mitchell.

KIRK: Screen on.

KELSO: Screen on, sir. Approaching galaxy edge, sir.

KIRK: Neutralize warp, Mister Mitchell. Hold this position.

MITCHELL: Neutralize warp, sir.

KIRK: Address intercraft.

MITCHELL: Intercraft open.

KIRK: This is the Captain speaking. The object we encountered is a ship’s disaster recorder, apparently ejected from the S.S. Valiant two hundred years ago.

SPOCK: The tapes are burnt out. Trying the memory banks.

KIRK: We hope to learn from the recorder what the Valiant was doing here and what destroyed the vessel. We’ll move out into our probe as soon as we have those answers. All decks, stand by.

MITCHELL: Department heads, sir. You wanted everybody on the Bridge before we left the galaxy. Jones.

SMITH: The name’s Smith, sir.

SULU: Astro sciences standing by, Captain.

SCOTT: Engineering division ready, as always.

PIPER: Life sciences ready, sir. This is Doctor Dehner, who joined the ship at the Aldebaran colony.

DEHNER: Psychiatry, Captain. My assignment is to study crew reaction in emergency conditions.

SPOCK: Getting something from the recorder now.

DEHNER: lf there was an emergency, I’d be interested in how that crew reacted, too.

MITCHELL: Improving the breed, Doctor? Is that your line?

DEHNER: I heard that’s more your specialty, Commander, line included.

MITCHELL: Walking freezer unit.

SPOCK: Decoding memory banks. I’ll try to interpolate. The Valiant had encountered a magnetic space storm and was being swept in this direction.

KIRK: The old impulse engines weren’t strong enough.

SPOCK: Swept past this point, about a half light year out of the galaxy, they were thrown clear, turned, and headed back into the galaxy here. I’m not getting it all… The tapes are pretty badly burned. Sounds like the ship had encountered some unknown force. Now, orders, counter orders, repeated urgent requests for information from the ship’s computer records for anything concerning ESP in human beings.

KIRK: Extrasensory perception. Doctor Dehner, how are you on ESP?

DEHNER: In tests I’ve taken, my ESP rated rather high.

KIRK: I’m asking what you know about ESP.

DEHNER: It is a fact that some people can sense future happenings, read the backs of playing cards and so on, but the esper capacity is always quite limited.

SPOCK: Severe damage. Seven crewmen dead. No, make that six. One crewman seemed to have recovered. That’s when they became interested in extrasensory perception. More than interested, almost frantic about it. No, this must be garbled. I get something about destruct. I must have read it wrong. It sounded like the captain giving an order to destroy his own ship.

KIRK: Comments?

PIPER: The only fact we have for sure is that the S.S. Valiant was destroyed.

KIRK: That’s probably the best argument to continue the probe. Other vessels will be heading out here someday and they’ll have to know what they’ll be facing. We’re leaving the galaxy, Mister Mitchell. Ahead, warp factor one.

SPOCK: Force field of some kind.

MITCHELL: We’re coming up on it fast.

SPOCK: Sensor beam on.

KELSO: Sensor beam on, sir.

SPOCK: Deflectors full intensity.

KELSO: Deflectors full intensity.

SPOCK: Deflectors say there’s something there; sensors say there isn’t. Density negative. Radiation negative. Energy negative.

KELSO: Whatever it is, contact in twelve seconds.

KIRK: Gravitation on automatic. Emergency stations. All decks on fire alert. Neutralize controls. Kelso, put it on manual. Any radiation? Anything?

SPOCK: Negative!

KIRK: Helmsmen, take us out of here. Helmsmen! Lateral power! Take damage reports.

SPOCK: Damage control reports, all stations!

CREWMAN: Gravity control switching to batteries.

DEHNER: Something hit me, like an electrical charge.

PIPER: He’s alive. Appears to be in shock.

CREWMAN: Engineering Deck Three, can you give damage report?

CREWMAN 2: Sensor beams. Full power on the deflectors.

SPOCK: Main engines are out, sir. We’re on emergency power cells. Casualties: nine dead.

CREWMAN: Gravity is down to point eight.

CREWMAN 2: All decks, this is Bridge Engineering. Due to emergency conditions…

KIRK: Gary. Gary, are you all right?

MITCHELL: I’m a little weak for some reason, Jim, but I feel all right now.

KIRK: Captain’s log, Star date 1312.9. Ship’s condition: heading back on impulse power only. Main engines burned out. The ship’s space warp ability gone. Earth bases which were only days away are now years in the distance. Our overriding question now is, what destroyed the Valiant? They lived through the barrier, just as we have. What happened to them after that?

DEHNER: Autopsy report, sir. Each case showed damage to the body’s neural circuit. An area of the brain was burned out.

KIRK: And you… are you feeling all right?

DEHNER: Yes. Mitchell, too, except for his eyes. We’re trying to find a reason for that now, and why, out of our whole crew, only certain people were affected.

SPOCK: I think we’ve found that answer, Doctor.

KIRK: You mentioned that tests show you have a high degree of extrasensory perception. So do the records of the others. Gary Mitchell has the highest esper rating of all.

DEHNER: lf you’re suggesting there’s anything dangerous…

SPOCK: Before the Valiant was destroyed, its captain was frantically searching for ESP information on his crew.

DEHNER: Espers are simply people with flashes of insight.

SPOCK: Are there not also those who seem to see through solid objects, cause fires to start spontaneously?

DEHNER: There’s nothing about it that could possibly make a person dangerous.

SPOCK: Doctor Dehner is speaking of normal ESP power.

DEHNER: Perhaps you know of another kind?

KIRK: Do we know for sure, Doctor, that there isn’t another kind?

MITCHELL: Hello, Jim. Hey, you look worried.

KIRK: I’ve been worried about you ever since that night on Deneb IV.

MITCHELL: Yeah, she was nova, that one. Not nearly as many after-effects this time, except for the eyes. They kind of stare back at me when I’m shaving.

KIRK: Do you feel any different?

MITCHELL: Well, in a way, I feel better than I’ve ever felt before in my life. Actually seems to have done me some good.

KIRK: How?

MITCHELL: Well, I’m getting a chance to read some of that longhair stuff you like. Hey man, I remember you back at the Academy. A stack of books with legs. The first thing I ever heard from an upperclassman was, “Watch out for Lieutenant Kirk. In his class, you either think or sink.”

KIRK: I wasn’t that bad, was I?

MITCHELL: If I hadn’t aimed that little blonde lab technician at you…

KIRK: You what? You planned that?

MITCHELL: Well, you wanted me to think, didn’t you? I outlined her whole campaign for her.

KIRK: I almost married her!

MITCHELL: Better be good to me. I’m getting even better ideas here.

KIRK: You? Spinoza?

MITCHELL: Once you get into him, he’s rather simple though. Childish, almost. I don’t agree with him at all.

KIRK: Go on.

MITCHELL: Hey, I’m trying to tell you I feel fine. When do I go back on duty?

KIRK: I’m going to ask Doctor Dehner to keep you under observation for a while.

MITCHELL: With almost a hundred women on board, you can do better than that, friend Captain.

KIRK: Consider it a challenge.

MITCHELL: That doesn’t seem very friendly. Didn’t I say you’d better be good to me?

SPOCK: He’s reading even faster now than just a few moments ago. Is that Gary Mitchell, the one you used to know?

KIRK: Put a twenty-four-hour watch on the Sickbay. Fullest possible range of examinations and tests.

PIPER: Perfect, perfect. I’ve never had a patient like you, Gary. Even the healthiest are generally off on some reading.

DEHNER: I know you don’t particularly like me, Mister Mitchell, but since I am assigned here, can we make the best of it?

MITCHELL: I’ve got nothing against you, Doctor.

DEHNER: Nor against the walking freezer unit?

MITCHELL: Well, I… sorry about that.

DEHNER: Women professionals do tend to overcompensate. Now let’s talk about you. How do you feel?

MITCHELL: You know, everybody– everybody seems worried that I don’t have some kind of fever or something. Maybe if we could just change these dials… Now back to normal, I think.

DEHNER: How did you do that?

MITCHELL: I’m not sure… I– I just thought of making it happen, and it does. It’s… hey, er, hey, watch this, Doc.

DEHNER: Stop it. Stop it! You were dead for almost twenty two seconds. There were no readings at all.

MITCHELL: Yeah. Oh, boy. You– you know, Doc, there have been other things, too, like going halfway through the ship’s library in hardly a day. Yeah. Oh, what’s happening to me?

DEHNER: Do you remember everything you read that quickly?

MITCHELL: Yeah.

DEHNER: On any tape?

MITCHELL: Sure. Yeah.

DEHNER: Try this one.

MITCHELL: Yeah.

DEHNER: Page three eighty seven.

MITCHELL: My love has wings. Slender, feathered things with grace in upswept curve and tapered tip. The Nightingale Woman, written by Phineas Tarbolde on the Canopius planet back in 1996. It’s funny you picked that one, Doctor.

DEHNER: Why?

MITCHELL: That’s one of the most passionate love sonnets of the past couple of centuries. How do you feel, Doctor?

DEHNER: What?

MITCHELL: How do you feel?

DEHNER: I just fell. Nothing happened.

MITCHELL No? Are you sure? Are you sure?

KELSO: Er, I was on my coffee break. I thought I’d check up on

MITCHELL Yeah, that’s okay, Lee, come on in. Don’t let the light in my eyes bother you, pal. It’s all for our– our good-looking lady doctor here.

KELSO: Yeah. Sure.

MITCHELL: So, er, so, how go the repairs?

KELSO: Well, the main engines are gone, unless we can find some way to re-energize them.

MITCHELL: You’d better check the starboard impulse packs. Those points have about decayed to lead.

KELSO: Oh, yeah, sure, Mitch.

MITCHELL: I’m not joking, Lee! You activate those packs, and you’ll blow the whole impulse deck.

KELSO: I’ll, er, I’ll get on it right away. I just wanted to stop by and make sure you were okay. See you later.

MITCHELL: He’s a fool. A fool. He’d seen those points and he hadn’t noticed their condition.

DEHNER: How do you know?

MITCHELL: The image of what he’d seen was still in his mind.

KELSO: Well, it didn’t make any sense that he’d know, but naturally, I checked out the circuit anyway. I don’t know how, but he was right. This point is burned out exactly the way he described it.

DEHNER: Sorry I’m late. I became so interested in observing Gary– Mister Mitchell.

SPOCK: Our subject is not Gary Mitchell. Our concern is, rather, what he is mutating into.

DEHNER: I know those from your planet aren’t suppose to have feelings like we do, Mister Spock, but to talk that way about a man you’ve worked next to for years is worse than–

KIRK: That’s enough, Doctor.

DEHNER: I don’t think so. I understand you least of all. Gary told me that you’ve been friends since he joined the service; that you asked for him aboard your first command.

KIRK: It is my duty, whether pleasant or unpleasant, to listen to the reports, observations, even speculations, on any subject that might affect the safety of this vessel, and it’s my science officer’s duty to see I’m provided with that. Go ahead, Mister Spock.

SPOCK: Have you noted evidence of unusual powers?

DEHNER: He can control certain autonomic reflexes. He reads very fast, retains more than most of us might consider usual.

KIRK: Mister Scott, would you repeat what you just told us?

SCOTT: About an hour ago, the Bridge controls started going crazy. Levers shifting by themselves, buttons being pushed, instrument readings changing.

SPOCK: And on my monitor screen I could see Mitchell smiling each time it happened, as if this ship and crew were almost a toy for his amusement.

KIRK: Are they right, Doctor? Has he shown abilities of such magnitude?

DEHNER: I saw some such indications.

KIRK: And you didn’t think it worth mentioning?

DEHNER: No one’s been hurt, have they? Don’t you understand? A mutated superior man could also be a wonderful thing. The forerunner of a new and better kind of human being.

KIRK: Mister Sulu.

SULU: If you want the mathematics of this, Mitchell’s ability is increasing geometrically. That is, like having a penny, doubling it every day. In a month, you’ll be a millionaire.

SPOCK: In less time than that, he will have attained powers we can’t understand and can’t cope with. Soon we’ll be not only useless to him, but actually an annoyance.

KIRK: There’ll be no discussion of this with the crew. Thank you.

SPOCK: We’ll never reach an Earth base with him aboard, Jim. You heard the mathematics of it. In a month he’ll have as much in common with us as we’d have with a ship full of white mice.

KIRK: I need a recommendation, Spock, not vague warnings.

SPOCK: Recommendation one. There’s a planet a few light days away from here. Delta Vega. It has a lithium cracking station. We may be able to adapt some of its power packs to our engines.

KIRK: And if we can’t? We’ll be trapped in orbit there. We haven’t enough power to blast back out.

SPOCK: It is the only possible way to get Mitchell off this ship.

KIRK: If you mean strand Mitchell there, I won’t do it. That station is fully automated. There’s not a soul on the whole planet. Even the ore ships call only once every twenty years.

SPOCK: Then you have one other choice. Kill Mitchell while you still can.

KIRK: Get out of here.

SPOCK: It is your only other choice, assuming you make it while you still have time.

KIRK: Will you try for one moment to feel? At least act like you’ve got a heart. We’re talking about Gary.

SPOCK: The captain of the Valiant probably felt the same way, and he waited too long to make his decision. I think we’ve both guessed that.

KIRK: Set course for Delta Vega.

KIRK: Star date 1313.1. We’re now approaching Delta Vega. Course set for a standard orbit. This planet, completely uninhabited, is slightly smaller than Earth. Desolate, but rich in crystal and minerals. Kelso’s task: transport down with a repair party, try to regenerate the main engines, save the ship. Our task: transport down a man I’ve known for fifteen years, and if we’re successful, maroon him there.

MITCHELL: I’m thirsty. It’s like a man who has been blind all of his life, suddenly being given sight. Sometimes I feel there’s nothing I couldn’t do, in time. Some people think that makes me a monster, don’t they, Jim?

KIRK: Are you reading all our thoughts, Gary?

MITCHELL: I can sense mainly worry in you, Jim. Safety of your ship.

KIRK: What would you do in my place?

MITCHELL: Probably just what Mister Spock is thinking now. Kill me while you can.

DEHNER: Stop it, Gary!

MITCHELL: I also know we’re orbiting Delta Vega, Jim. I can’t let you force me down there. I may not want to leave this ship, not yet. I may want another place. I’m not sure yet just what kind of a world I can use.

DEHNER: Use?

MITCHELL: I don’t understand it all yet, but if I keep growing, getting stronger, why, the things I could do, like– like maybe a god could do.

KIRK: I want him unconscious for a while.

MITCHELL: You fools! Soon I’ll squash you like insects.

KIRK: Energize.

KIRK: Can you do it, Lee?

KELSO: Maybe, if we can bypass the fuel bins without blowing ourselves up.

KIRK: Take him.

DEHNER: There’s not a soul on this planet but us?

KIRK: Nobody but us chickens, Doctor.

ALDEN: I think I’ve got the 203-R set, Lee.

KELSO: Good, Alden. Transport it up with you, will you?

ALDEN: Okay.

KIRK: The fuel bins, Lee. Could they be detonated from here?

KELSO: A destruct switch? I guess I could wire one up right there.

KIRK: Do it.

SPOCK: He’s regaining consciousness.

KIRK: Doctor Piper. I want only one medical officer here at any one time. The other will monitor him on the dispensary screen.

DEHNER: I’d like to stay now… try to talk to him.

MITCHELL: My friend James Kirk. Remember those rodent things on Dimorus? The poisoned darts they threw? I took one meant for you.

KIRK: And almost died. I remember.

MITCHELL: So why be afraid of me now?

KIRK: You’ve been testing your ability to take over the Enterprise. In the transporter room, you said something about us seeming like insects by comparison, squashing us if we got in your way.

MITCHELL: I was drugged then.

KIRK: Yes. In the Sickbay, you said if you were in my place, you’d kill a mutant like yourself.

MITCHELL: Why don’t you kill me then? Mister Spock is right, and you’re a fool if you can’t see it.

DEHNER: You don’t mean that, Gary.

MITCHELL: Man cannot survive if a race of true espers is born. In time you’ll understand that.

KIRK: Gary. Gary, don’t!

MITCHELL: Jim.

KIRK: His eyes went back to normal.

SPOCK: Fighting the force field drained his strength, for a while at least. He could be handled now.

MITCHELL: I’ll just keep getting stronger. You know that, don’t you.

SCOTT: It fits like a glove, Captain.

SCOTT: Oh, did Mister Spock get the phaser rifle we sent down?

KIRK: I didn’t order an– Affirmative. Landing party out.

SPOCK: He tried to get through the force field again. His eyes changed back faster. He didn’t become as weak.

KIRK: Doctor Dehner feels he isn’t that dangerous. What makes you right and a trained psychiatrist wrong?

SPOCK: Because she feels. I don’t. All I know is logic. In my opinion we’ll be lucky if we can repair this ship and get away in time.

KELSO: Direct to the power bins. From here you could blow up this whole valley.

KIRK: If Mitchell gets out, at your discretion, Lee, if sitting here, you think you’re the last chance, I want you to hit that button.

KIRK: Captain’s log, Star date 1313.3. Note commendations on Lieutenant Kelso and the engineering staff. In orbit above us, the engines of the Enterprise are almost fully regenerated. Balance of the landing party is being transported back up. Mitchell, whatever he’s become, keeps changing, growing stronger by the minute.

DEHNER: He’s been like that for hours now.

KIRK: Have Doctor Piper meet us in the control room with Kelso. We’ll all transport up together.

SPOCK: If he should try to stop us…

KIRK: Kelso will be on the destruct button until the last minute. I think he knows that.

DEHNER: I’m staying behind with him.

KELSO: Fission chamber three checks out. The station seems to be running fine.

SCOTT: You’re a talented thief, Kelso. Everything you sent up seems to be fitting in place.

KELSO: I’m kind of proud of the job we’ve done. We’re going to be ready to transport up–

KIRK: You’re leaving with the ship, Doctor.

DEHNER: He is not evil.

KIRK: I gave you an order, Doctor.

MITCHELL: You should have killed me while you could, James. Command and compassion is a fool’s mixture.

PIPER: It hit me, too, whatever it was. Kelso is dead, strangled. At least Spock’s alive.

KIRK: Doctor Dehner?

PIPER: She went with Mitchell.

KIRK: Don’t give him a pill until after I’m gone. It’s my fault Mitchell got as far as he did. Did you see their direction?

PIPER: Yes, there was some morning light. They were headed across the valley, to the left of the pointed peaks. There’s flatlands beyond.

KIRK: When Mister Spock recovers, you’ll both transport up immediately to the Enterprise.

PIPER: But Captain–

KIRK: If you have not received a signal from me within twelve hours, you’ll proceed at maximum warp to the nearest Earth base with my recommendation that this entire planet be subjected to a lethal concentration of neutron radiation. No protest on this, Mark. That’s an order.

DEHNER: It would take almost a miracle to survive here.

MITCHELL: Then I shall make one. Behold. You’ll soon share this feeling, Elizabeth. To be like God, to have the power to make the world anything you want it to be.

DEHNER: What’s wrong?

MITCHELL: A visitor. A very foolish man. You’ll enjoy being a god, Elizabeth. Blasphemy? No. Let there be food. Kaferian apples. Whenever we visited that planet, I always favored these. Can you hear me, James? You cannot see me. I’m not there. You follow the right path, James. You’ll come to me soon.

DEHNER: I can see him in my mind, too.

MITCHELL: Go to him, Elizabeth, talk to him. Now that you’re changing, I want you to see just how unimportant they are.

DEHNER: Yes, it just took a little longer for it to happen to me.

KIRK: You must help me… Before it goes too far.

DEHNER: What he’s doing is right for him and me.

KIRK: And for humanity? You’re still human…

DEHNER: No, I–

KIRK: At least partly, you are, or you wouldn’t be here talking to me.

DEHNER: Earth is really unimportant. Before long, we’ll be where it would have taken mankind millions of years of learning to reach.

KIRK: What will Mitchell learn in getting there? Will he know what to do with his power? Will he acquire the wisdom?

DEHNER: Please go back while you still can.

KIRK: Did you hear him joke about compassion? Above all else, a god needs compassion. Mitchell! Elizabeth.

DEHNER: What do you know about gods?

KIRK: Then let’s talk about humans, about our frailties. As powerful as he gets, he’ll have all that inside him.

DEHNER: Go back.

KIRK: You were a psychiatrist once. You know the ugly, savage things we all keep buried, that none of us dare expose. But he’ll dare. Who’s to stop him? He doesn’t need to care. Be a psychiatrist for one minute longer. What do you see happening to him? What’s your prognosis, Doctor?

DEHNER: He’s coming.

KIRK: Then watch him. Hang on to being a human for one minute longer.

MITCHELL: I’m disappointed in you, Elizabeth. I’ve been contemplating the death of an old friend. He deserves a decent burial, at least.

DEHNER: Stop it, Gary.

MITCHELL: Morals are for men, not gods.

KIRK: A god, but still driven by human frailty. Do you like what you see?

MITCHELL: Time to pray, Captain. Pray to me.

KIRK: To you? Not to both of you?

MITCHELL: Pray that you die easily.

KIRK: There’ll only be one of you in the end. One jealous god. If all this makes a god, or is it making you something else?

MITCHELL: Your last chance, Kirk.

KIRK: Do you like what you see? Absolute power corrupting absolutely.

DEHNER: Hurry. You haven’t much time.

KIRK: Gary, forgive me.

MITCHELL: For a moment, James, but your moment is fading.

DEHNER: I’m sorry. You can’t know what it’s like to be almost a god.

KIRK: Enterprise from Captain Kirk, come in.

KIRK: Captain’s log, Star date 1313.8. Add to official losses, Doctor Elizabeth Dehner. Be it noted she gave her life in performance of her duty. Lieutenant Commander Gary Mitchell, same notation. I want his service record to end that way. He didn’t ask for what happened to him.

SPOCK: I felt for him, too.

KIRK: I believe there’s some hope for you after all, Mister Spock.

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Transcripts taken from Chrissie’s Transcripts Site and modified.

Star Trek Transcripts: Charlie X

Posted on August 7, 2023 by TvMegasite Admin

Star Trek: Charlie X Transcript

KIRK: Captain’s Log, star date 1533.6. Now maneuvering to come alongside cargo vessel Antares. Its Captain and First officer are beaming over to us with an unusual passenger.

KIRK: All right, Chief, begin materialization. Captain Ramart, I’m Captain Kirk.

RAMART: This is my navigator Tom Nellis.

KIRK: How do you do?

NELLIS: How do you do?

RAMART: And this is our young castaway Charlie, Charlie Evans. His dossier.

KIRK: Mister Evans. We’ve heard a great deal about you. Welcome aboard.

RAMART: Wonderful boy, Charlie. Its been an honor having him aboard.

NELLIS: Why, it’s been a great pleasure. The things that he’s learned in the last

RAMART: Absolutely. To think this boy spent practically his whole life alone on that planet. Everyone killed; just a few microtapes to learn from.

CHARLIE: How many humans like me on this ship?

RAMART: Like a whole city in space, Charlie. Over four hundred in the crew of a starship, aren’t there, Captain?

KIRK: Four hundred and twenty eight, to be exact. Is there anything we can do for you, Captain? Medical supplies, provisions?

CHARLIE: Hundreds. All human, like me. That’s exciting. Is that the right word?

NELLIS: That’s perfect. It’s the exact word.

RAMART: You see, we’d like to keep Charlie with us, but with his closest living relatives on Colony Five and your vessel going that way, why–

CHARLIE: I’d like to see your ship now. All of it. The people and everything.

KIRK: You keep interrupting, Mister Evans. That’s considered wrong.

CHARLIE: I’m sorry.

KIRK: We have a large supply of entertainment tapes, gentlemen.

RAMART: No, we’ve a tight schedule to make, Captain. Just twenty of us, we’re making out fine.

KIRK: This must be a space first. A transport ship that doesn’t need anything?

RAMART: Nothing.

KIRK: Not even Saurian brandy?

RAMART: We’re fine, thank you. Pleasant journey, Captain.

KIRK: Thank you. Yeoman Rand, this is Charles Evans. Show him to his quarters and drop his records off at Doctor McCoy’s office, if you will?

RAND: Yes, sir. Come with me, please.

CHARLIE: Are you a girl? Is that a girl?

KIRK: That’s a girl.

KIRK: Captain’s Log, star date 1533.7. We have taken aboard an unusual passenger for transport to Colony Alpha Five: Charles Evans, the sole survivor of a transport crash fourteen years ago. The child, alone from age three, has not only survived, but has grown to intelligent, healthy adolescence.

MCCOY: Tell me….The ship’s supply of food concentrates couldn’t have lasted fourteen years.

CHARLIE: After that I found other things to eat, just growing around.

MCCOY: And you learned to talk by just listening to the ship’s tapes?

CHARLIE: The memory banks still worked. They talked to me, and I talked back.

MCCOY: You’re four-oh.

CHARLIE: Four?

MCCOY: Four-oh. One hundred percent. Sound of wind and limb.

CHARLIE: That, that Captain. Kirk?

MCCOY: Yeah.

CHARLIE: Why does he call me Mister Evans?

MCCOY: Because that’s your name.

CHARLIE: He’s not.. well, he isn’t like Captain Ramart.

MCCOY: Well, no. Captain Kirk is one of a kind, Charlie.

CHARLIE: Do you like me?

MCCOY: Why not?

CHARLIE: Some… the other ship…. they didn’t like me. I tried. I’m trying to make people like me. I want them to like me.

MCCOY: Most seventeen year olds do. Come on, let’s go. I’ll show you to your quarters.

CREWMAN 1: Hey, I’ll put the equipment away. See you in the rec room, huh?

CREWMAN 2: You got a deal, friend.

CREWMAN 1: All right. Hello.

CHARLIE: I brought you a present.

RAND: Oh, thank you. I really appreciate it, but– but I have to go. I’m on duty.

CHARLIE: Do you like that kind?

RAND: Yes, I… it’s my favorite. Where did you get it? They don’t have any in the ship’s stores.

CHARLIE: It’s a present.

RAND: I know, but where did…? Gee, I’m late, Charlie. I really have to go.

CHARLIE: Can’t you stay and talk a little while?

RAND: Look, I’m off duty at fourteen hundred. Why don’t you join me in recreation room six, Deck Three.

CHARLIE: You got a deal, friend.

RAND: Charlie!

CHARLIE: I thought… Don’t be angry. I didn’t– I wanted–

RAND: Charlie, you– you– you just don’t go around slapping girls on the– It’s okay, but er, just don’t do it again.

CHARLIE: Don’t be angry.

RAND: Look, why don’t you tell Captain Kirk or Doctor McCoy what you did. They’ll explain it to you. Okay?

CHARLIE: I will.

RAND: Okay.

MCCOY: But tell me, what reason would he have to lie if there are Thasians?

SPOCK: That is a very intriguing question. Scanners show no disturbances in this quadrant, Captain.

KIRK: Good. Doctor McCoy, Mister Spock is working out–

UHURA: Excuse me, Captain. Status report.

KIRK: Thank you. He’s working out a training program for Charlie Evans. Earth history, his own background, that sort of thing. I’d like you to give him the necessary medical orientation on the problems of, um, er, adolescence.

MCCOY: Well, don’t you think it’d be better for a strong father image like you? He already looks up to you.

KIRK: The job is yours, Bones. Flattery will get you nowhere.

SPOCK: Doctor, didn’t the boy make any reference at all to Thasians?

KIRK: Do you believe the legend, Mister Spock, that Thasians still exist on that planet in some form?

SPOCK: Charlie’s very existence proves in fact there must be some intelligent form of life on Thasus. He could not possibly have survived alone. The ship’s food concentrates would have been exhausted in a year or so.

MCCOY: By which time he would have been eating fruits, vegetables.

SPOCK: Probes of Thasus indicate very little edible plant life.

MCCOY: And probes have been known to be wrong, Spock.

MCCOY: Doctor, are you speaking scientifically or emotionally?

KIRK: Gentlemen, the fact is the boy is here, and he’s alive, and he needs our help.

MCCOY: And he needs a guide, and he needs a father image, Jim.

KIRK: Hmm. I’ll depend on your astute abilities to supply him with that, or find him one.

UHURA: I’m sorry. I did it again, didn’t I.

UHURA: Oh, on the starship Enterprise There’s someone who’s in Satan’s guise Whose devil ears and devil eyes Could rip your heart from you. At first, his look could hypnotize And then his touch would barbarize His alien love could victimize And rip your heart from you. And that’s why female astronauts, Oh, very female astronauts Wait terrified and overwrought To find what he will do. Oh, girls in space, be wary, be wary, be wary, Girls in space, be wary. We know not what he’ll do.

RAND: One more time!

UHURA: Now from a planet out in space, there comes a lad, not commonplace. A-seeking out his first embrace. He’s saving it for you. Oh, Charlie’s our new darling, our darling, our darling. Charlie’s our new darling. We know not what he’ll do.

CHARLIE: Want to see something? Turn them over.

RAND: Well, how did you do that?

CHARLIE: Oh, I can do a lot of card tricks. One of the men on the Antares showed me.

RAND: I don’t believe this!

KIRK: On Earth today, it’s Thanksgiving. If the crew has to eat synthetic meat loaf, I want it to look like turkey. Charlie.

CHARLIE: Captain? I’m supposed to ask you something. Why shouldn’t I…? I don’t know how to explain it….

KIRK: Say it right out, Charlie. That usually works.

CHARLIE: Well, in the corridor I saw– When Janice– when Yeoman Rand was… I did that to her. She didn’t like it. She said you’d explain it to me.

KIRK: Me. I see. Well, um, er… there are things you can do with a lady, er… Charlie, that you– er… There’s no right way to hit a woman. I mean, man to man is one thing, but, er… man and woman, er… it’s, er… it’s– er… Well, it’s– er… another thing. Do you understand?

CHARLIE: I don’t know.

UHURA: Captain Kirk.

KIRK: Excuse me. Kirk here.

UHURA: Captain Ramart of the Antares is on D channel.

KIRK: I’m on my way to the Bridge now.

CHARLIE: Can I come with you?

KIRK: I don’t think so, Charlie.

CHARLIE: I won’t get in the way.

KIRK: Okay.

UHURA: Can you boost your power, Antares. We’re barely reading your transmission.

RAMART: We’re at full output, Enterprise. I must speak to Captain Kirk.

KIRK: Kirk here, Captain Ramart.

RAMART: Captain, we’re just barely in range. I’ve got to warn…

KIRK: Re-establish contact.

UHURA: They’re not transmitting.

KIRK: Keep trying.

CHARLIE: It wasn’t very well constructed.

KIRK: Sweep the area of the Antares transmission with our probe scanners, Mister Spock.

SPOCK: Affirmative, Captain.

KIRK: You think something happened to the Antares, Charlie?

CHARLIE: I don’t know.

SPOCK: Picking up some debris on our scanners, Captain.

KIRK: What about the Antares?

SPOCK: The debris is what’s left of the Antares.

CHEF: Captain Kirk from ship’s Galley.

KIRK: Kirk here.

CHEF: Sir, I put meat loaf in the ovens. There’s turkeys in there now. Real turkeys.

KIRK: Chief, have you been

KIRK: Captain’s Log, star date 1535.8. UESPA headquarters notified of the mysterious loss of science probe vessel Antares.

SPOCK: Your mind is not on the game, Captain. Check. The Antares?

KIRK: A survey ship with twenty men aboard lost. No reason. Obviously, Captain Ramart was not aware of any trouble. I can’t figure it.

SPOCK: My own concern is more immediate. The boy.

KIRK: I can usually follow you, Mister Spock, but this time…?

SPOCK: He seemed to know what happened to the Antares before we did.

KIRK: I’d call it a pretty long reach for evidence, Mister Spock. Come in, Charlie.

SPOCK: And again, check.

KIRK: Checkmate.

SPOCK: Your illogical approach to chess does have its advantages on occasion, Captain.

KIRK: I prefer to call it inspired.

SPOCK: As you wish. At any rate, the game is yours.

KIRK: You play chess, Charlie?

CHARLIE: Oh, I– I watched them play on the Antares. Can I try?

KIRK: I place you in the hands of our chess master.

SPOCK: The principles of three-dimensional chess are basically mathematic, Charlie. You put the white here and the black on the secondary level.

CHARLIE: I know what it is. Let’s play.

SPOCK: Very well. That was a mistake, Charlie.

CHARLIE: No, it wasn’t.

SPOCK: Checkmate.

CHARLIE: No, it isn’t.

SPOCK: If you’ll excuse me.

RAND: Oh, Charlie. I was looking for you. I’d like you to meet Tina Lawton, Yeoman Third Class. Charlie Evans.

TINA: Hello, Charlie.

RAND: I thought you might enjoy meeting someone your own age.

CHARLIE: Can I talk to you, alone…?

RAND: Charlie, Tina’s–

TINA: Excuse me. I must be wanted somewhere.

RAND: That was– that was rude and completely uncalled-for.

CHARLIE: But I don’t need her. I want to talk to you.

RAND: That’s no excuse. You’d better learn that right now. You have to live with people, Charlie. You’re not alone anymore.

CHARLIE: But she’s not as– She doesn’t– She’s not the same. Not like you. She’s– she’s just a girl. You’re– you smell like a girl. All the other girls on the ship they– they look just like Tina. You’re the only one who looks like you. You can understand, can’t you? You know about being with somebody? Wanting to be? If I had the whole universe I’d give it to you. When I see you, I feel like I’m hungry all over. Hungry. Do you know how that feels?

KIRK: What?

RAND: I wasn’t sure I should, er, talk to you about this.

KIRK: Charlie’s a seventeen-year-old boy.

RAND: Exactly, and he’s–

KIRK: I talked to him about the swat.

RAND: It’s not that. Captain, I’ve seen the look before, and if something isn’t done, sooner or later I’m going to have to hurt him. Tell him to leave me alone, and that wouldn’t be good for him right now. You see, I’m his first crush, his first love, and his first–

KIRK: Yes, Yeoman, I’ll talk to him. I’ll look into it.

RAND: Thank you, sir.

KIRK: Come in, Charlie. Er, Charlie… Charlie, do you know anything about this chess piece? Did you notice anything peculiar in them when we were using them this afternoon?

CHARLIE: No, sir. Is that all?

KIRK: Er, no. No, no. Sit down. Charlie, being seventeen is more than how many years you’ve lived. It’s a whole other thing. Doctor McCoy could probably explain the biological conditions. Well, let’s– let’s use a specific… Yeoman Rand is a woman.

CHARLIE: Oh, I won’t hit her like that anymore.

KIRK: No, there’s more to it than that.

CHARLIE: Everything I do or say is wrong. I’m in the way, I don’t know the rules, and when I learn something and try to do it, suddenly I’m wrong!

KIRK: Now wait, wait….

CHARLIE: I don’t know what I am, or what I’m supposed to be, or even who. I don’t know why I hurt so much inside all the time.

KIRK: You’ll live, believe me. There’s nothing wrong with you that hasn’t gone wrong with every other human male since the model first came up.

CHARLIE: What if you care for someone? What do you do?

KIRK: You go slow. You be gentle. I mean, it’s not a one-way street, you know, how you feel, and that’s all. It’s how the girl feels, too. Don’t press, Charlie. If the girl feels anything for you at all, you’ll know it. Do you understand?

CHARLIE: You don’t think Janice– You– She could love me!

KIRK: She’s not the girl, Charlie. The years are wrong, for one thing, and there are other things.

CHARLIE: She can.

KIRK: No, Charlie.

CHARLIE: She is.

KIRK: No.

CHARLIE: But if I did what you said? If I was gentle…

KIRK: Charlie, there are a million things in this universe you can have, and there are a million things you can’t have. It’s no fun facing that, but that’s the way things are.

CHARLIE: Then what am I going to do?

KIRK: Hang on tight and survive. Everybody does.

CHARLIE: You don’t.

KIRK: Everybody, Charlie. Me, too.

CHARLIE: I’m trying, but I don’t know how.

KIRK: Kirk here.

UHURA: You asked to be notified when we were to make our course adjustments, sir.

KIRK: Ask Mister Spock to see to it. Charlie, come on with me.

KIRK: You’ve got to slap the floor to absorb the energy when you fall. Go ahead, try it. Like everything else, it takes practice, Charlie. Try again. Good. That’s much better. Here, now I’ll show you a shoulder roll. Try that.

CHARLIE: I don’t want to do that.

KIRK: Well, it makes it hard to teach you–

CHARLIE: I don’t want to do that.

KIRK: All right, Charlie. Lesson’s over for today.

CHARLIE: You were going to teach me how to fight.

KIRK: You have to learn to protect yourself in a fall before I do that. It’s more than teaching you to defend yourself. Charlie, I want you to learn. Charlie? Hey, Sam, let me borrow you for a couple easy throws, all right?

SAM: Right.

KIRK: Watch this, Charlie. That wasn’t so bad, was it? Now I’ll throw him. Here we go, Sam.

CHARLIE: That looks hard.

SAM: Oh.

KIRK: Come on, Charlie. Try it. Attaboy. Let’s go.

CHARLIE: Oh!

KIRK: That wasn’t so bad, was it?

CHARLIE: Don’t laugh at me.

KIRK: Cool off.

CHARLIE: Don’t laugh at me!

KIRK: Charlie.

CHARLIE: He shouldn’t have done that. It’s not nice to laugh at people.

KIRK: What happened to him, Charlie?

CHARLIE: He’s gone.

KIRK: That’s no answer.

CHARLIE: He’s gone! I didn’t mean to do that. He made me do it! He laughed at me.

CREWMAN: Bridge.

KIRK: Kirk here. Two men from security, on the double.

CREWMAN: Affirmative.

CHARLIE: What are you going to do to me?

KIRK: I’m confining you to quarters. I want you to stay there.

CHARLIE: I won’t let them hurt me. I’ll make them go away, too.

KIRK: They won’t hurt you, Charlie. They’ll take you to your quarters, Charlie. Go with them.

CHARLIE: No!

KIRK: Go to your quarters.

CHARLIE: He was going to hurt me.

KIRK: Go to your quarters or I’ll pick you up and carry you there.

CHARLIE: I won’t let you.

KIRK: That’s your choice, Charlie.

CHARLIE: I won’t let them hurt me.

KIRK: They won’t hurt you.

UHURA: Captain Kirk.

KIRK: Kirk here.

UHURA: Security reports that all phaser weapons have disappeared. Shall I repeat, Captain?

KIRK: No, I heard you. Have Doctor McCoy and Mister Spock meet me in the Briefing room.

SPOCK: Thasians have been referred to in our records as having the power to transmute objects or render substances invisible. It has generally been regarded as legend, but Charlie does seems to possess this same power.

KIRK: What are chances that Charlie’s not an Earthling, that he’s a Thasian?

MCCOY: No, I don’t think so… not unless they’re exactly like Earthlings. The development of his fingers and toes exactly matches the present development of mans on Earth.

SPOCK: Agreed.

KIRK: Well, whatever he is, we have some idea of the power he has. I know what I saw him do in the gymnasium.

MCCOY: Considering the effect a normal adolescent has on a home… Charlie, with the power he has–

KIRK: Short-tempered, because he doesn’t understand. He needs, he wants. Nothing happens fast enough.

SPOCK: The probability is he’s responsible for the destruction of the Antares, which would indicate a total disregard for human life.

KIRK: He doesn’t understand what life is. He’s a boy.

MCCOY: Well, what do we do with this boy, Jim? How do we keep him caged up?

KIRK: It goes even further than that, Doctor. We can’t take him with us to Earth Colony Five. Can you imagine what he’d do in an open, normal environment? I’ve talked with him, listened. He’s a boy in a man’s body, trying to be an adult with the adolescence in him getting in the way.

SPOCK: And with a weapon in him which could destroy you or anyone, anywhere on this ship.

MCCOY: Well, for the moment he’s stopped. You’re an authority he respects, Jim.

SPOCK: Agreed. The struggle must remain between you and him. Should any of us interfere…

CHARLIE: You wanted to ask me something, he said.

KIRK: Are you responsible for what happened to the Antares, Charlie?

CHARLIE: Why?

KIRK: Answer me.

CHARLIE: Yes. There was a warped baffle-plate on the shield of their energy pile. I made it go away. It would’ve blown up anyway. Well, they weren’t nice to me! They wanted to get rid of me. They don’t now.

KIRK: What about us, Charlie?

CHARLIE: I don’t know.

SPOCK: We’re in the hands of an adolescent.

KIRK: Lieutenant, raise Colony Five. I want to speak directly to the governor.

UHURA: Yes, sir.

KIRK: Navigator, lay a course away from Colony Five. Buy me some time.

NAVIGATOR: Yes, sir.

KIRK: Spock, get the doctor up here on the double. How bad is it?

UHURA: I think it’s all right, sir. Sir, there’s no reason for that panel to cross-circuit like that. I checked it over myself not fifteen minutes ago.

NAVIGATOR: Captain! I can’t feed any course co-ordinates into the panel, sir. It rejects the course change.

PILOT: Helm doesn’t respond either, sir.

KIRK: Mister Spock, you getting any readings on your instruments?

SPOCK: Yes, sir. There’s a Tyger, tyger, burning bright in the forest of the night.

KIRK: Mister Spock.

SPOCK: I’m trying to– Saturn rings around my head, down a road that’s Martian red.

CHARLIE: You’re trying to change course, Captain. You can’t do that. I want to get to Colony Five as soon as we can.

KIRK: Release the transmitter.

CHARLIE: You don’t need all that subspace chatter.

MCCOY: What’s going on here? Spock calls me to the Bridge and goes into some kind of poetry.

KIRK: See to her, Doctor.

SPOCK: Once upon a midnight dreary while I pondered, weak and weary.

CHARLIE: Very nice, Mister Ears. Oh, I can make him do anything, whirl around, laugh, anything.

KIRK: That’s enough, Charlie.

CHARLIE: Don’t you think he’s funny? I think he’s funny.

KIRK: Leave my crew alone.

SPOCK: Jim, he’ll soon reach a point where he won’t back down.

KIRK: I know.

TINA: Charlie, what’s wrong?

CHARLIE: I have something for you. Pink is your favorite, isn’t it?

RAND: You don’t walk into a room without knocking.

CHARLIE: Don’t ever lock your door on me again, Janice. I love you.

RAND: I’ll lock it when I please. What is it you want, anyway?

CHARLIE: You. I only want to be nice to you. I can give you anything. Just, just tell me.

RAND: I want you to get out.

CHARLIE: But I only want to be nice to you.

RAND: Get out, Charlie.

KIRK: Spock.

RAND: I can’t make it any plainer than that.

CHARLIE: I love you.

RAND: You don’t know what the word means.

CHARLIE: Then show me.

RAND: No! Charlie!

CHARLIE: Why did she do that? I loved her, but she wasn’t nice at all. What you did wasn’t nice either, but I still need you, Captain. The Enterprise isn’t quite like the Antares. Running the Antares was easy. You have to be nice. All right?

KIRK: Mister Spock?

SPOCK: My legs. They’re broken.

KIRK: Let him go, too, Charlie.

CHARLIE: Why?

KIRK: Because I’m telling you to. Because you need me to run the ship, and I need him.

CHARLIE: If you try to hurt me again, I’ll make a lot of people go away.

KIRK: And what about Yeoman Janice? Is she dead? Gone? Destroyed?

CHARLIE: I won’t tell you. Growing up isn’t so much. I’m not a man, and I can do anything! You can’t.

SPOCK: I’ll activate the force field myself. You can return to your section.

CHARLIE: He had a mean look. I had to freeze him. I like happy looks. Aren’t you coming in?

CHARLIE: That wasn’t nice. You’ll be sorry. You wait, you’ll see, you’ll be sorry you did that. You will. No. No laughing!

UHURA: Captain Kirk, my instruments show we’re receiving a message on subspace frequency three, ship-to-ship. I can’t hear it, sir.

KIRK: Are you creating that message, Charlie, or you’re blocking one that’s coming in.

CHARLIE: It’s my game, Captain. You have to find out. Like you said, that’s how the game’s played. You can have it now. I’ve locked on course for Colony Five again.

KIRK: I’ve waited long enough. I’m going to take him on.

MCCOY: You don’t have any special immunity. Not anymore. Pushed far enough, he’d send you off to oblivion, too.

KIRK: Mister Spock?

SPOCK: Out of the question.

KIRK: Wait a minute. Does Charlie…? Now, wait, Spock, has he done away with anybody since he took over?

SPOCK: Not so far as we know.

KIRK: Maybe he can’t. Could be he’s overreached himself. It’s a big ship. He’s taken full control. If we could tax his power, turn on every device on the ship, every circuit, every light, all of it, and while he’s fighting that… if I could distract him, maybe you could tranquilize him, keep him under until we reach Colony Five.

MCCOY: Risky, Jim.

KIRK: If we don’t try, Doctor, he’ll get rid of us anyway. There’s no choice, gentlemen, none at all.

CHARLIE: I can make you all go away anytime I want to.

KIRK: Get out of my chair, Charlie, and get out of it now.

CHARLIE: I’ve got your ship, Captain.

KIRK: Maybe, Charlie, but I don’t think you can handle any more. I think you’ve reached your limit and can’t take on one more thing, but you’re going to have to.

CHARLIE: I could’ve sent you away before, but I didn’t.

KIRK: You’re going to have to take me on.

CHARLIE: Don’t make me do it now.

KIRK: You’ve got my ship, and I want it back. I want my crew back, whole, if I have to break your neck to do it!

CHARLIE: Don’t push me. Sorry. I’m sorry, but… Stop it. I said stop it!

SPOCK: Captain, the navigation console is clear now. The ship is answering the helm.

UHURA: Sir, something off our starboard bow. The message says they’re from Thasus.

CHARLIE: Oh.

RAND: Captain, how did I…?

KIRK: It’s all right, Yeoman.

SPOCK: Sensors show there something’s there, Captain. Deflectors indicate no solid substance.

CHARLIE: No! Oh, no, please, don’t let them take me. I can’t live with them anymore. You’re my friends. You said you were my friends, remember? When I came aboard! Please, I want to go home. Take me home.

THASIAN: I have taken my form from centuries ago, so that I may communicate with you. We did not realize until too late that the boy had gone, and we are saddened that his escape cost the lives of the first ship. We could not help them, but we have returned your people and your ship to you. Everything is as it was.

CHARLIE: I won’t do it again. Please, I’ll be good. I won’t ever do it again. I’m sorry about the Antares. I’m sorry! When I came aboard! Please, I want to go with you. Help me!

KIRK: The boy belongs with his own kind.

THASIAN: That would be impossible.

KIRK: With training, we can teach him to live in our society. If he can be taught not to use his power…

THASIAN: We gave him the power so he could live. He will use it, always, and he would destroy you and your kind, or you would be forced to destroy him to save yourselves.

KIRK: Is there nothing you can do?

THASIAN: We offer him life, and we will take care of him. Come, Charles.

CHARLIE: Oh, please, don’t let them take me. I can’t even touch them! Janice, they can’t feel. Not like you! They don’t love! Please, I want to stay.

UHURA: Charlie’s back on board the Thasian ship, sir. They signal they’re leaving.

KIRK: It’s all right, Yeoman. It’s all over now.

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Transcripts taken from Chrissie’s Transcripts Site and modified.

Star Trek Transcript: The Man Trap

Posted on August 7, 2023August 7, 2023 by TvMegasite Admin

Star Trek: “The Man Trap” Transcript

KIRK: Captain’s log, Stardate 1513.1. Our position, orbiting planet M-113. On board the Enterprise, Mister Spock temporarily in command. On the planet the ruins of an ancient and long-dead civilisation. Ship’s surgeon McCoy and myself are now beaming down to the planet’s surface. Our mission, routine medical examination of archaeologist Robert Crater and his wife Nancy. Routine but for the fact that Nancy Crater is that one woman in Doctor McCoy’s past.

KIRK: Shall we pick some flowers, Doctor? When a man visits an old girlfriend, she usually expects something like that.

MCCOY: Is that how you get girls to like you, by bribing them? There doesn’t seem to be anybody around, does there?

KIRK: They’ll be along. You rushed us down ten minutes early.

KIRK: Professor Crater? Professor? Mrs. Crater? Nervous, Dr. McCoy?

MCCOY: Yeah, a little bit, I guess. You see, we walked out of each other’s lives ten years ago. She married Crater, and for all I know she may have forgotten me completely. Of all the bonehead ideas, Jim, how’d I let myself in for things like this?

NANCY: Leonard!

MCCOY: Nancy.

NANCY: Hello.

MCCOY: It’s good to see you.

NANCY: Let me look at you.

MCCOY: You haven’t aged a day. Oh, this is Captain Jim Kirk of the Enterprise.

KIRK: Mrs. Crater. I’ve heard a great deal about you.

NANCY: All good, I hope.

MCCOY: And Crewman Darnell.

DARNELL: How do you do, ma’am?

KIRK: Something wrong, Darnell?

DARNELL: Excuse me, sir, but, ma’am, if I didn’t know better I would swear you were someone I left behind on Wrigley’s Pleasure Planet. It’s funny, you’re exactly like a girl that–

MCCOY: A little less mouth, Darnell.

DARNELL: I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. I mean, I know it’s impossible, of course.

KIRK: Why don’t you step outside, Darnell?

DARNELL: Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.

KIRK: Maybe I’ll step outside, too.

NANCY: What? And let Plum examine me all alone?

KIRK: Plum?

MCCOY: Plum.

NANCY: A nickname I gave Leonard when we were very young.

MCCOY: I’ll, er, I’ll wait for the professor and I’ll catch you both at once.

NANCY: I’d better go get Bob. Every time he starts digging he forgets time, sleep, food, everything. Be back in a minute.

BLONDE NANCY: It’s quite warm here, isn’t it?

Kirk: Captain’s log, additional entry. Since our mission was routine, we had beamed down to the planet without suspicion. We were unaware each member of the landing party was seeing a different woman, a different Nancy Crater.

KIRK: Professor Crater, I’m Captain Kirk. This is–

CRATER: The heroic Captain and the intrepid doctor cross interstellar space to preserve our health. Your sense of duty is overwhelming. Now will you please go back where you came from and tell whoever issues your orders to leave me and my wife alone. We need salt against the heat. Aside from that, we’re doing very well, thank you.

MCCOY: I’m pleased you’re doing well, but I’m required to confirm that fact.

CRATER: Doubtless the good surgeon will enjoy prodding and poking us with his arcane machinery. Go away, we don’t want you.

MCCOY: What you want is unimportant right now. What you will get is required by the book.

KIRK: Quote: All research personnel on alien planets are required to have their health certified by a starship surgeon at one-year intervals.” Like it or not, Professor, as commander of the starship, I’m required–

CRATER: To show your gold braid to everyone. You love it, don’t you?

KIRK: He’s all yours, Plum. Doctor McCoy.

MCCOY: Sit down and breathe deeply, please.

CRATER: Did I hear you call him Doctor McCoy?

MCCOY: You did.

CRATER: McCoy. I’ve heard Nancy speak of a Doctor McCoy.

MCCOY: That’s me. Didn’t she mention I was here?

CRATER: You’ve seen Nancy?

KIRK: She went out to get you.

CRATER: You’ve seen her too? You were with the good Doctor?

KIRK: Yes. Why?

CRATER: Nothing. It’s just that it gives me pleasure to know that she’s gotten to see an old friend and has a chance for some company. It’s different for me, I enjoy solitude. But for a woman. You understand, of course?

MCCOY: Well, it certainly hasn’t aged her. She looks exactly as I knew her twelve years ago. Amazing, Jim. Like a girl of twenty five.

CRATER: Sorry. I’m sorry, Captain, sit down. I seem to have forgotten my manners.

KIRK: Quite all right.

MCCOY: I’m not joking, Jim. She hasn’t aged a day. She doesn’t have a grey hair on her head.

KIRK: She’s got some grey, Bones. Excuse me, Professor, she’s a handsome woman, yes, but hardly twenty five.

CRATER: You’ve seen my wife with the eyes of your past attachment, Doctor. I’m sure when Nancy lets– when you see her again, she’ll be a believable age.

MCCOY: Well, at any rate, she doesn’t look a day over thirty.

CRATER: Genuine affection. I’m glad you still feel it for her. Leonard, isn’t it? She’s a fine woman.

MCCOY: Open your mouth.

CRATER: Why, I thought the machine–

MCCOY: The machine is capable of almost anything, but I’ll still put my trust in a healthy set of tonsils. Now, open your mouth.

KIRK: McCoy.

MCCOY: Dead, Jim. Strange. A red mottling all over his face.

KIRK: What happened?

CRATER: What do you suppose happened, Captain? You beam down a crewman who doesn’t know better than to eat an untested plant.

KIRK: I’ve just lost a crewman, Mrs. Crater. I want to know what happened.

NANCY: Well, I, I–

MCCOY: Take it easy, Nancy. Just tell us what you know.

NANCY: I was just… I couldn’t find Bob, and I was coming back. I crossed to your crewman. I wanted him to know I wasn’t offended by the things he’d said back there. You remember…. Then I, I noticed he had a Borgia plant in his hand. Before I could say anything, he, he’d taken a bite from it. He fell, his face all twisted, and– Leonard, you’re looking at me like you don’t believe me.

MCCOY: No, no, no, no, it’s not that. It’s something entirely different. Jim, I suppose we could complete these examinations later.

CRATER: We don’t need an examination. You can see that. Perhaps you’d better take your man and–

KIRK: We’re well aware of our next duties, Professor. We’ll complete your examinations tomorrow. Transporter room.

CREWMAN: Transporter room, Captain.

KIRK: Lock onto us. Three beaming up.

SCOTT: Locked onto you, Captain.

NANCY: Salt. You did ask them about more salt tablets?

CRATER: I’ll take care of the provisioning, Nancy.

SPOCK: Miss Uhura, your last sub-space log contained an error in the frequencies column.

UHURA: Mister Spock, sometimes I think if I hear that word, “frequency” once more, I’ll cry.

SPOCK: Cry?

UHURA: I was just trying to start a conversation.

SPOCK: Well, since it is illogical for a communications officer to resent the word, “frequency,” I have no answer.

UHURA: No, you have an answer. I’m an illogical woman who’s beginning to feel too much a part of that communications console. Why don’t you tell me I’m an attractive young lady, or ask me if I’ve ever been in love? Tell me how your planet Vulcan looks on a lazy evening when the moon is full.

SPOCK: Vulcan has no moon, Miss Uhura.

UHURA: I’m not surprised, Mister Spock.

CREWMAN: Transporter room to Bridge. Landing party returning. They report one death.

SPOCK: Bridge acknowledging.

UHURA: I don’t believe it.

SPOCK: Explain.

UHURA: You explain. That means that somebody is dead and you just sit there. It could be Captain Kirk. He’s the closest thing you have to a friend.

SPOCK: Lieutenant, my demonstration of concern will not change what happened. The transporter room is very well-manned and they will call if they need my assistance.

MCCOY: She called it a Borgia plant.

KIRK: Something new to me.

SPOCK: Bridge to Dispensary.

KIRK: Go ahead, Mister Spock.

SPOCK: Borgia plant listed in library record tapes as carbon group three vegetation similar to Earth nightshade family. Alkaloid poison. Chemical structure common to Class M planets. About the strange mottling on his facial skin surface…there is no reference to this symptom.

MCCOY: Hmm. Well, then, this man wasn’t poisoned.

KIRK: Stand by, Mister Spock. She said she saw him eat the plant.

MCCOY: She’s mistaken. I know alkaloid poison– what to look for. There’s not a trace of it in his body.

KIRK: There were bits of the plant in his mouth.

MCCOY: Jim, don’t tell me my business. He could not have swallowed any. My instruments would have picked up any trace of it whatsoever.

KIRK: Then what kills a healthy man–

MCCOY: I’ll tell you something else. This man shouldn’t be dead. I can’t find anything wrong with him. According to all the tests he should just get up and walk away from here. I don’t know. I’ll have the tests double-checked. My eyes may be tricking me. I swear, Jim, when I first saw her she looked just as I’d known her ten years ago. Granted, for a moment I may have been looking at her through a romantic haze…

KIRK: How your lost love affects your vision, Doctor, doesn’t interest me. I’ve lost a man. I want to know what killed him.

MCCOY: Yes, sir.

Kirk: Captain’s log, Stardate 1513.4. In orbit around planet M-113. One crewman, member of the landing party, dead by violence. Cause unknown, but we are certain the cause of death was not poison.

UHURA: Message, Captain. Starship base on Caran 4 requesting explanation of our delay here, sir. Space Commander Dominguez says we have supplies he urgently needs.

Kirk: Tell Jose he’ll get his chili peppers when we get there. Tell him they’re prime Mexican reds. I handpicked them myself, but he won’t die if he goes a few more days without them. Got it?

UHURA: Got it, Captain.

KIRK: Well?

SPOCK: No mistake in our record tapes. Borgia plant. Its sole deadly property is alkaloid poison.

KIRK: And Professor Crater and wife?

SPOCK: Check out perfectly. They arrived here nearly five years ago. Visited by various vessels, made fairly heavy shipments out, of artefacts and reports. However, there has been a marked drop in shipments during the last year.

MCCOY: Dispensary to Captain.

KIRK: Kirk here.

MCCOY: We found something.

KIRK: What is it?

MCCOY: I’d rather not put it on the speaker.

SPOCK: Fascinating.

MCCOY: So improbable we almost didn’t check it.

KIRK: What?

SPOCK: Sodium chloride. Not a trace of it.

MCCOY: This man has no salt in his body at all.

KIRK: Can you explain that, Doctor?

MCCOY: I can’t, except that what we normally carry in our bodies is gone from his.

SPOCK: He would die almost instantly.

KIRK: How? There isn’t a mark on his body.

MCCOY: Except the red rings on his face.

KIRK: You called that skin mottling.

MCCOY: I thought it was, sir. Another error on my part.

KIRK: I’m not counting them, Bones. Are you in the mood for an apology?

MCCOY: Oh, forget it. I probably was mooning over her. I should have been thinking about my job.

KIRK: Perhaps you were. Both Nancy and Crater went out of their way to mention one item they needed.

MCCOY: Salt tablets.

KIRK: Mister Spock, outfit a landing party. We’re beaming down with some questions.

CRATER: One might think that you had more important duties than harassing people, Captain.

KIRK: I have, Professor. Believe me, I have. Where is Mrs. Crater? I want to talk to her, too.

CRATER: Captain, you can’t just beam down here and bully us, and interfere with our work.

KIRK: Mrs. Crater. I won’t ask again.

CRATER: Possibly at the other diggings. We don’t keep military logs.

KIRK: Green, find her.

GREEN: Yes, sir.

KIRK: Mister Spock.

SPOCK: Standing by.

KIRK: Sturgeon, transport a sample of the plant to Mister Spock. We’ll check if it’s actually the Borgia plant or something we don’t understand. You got that, Mister Spock?

SPOCK: Complete analysis.

CRATER: Captain, considering the inescapable fact that you are a trespasser on my planet…

KIRK: Your complaint is noted, sir. Look, something we don’t understand killed one of my men. It could prove to be a danger to you and Mrs. Crater, too.

CRATER: We’ve been here for almost five years. If there were anything hostile here we would know about it, wouldn’t we?

KIRK: Bones, tell the professor what the autopsy revealed.

MCCOY: Our crewman died of salt depletion. Sudden, total loss of it. Medically impossible by any standards.

KIRK: And by coincidence, both you and Mrs. Crater requested salt tablets.

CRATER: And your esteemed physician cannot explain our need for salt tablets?

KIRK: We’re all aware of the need for salt on a hot and arid planet like this, Professor, but it’s a mystery, and I don’t like mysteries. They give me a bellyache, and I’ve got a beauty right now.

CRATER: Nancy and I started with twenty five pounds. This is what we have left. Now, what is so mysterious about that?

MCCOY: Salt.

KIRK: One of the missions of the Enterprise is to protect human life in places like this. I’m going to have to ask you and Mrs. Crater to stay aboard my ship until we find out what killed that crewman.

CRATER: But you can’t do that.

KIRK: But I can, Professor.

CRATER: It’ll interfere with our work.

KIRK: How? You’ve been here five years. Will a couple of days make a difference? Mister Spock.

SPOCK: Spock here.

KIRK: Arrange quarters for Professor and Mrs. Crater. Did you get the plant analysis?

SPOCK: It is the Borgia variety, Captain. Could not have caused Darnell’s death.

MCCOY: Jim, he’s run off.

CRATER: Nancy! You! Salt! I’ve got salt! Smell it! Smell it, Nancy!

KIRK: Professor Crater! Professor Crater!

MCCOY: Professor Crater!

KIRK: Professor Crater! Professor! Professor!

MCCOY: Jim! Jim, it’s Sturgeon. He’s dead.

KIRK: We’d better locate Crewman Green. Green! Green! Crewman Green, report! Green!

MCCOY: Crewman Green, report! Green! Green, where are you? Could it be Crater? He came this way.

KIRK: I don’t know. Green! Did you see this?

GREEN: Yes, sir. Sturgeon was dead when I found him. I was circling to find whatever it was.

MCCOY: Same red rings on his face. Have you seen Nancy? Mrs. Crater?

GREEN: No, sir. I checked all through the ruins.

MCCOY: I’m worried about her, Jim. She’s not at the quarters, she’s not at the diggings. She could be in trouble. Nancy!

KIRK: Crater!

MCCOY: Nancy, it’s Leonard!

KIRK: We’re beaming aboard the ship, Doctor.

MCCOY: You can’t leave her!

KIRK: We can’t search this whole planet on foot.

MCCOY: Jim!

KIRK: You could learn something from Mister Spock, Doctor. Stop thinking with your glands. We’ve equipment aboard the Enterprise that could pinpoint a match lit anywhere on this planet, or the heat of a body. Transporter room, Kirk speaking. Three to beam up.

KIRK: Kirk to Bridge.

SPOCK: Spock here.

KIRK: Break out the surface search equipment. I want co-ordinates on two people.

SPOCK: Acknowledged.

KIRK: There’s a body down there. Sturgeon.

TRANSPORTER OPERATOR: We’ll bring him home, sir.

KIRK: You could use some sleep, Bones.

MCCOY: All right, Jim.

KIRK: Bridge.

RAND: Oh, Green, what went on down there? Who do you think you are?

SPOCK: Something odd, Captain. You said two people.

KIRK: Professor and Nancy Crater.

SPOCK: We get a reading on only one person… probably Crater. He’s circling as if searching for something.

KIRK: Expand search radius.

SPOCK: Yes, sir.

RAND: Why don’t you go chase an asteroid?

REDSHIRT: Hey, Janice, is that for me?

RAND: Don’t you wish it was?

BLUESHIRT: How about that?

REDSHIRT: Yeah, how’d you like to have her as your personal yeoman?

RAND: Where are you, Sulu?

SULU: In here feeding the weepers, Janice.

RAND: I’ve got your tray.

SULU: May the Great Bird of the Galaxy bless your planet.

RAND: Thank you. Hello, Beauregard. How are you today, darling?

SULU: Her name’s Gertrude.

RAND: No, it’s a he plant. A girl can tell.

SULU: Why do people have to call inanimate objects she, like, “She’s a fast ship.”

RAND: He is not an inanimate object. He’s so animate he makes me nervous. In fact, I keep expecting one of these plants of yours to grab me.

SULU: Hello, Green.

RAND: He’s not talking today. You been nipping Saurian brandy or something?

SULU: Take it easy. Calm down. Very sensitive.

RAND: He’s the real spook. Suppose he’s going space happy or something?

UHURA: The door to my quarters still rattles when it opens. Would you stop by and see if you can do something about it? Thanks, Bobby. Crewman, do I know you?

CREWMAN: In a way, ma’am. You were just thinking of someone like me. I’m guessing of course, but you do look a little lonely.

UHURA: I see. So naturally, when I’m lonely I think of you.

CREWMAN: Ina cuvanea mwanamke turee.

UHURA: Una kafeeri Hur. You’re Swahili?

KIRK: Lieutenant Uhura to the Bridge. Lieutenant Uhura to the Bridge.

RAND: I’d better get this tray back. Bye, Beauregard.

SULU: Wait a minute, I’ll walk along.

KIRK: Lieutenant Uhura, report to the Bridge.

UHURA: Lieutenant Uhura. On my way, sir.

MCCOY: McCoy to Bridge. Captain there?

KIRK: Kirk here. Nothing to report, Doctor. We haven’t located Mrs. Crater. What’s the matter, can’t you sleep?

MCCOY: Nope.

KIRK: Try taking one of those red pills you gave me last week. You’ll sleep.

SPOCK: The simple fact is unless there’s something seriously wrong with the ship’s equipment, there’s only one person within a one hundred mile circle.

KIRK: All right. We’ll triangulate on him. We’ll let Professor Crater explain what happened to his wife. Remember my instructions, Lieutenant. Keep a tight fix on us. If we let out a yell, I want an armed party down there before the echo dies.

UHURA: Yes, Captain.

MCCOY: Nancy. Well, come in. come in. I’ve been worried sick about you. I wonder why Jim didn’t tell me he found you.

NANCY: I’m so happy to see you, Leonard. The others, they– I, I don’t relate to them as much as you. You have such strong memories of me.

MCCOY: Well…

NANCY: You do care, don’t you, Leonard? It makes me feel so, so safe.

MCCOY: Nancy, er…

NANCY: My husband? I like your feelings better. Much stronger. But you’re tired, You need to rest.

MCCOY: You’re as bad as Jim Kirk. He’s been telling me to take these.

NANCY: I think you should. I’ll get you some water.

RAND: Look at his face!

SULU: Bridge. Sulu. Trouble on Deck Nine, Section Two. We need a medical team.

KIRK: Captain’s log, Stardate 1513.8. I am now certain that the violent death of my crewmen was caused by some strange life-form.

MCCOY: I was so worried. Your husband acting strange, crewmen dying…

NANCY: You’re so tired, darling. Just rest now.

UHURA: Medical department alert. Doctors and medics acknowledge.

NANCY: It’s nothing, dear. It’s nothing. You just sleep. Nancy will take care of everything.

UHURA: Dr. McCoy to the Bridge. Dr. McCoy to the Bridge. Dr. McCoy to the Bridge.

KIRK: Captain’s log, additional. Armed and able-bodied crewmen are not attacked and slaughtered this easily. Apparently, the killer can immobilize them as it approaches perhaps with some hypnotic or paralysing power. The answer lies with Professor Crater.

KIRK: Professor Crater.

CRATER: Go away! We don’t want you here.

KIRK: We? Where’s your wife, Professor? We’re concerned about her.

CRATER: I’m armed. Go away.

KIRK: Where’s your wife, Professor?

CRATER: She’s no concern of yours.

KIRK: We’re worried about her safety, aren’t you? Professor, you’re a reasonable man, let me– Kirk here.

SULU: Casualty, Captain. Barnhart was found dead on Deck Nine. Same symptoms.

SPOCK: Spock cutting in, Captain. Something here, through the arches to your left.

KIRK: Stand by, Mister Sulu. Spock has something.

SPOCK: Green.

KIRK: He beamed up to the ship with us.

SPOCK: Or something did.

KIRK: Enterprise from Kirk.

SULU: Bridge. Sulu.

KIRK: You have an intruder aboard. Could be masquerading as Crewman Green. General quarters, security condition three.

SULU: GQ security three, sir.

SULU: General quarters three. Intruder alert. GQ three. Intruder alert. General quarters three. Intruder alert. GQ three. Intruder alert.

UHURA: Reporting GQ three secure, Captain. Do you require assistance there?

SPOCK: Crater knows the creature. If we could take him alive…

KIRK: Negative, Lieutenant, but keep locked in on us. Kirk out. Let’s get him.

CRATER: We don’t want you here! We’re happy alone! I’ll kill to stay alone. You hear that, Kirk? Or you’ll have to kill me. I don’t care either way.

SPOCK: Obviously, taking him alive is going to be difficult.

KIRK: Set your phaser on one quarter. I’ll leave mine on stun.

SPOCK: Why risk your life for his?

KIRK: He’s not trying to kill us, he’s trying to frighten us, and he’s doing a pretty good job.

SULU: GQ three now secured except for Decks Five, Seven, and Ten. Come in, please.

UHURA: He’s not in supply and maintenance.

SULU: Go to Engineering now. Run through file photos of the crewmen there.

UHURA: Check.

SECURITY: Deck Five reporting. Crewman Green is not in his quarters. No one has seen him

SULU: Keep in mind if you find him, he’s not Crewman Green. The Captain reports Crewman Green is dead.

RAND: And he, or rather it, followed me. I thought there was something twitchy about him.

SULU: He– whatever, was probably your crewman, too, Lieutenant.

UHURA: He must have been it. You know, I would have remembered a crewman like him.

MCCOY: The creature leading you a merry chase, Mister Sulu?

SULU: The creature?

MCCOY: Or whatever it is that’s killing the crewmen. Perhaps I can help. Fill me in.

KIRK: Set.

SPOCK: Acknowledged. Crater!

KIRK: Your wife, Professor. Where is she? Your wife, Professor. Where is she?

CRATER: She was the last of her kind.

KIRK: The last of her kind?

CRATER: The last of its kind. Earth history, remember? Like the passenger pigeon or buffalo. Ooh! I feel strange.

KIRK: Just stunned. You’ll be able to think in a minute.

SPOCK: The Earth buffalo. What about it?

CRATER: Once there were millions of them… prairies black with them. One herd covered three whole states, and when they moved they were like thunder.

SPOCK: And now they’re gone. Is that what you mean?

CRATER: Like the creatures here. Once there were millions of them. Now there’s one left. Nancy understood.

SPOCK: Always in the past tense.

KIRK: Where’s your wife? Where is she now?

CRATER: Dead. Buried up on the hill. It killed her.

KIRK: When?

CRATER: Oh, a year, or was it two?

KIRK: Kirk to Enterprise.

SULU: Bridge to Captain. Sulu here.

KIRK: It’s definite, Mister Sulu. The intruder can assume any shape. Crewmen, you, myself, anyone. Do you understand?

SULU: Affirmative, Captain.

KIRK: Go to GQ four.

SULU: General quarters four, Captain.

CRATER: The creature was trying to survive. It has that right, doesn’t it?

KIRK: Kirk to transporter room. Three to beam up.

CRATER: They needed salt to stay alive. There was no more salt. It’s the last one. The buffalo. There is no difference.

KIRK: There’s one, Professor. Your creature is killing my people.

KIRK: Captain’s log, continuing. The Enterprise has been invaded by a creature capable of assuming any form, and with the capacity to paralyse and draw the life from any one of us.

SULU: Deck Five, Section Three. Deck Five, Section Three. Report.

SECURITY: Security 3 A here. 3 B in sight.

UHURA: Negative, Captain. I’ve checked every face on this vessel. It was not a crewman I saw.

KIRK: Yeoman Rand, how long was this Green with you?

RAND: As long as he… it thought it could get to the salt on my tray, sir.

KIRK: Mister Spock?

SPOCK: Supplies of salt have been set out as bait at all decks and engineering levels, Captain. However, no one or nothing has approached them as yet.

KIRK: Dr. McCoy?

MCCOY: Yes?

KIRK: Medical department report, Doctor.

MCCOY: Oh. Well, we could offer it salt without tricks. There’s no reason for it to attack us.

SPOCK: Your attitude is laudable, Doctor, but your reasoning is reckless.

CRATER: The creature is not dangerous when fed.

MCCOY: No, it’s simply trying to survive by using its natural ability to take other forms.

CRATER: The way the chameleon uses its protective colouring, an ability retained no doubt from its primitive state, the way we have retained our incisor teeth. They were once fangs. Certain of our muscles were designed for chase. It uses its ability the way we would use our muscles and teeth if necessary, to stay alive.

MCCOY: And like us, it’s an intelligent animal. There’s no need to hunt it down.

SPOCK: A very interesting hypothesis, Doctor. Briefing room.

SULU: All the halls sealed off. All weapons accounted for and locked away. Security four in effect on every level. Still no lead on intruder.

KIRK: Thank you, Lieutenant. Continue the search. Crater, we don’t know who or what we’re looking for. We need your help, and now.

CRATER: I demanded, I even begged that you get off my planet.

KIRK: Can you recognise this thing When you see it? Professor, I’ll forego charges up to this point but this creature’s aboard my ship and I’ll have it, or I’ll have your skin, or both. Now where is it?

CRATER: I loved Nancy very much. Few women like my Nancy. She lives in my dreams. She walks and sings in them.

KIRK: And it becomes Nancy for you.

CRATER: Not because of tricks. It doesn’t trick me. It needs love as much as it needs salt. When it killed Nancy, I almost destroyed it, but– it isn’t just a beast. It is intelligent and the last of its kind.

KIRK: You bleed too much, Crater. You’re too pure and noble. Are you saving the last of its kind, or has this become Crater’s private heaven, here on this planet? This thing becomes wife, lover, best friend, wise man, fool, idol, slave. It isn’t a bad life to have everyone in the universe at your beck and call, and you win all the arguments.

CRATER: You don’t understand.

KIRK: Have you learned to see this thing in whatever form it becomes?

CRATER: Yes.

KIRK: Are you going to help us find it?

CRATER: Sorry, I can’t.

SPOCK: Recommend we use truth serum, Captain.

KIRK: Doctor?

MCCOY: Well, I resist using it, but in this case the professor will give us the truth.

KIRK: Take him.

SPOCK: I’ll accompany you, Doctor.

MCCOY: Oh, yes. Of course.

CREWMAN: Captain Kirk to dispensary. Captain Kirk to dispensary.

SPOCK: It wasn’t McCoy. It was the creature. It hit me. Crater grabbed my phaser. I wondered about McCoy. Doubt had crossed my mind.

RAND: Captain. Professor Crater.

KIRK: Dead. But it had you, too.

SPOCK: Fortunately, my ancestors spawned in another ocean than yours did. My blood cells are quite different.

NANCY: Leonard. Leonard, wake up. Please help me. Help me, Leonard. They’re trying to kill me. Don’t let them kill me!

MCCOY: Easy, easy. Nobody’s going to–

NANCY: But you must help me!

KIRK: Move aside, Bones.

MCCOY: What’s going on here, Jim?

KIRK: She’s not Nancy, Bones.

MCCOY: Are you insane?

KIRK: It killed four crewmen. Now Crater.

MCCOY: It?

KIRK: The creature. It kills. It needs salt to live. Bones, move aside.

MCCOY: No!

KIRK: My guess is she needs more. You want it, Nancy? Come and get it.

MCCOY: You’re frightening her, Jim.

KIRK: Not fright. Hunger. Look at her.

NANCY: Leonard, if you love me, make him go away.

KIRK: Come on. You want this, Nancy? Come on Nancy. Come and get it. Come and get it. Here it is.

NANCY: Leonard, help me.

MCCOY: Stop it, Jim!

KIRK: McCoy, get out of the way!

MCCOY: Are you out of your mind?

KIRK: Get out of the way.

SPOCK: It’s killing the Captain. Shoot it, Doctor, quickly!

MCCOY: No! No!

SPOCK: It’s killing the captain! Shoot, quick!

MCCOY: I won’t shoot Nancy.

SPOCK: This is not Nancy. If she were Nancy, could she take this?

MCCOY: Stop it! Stop it, Spock! Stop it!

SPOCK: Is that Nancy, Doctor?

MCCOY: No. No!

NANCY: Leonard. Leonard, no. Leonard, please.

MCCOY: Lord, forgive me.

KIRK: I’m sorry, Bones.

SULU: Ready to leave orbit, Captain.

SPOCK: Something wrong, Captain?

KIRK: I was thinking about the buffalo, Mister Spock. Warp one, Mister Sulu.

SULU: Warp one, sir. Leaving orbit.

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Transcripts taken from Chrissie’s Transcripts Site and modified.

Star Trek Transcript: The Cage

Posted on August 7, 2023 by TvMegasite Admin

Star Trek: The Cage Transcript

SPOCK: Check the circuit.

TYLER: All operating, sir.

SPOCK: It can’t be the screen, then. Definitely something out there, Captain, headed this way.

TYLER: It could be these meteorites.

NUMBER ONE: No, it’s something else. There’s still something out there.

TYLER: It’s coming at the speed of light, collision course. The meteorite beam has not deflected it, Captain.

NUMBER ONE: Evasive maneuvers, sir?

PIKE: Steady as we go.

GARISON: It’s a radio wave, sir. We’re passing through an old-style distress signal.

PIKE: They were keyed to cause interference and attract attention this way.

GARISON: A ship in trouble making a forced landing, sir. That’s it. No other message.

TYLER: I have a fix. It comes from the Talos star group.

NUMBER ONE: We’ve no ships or Earth colonies that far out.

SPOCK: Their call letters check with a survey expedition. SS Columbia. It disappeared in that region approximately eighteen years ago.

TYLER: It would take that long for a radio beam to travel from there to here.

SPOCK: Records show the Talos group has never been explored. Solar system similar to Earth, eleven planets. Number four seems to be Class M, oxygen atmosphere.

NUMBER ONE: Then they could still be alive, even after eighteen years.

PIKE: If they survived the crash.

SPOCK: We aren’t going to go, to be certain?

PIKE: Not without any indication of survivors, no. Continue to the Vega Colony and take care of our own sick and injured first. You have the helm. Maintain present course.

NUMBER ONE: Yes, sir.

BOYCE: Boyce here.

PIKE: Drop by my cabin, Doctor. What’s that? I didn’t say there’s anything wrong with me.

BOYCE: I understand we picked up a distress signal.

PIKE: That’s right. Unless we get anything more positive on it, it seems to me the condition of our own crew takes precedent. I’d like to log the ship’s doctor’s opinion, too.

BOYCE: Oh, I concur with yours, definitely.

PIKE: Good. I’m glad you do, because we’re going to stop first at the Vega Colony and replace anybody who needs hospitalization and also– What the devil are you putting in there, ice?

BOYCE: Who wants a warm martini?

PIKE: What makes you think I need one?

BOYCE: Sometimes a man’ll tell his bartender things he’ll never tell his doctor. What’s been on your mind, Chris, the fight on Rigel Seven?

PIKE: Shouldn’t it be? My own yeoman and two others dead, seven injured.

BOYCE: Was there anything you personally could have done to prevent it?

PIKE: Oh, I should have smelled trouble when I saw the swords and the armor. Instead of that, I let myself get trapped in that deserted fortress and attacked by one of their warriors.

BOYCE: Chris, you set standards for yourself no one could meet. You treat everyone on board like a human being except yourself, and now you’re tired and you–

PIKE: You bet I’m tired. You bet. I’m tired of being responsible for two hundred and three lives. I’m tired of deciding which mission is too risky and which isn’t, and who’s going on the landing party and who doesn’t, and who lives and who dies. Boy, I’ve had it, Phil.

BOYCE: To the point of finally taking my advice, a rest leave?

PIKE: To the point of considering resigning.

BOYCE: And do what?

PIKE: Well, for one thing, go home. Nice little town with fifty miles of parkland around it. Remember I told you I had two horses, and we used to take some food and ride out all day.

BOYCE: Ah, that sounds exciting. Ride out with a picnic lunch every day.

PIKE: I said that’s one place I might go. I might go into business on Regulus or on the Orion colony.

BOYCE: You, an Orion trader, dealing in green animal women, slaves?

PIKE: The point is this isn’t the only life available. There’s a whole galaxy of things to choose from.

BOYCE: Not for you. A man either lives life as it happens to him, meets it head-on, and licks it, or he turns his back on it and starts to wither away.

PIKE: Now you’re beginning to talk like a doctor, bartender.

BOYCE: Take your choice. We both get the same two kinds of customers. The living and the dying.

SPOCK: Mister Spock here. We’re intercepting a follow-up message, sir. There are crash survivors on Talos.

GARISON: Eleven survivors from crash. Gravity and oxygen within limits. Food and water obtainable, but unless. The message faded at that point, sir.

PIKE: Address intercraft.

TYLER: System open.

PIKE: This is the captain. Our destination is the Talos star group. Our time warp, factor seven.

TYLER: Course computed and on the screen.

NUMBER ONE: All decks have acknowledged, sir.

PIKE : Engage.

TYLER: On course, sir.

PIKE: Yeoman.

COLT: Yes, sir.

PIKE: I thought I told you that when I’m on the bridge–

COLT: But you wanted the reports by oh five hundred. It’s oh five hundred now, sir.

PIKE: Oh, I see. Thank you.

NUMBER ONE: She’s replacing your former yeoman, sir.

PIKE: She does a good job, all right. It’s just that I can’t get used to having a woman on the bridge. No offense, Lieutenant. You’re different, of course.

TYLER: We’ve settled into orbit, sir.

GEOLOGIST: Geological lab report complete, Captain.

SPOCK: Preliminary lab survey ready, sir.

PIKE: Spectography?

GEOLOGIST: Our reading shows an oxygen nitrogen atmosphere, sir, heavy with inert elements but well within safety limits.

PIKE: Gravity?

GEOLOGIST: Zero point nine of Earth.

TYLER: Captain? Reflections, sir, from the planet’s surface. As I read it, they polarize out as rounded metal bits. Could be parts of a spaceship hull.

PIKE: Prep a landing party of six. You feel up to it?

SPOCK: Yes, sir.

TYLER: Yes, sir.

PIKE: Sorry, Number One. With little information on this planet, we’ll have to leave the ship’s most experienced officer here covering us.

NUMBER ONE: Of course, sir.

PIKE: There’s no indication of problems down there, but let’s not take chances.

PITCAIRN: Yes, sir. There’s a canyon to the left. We can set you there completely unobserved.

GARISON: Sir.

OLD MAN: They’re men. They’re humans.

PIKE: Captain Christopher Pike, United Space Ship Enterprise.

HASKINS: Doctor Theodore Haskins, American Continent lnstitute.

SURVIVOR: Is Earth all right?

PIKE: The same old Earth, and you’ll see it very soon.

TYLER: And you won’t believe how fast you can get back. Well, the time barrier’s been broken. Our new ships can…

HASKINS: This is Vina. Her parents are dead. She was born almost as we crashed.

PIKE: Enterprise.

NUMBER ONE: Landing party, come in.

PIKE: We’ll begin transporting the survivors and their effects up to you very shortly.

NUMBER ONE: Quarters are being prepared, sir. Have I permission to send out scouting and scientific parties now?

PIKE: That’s affirmative on the

VINA: You appear to be healthy and intelligent, Captain. A prime specimen.

NUMBER ONE: I didn’t get that last message, Captain.

PIKE: Er, affirmative on request. Landing party out.

HASKINS: You must forgive her choice of words, Captain. She’s lived her whole life with a collection of aging scientists.

BOYCE: If they can spare you a moment, I’d like to make my medical report.

VINA: I think it’s time to show the Captain our secret.

BOYCE: Their health is excellent. Almost too good.

HASKINS: There’s a reason for our condition, but we’ve had some doubt if Earth is ready to learn the secret. Let the girl show you. We’ll accept your judgment.

VINA: You’re tired, but don’t worry. You’ll feel much better soon. Don’t you see it? Here and here.

PIKE: I don’t understand.

VINA: You will. You’re a perfect choice.

TYLER: Captain!

SPOCK: Spock here.

ONE: Landing party, come in.

SPOCK: There is no survivors’ encampment, Number One. This is all some sort of trap. We’ve lost the Captain. Do you read?

PIKE: Can you hear me? My name is Christopher Pike, commander of the space vehicle Enterprise from a stellar group at the other end of this galaxy. Our intentions are peaceful. Can you understand me?

TALOSIAN: It appears, Magistrate, that the intelligence of the specimen is shockingly limited.

MAGISTRATE: This is no surprise, since his vessel was baited here so easily with a simulated message. As you can read in its thoughts, it is only now beginning to suspect that the survivors and encampment were a simple illusion we placed in their minds.

PIKE: You’re not speaking, yet I can hear you.

MAGISTRATE: You will note the confusion as it reads our thought transmissions.

PIKE: All right then, telepathy. You can read my mind. I can read yours. Now, unless you want my ship to consider capturing me an unfriendly act…

MAGISTRATE: You now see the primitive fear threat reaction. The specimen is about to boast of his strength, the weaponry of his vessel, and so on. Next, frustrated into a need to display physical prowess, the creature will throw himself against the transparency.

PIKE: If you were in here, wouldn’t you test the strength of these walls, too? There’s a way out of any cage, and I’ll find it.

MAGISTRATE: Despite its frustration, the creature appears more adaptable than our specimens from other planets. We can soon begin the experiment.

SPOCK: The inhabitants of this planet must live deep underground, and probably manufacture food and other needs down there. Our tests indicate the planet surface, without considerably more vegetation or some animals, simply too barren to support life.

NUMBER ONE: So we just thought we saw survivors there, Mister Spock.

SPOCK: Exactly. An illusion placed in our minds by this planet’s inhabitants.

BOYCE: It was a perfect illusion. They had us seeing just what we wanted to see, human beings who’d survived with dignity and bravery, everything entirely logical, right down to the building of the camp, the tattered clothing, everything. Now let’s be sure we understand the danger of this. The inhabitants of this planet can read our minds. They can create illusions out of a person’s own thoughts, memories, and experiences, even out of a person’s own desires. Illusions just as real and solid as this table top and just as impossible to ignore.

NUMBER ONE: Any estimate what they might want one of us for?

SPOCK: They may simply be studying the Captain, to find out how Earth people are put together. Or it could be something more.

TYLER: Then why aren’t we doing anything? That entry may have stood up against hand lasers, but we can transmit the ship’s power against it. Enough to blast half a continent.

SPOCK: Look. Brains three times the size of ours. If we start buzzing about down there, we’re liable to find their mental power is so great they could reach out and swat this ship as though it were a fly.

TYLER: It’s Captain Pike they’ve got. He needs help, and he probably needs it fast.

NUMBER ONE: Engineering deck will rig to transmit ship’s power. We’ll try blasting through that metal.

TALOSIAN: Thousands of us are already probing the creature’s thoughts, Magistrate. We find excellent memory capacity.

MAGISTRATE: I read most strongly a recent death struggle in which it fought to protect its life. We will begin with this, giving the specimen something more interesting to protect.

VINA: Come on, we must hide ourselves. Come, come. Hurry. It’s deserted. There’ll be weapons and perhaps food.

PIKE: This is Rigel Seven.

VINA: Please, we must hide ourselves.

PIKE: I was in a cage, a cell, in some kind of a zoo. I must still be there.

VINA: Come on.

PIKE: They’ve reached into my mind and taken the memory of somewhere I’ve been.

VINA: The killer!

PIKE: It’s starting just as it happened two weeks ago. Except for you.

PIKE: Longer hair, different dress, but it is you, the one the survivors called Vina. Or rather the image of Vina. But why you again? Why didn’t they create a different girl?

VINA: Quick. If you attack while it’s not looking…

PIKE: But it’s only a dream.

VINA: You have to kill him as you did here before.

PIKE: You can tell my jailers I won’t go along with it. I’m not an animal performing for its supper.

VINA: It doesn’t matter what you call this, you’ll feel it. That’s what matters. You’ll feel every moment of whatever happens to you. Please, don’t you know what he’ll do to us?

PIKE: Why would an illusion be frightened?

VINA: Because that’s the way you imagined me.

PIKE: Who are you? You act as if this were really you.

VINA: Careful.

VINA: It’s over.

PIKE: Why are you here?

VINA: To please you.

PIKE: Are you real?

VINA: As real as you wish.

PIKE: No, no. No, that’s not an answer. I’ve never met you before, never even imagined you.

VINA: Perhaps they made me out of dreams you’ve forgotten.

PIKE: What, and dress you in the same metal fabric they wear?

VINA: I have to wear something, don’t I? I can wear whatever you wish, be anything you wish.

PIKE: So they can see how their specimen performs? They want to see how I react, is that it?

VINA: Don’t you have a dream, something you’ve always wanted very badly?

PIKE: Or do they do more than just watch me? Do they feel with me, too?

VINA: You can have whatever dream you want. I can become anything, any woman you’ve ever imagined. You can have anything you want in the whole universe. Let me please you.

PIKE: Yes. Yes, you can please me. You can tell me about them. Is there any way I can keep them from probing my mind, from using my thoughts against me? Does that frighten you? Does that mean there is a way?

VINA: You’re a fool.

PIKE: Since you’re not real, there’s not much point in continuing this conversation, is there?

NUMBER ONE: All circuits engaged, Mister Spock.

SPOCK: Standing by, Number One.

NUMBER ONE: Take cover.

SPOCK: Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one.

NUMBER ONE: Increase to full power! Can you give us any more?

SPOCK: Our circuits are beginning to heat. We’ll have to cease power.

NUMBER ONE: Disengage. The top of that knoll should have been sheared off the first second.

BOYCE: Maybe it was. It’s what I tried to explain in the briefing room. Their power of illusion is so great, we can’t be sure of anything we do, anything we see.

VINA: Perhaps if you asked me some questions, I could answer.

PIKE: How far can they control my mind?

VINA: If I tell you, then will you pick some dream you’ve had and let me live it with you?

PIKE: Perhaps.

VINA: They can’t actually make you do anything you don’t want to do.

PIKE: But they try to trick me with their illusions.

VINA: And, they can punish you when you’re not co-operative. You’ll find out about that.

PIKE: Did they ever live on the surface of this planet? Why did they go underground?

VINA: War, thousands of centuries ago.

PIKE: That’s why it’s so barren up there?

VINA; The planet’s only now becoming able to support life again.

PIKE: So the Talosians who came underground found life limited here and they concentrated on developing their mental power.

VINA: But they found it’s a trap. Like a narcotic. Because when dreams become more important than reality, you give up travel, building, creating. You even forget how to repair the machines left behind by your ancestors. You just sit, living and reliving other lives left behind in the thought record.

PIKE: Or sit probing minds of zoo specimens like me.

VINA: You’re better than a theatre to them. They create the illusion for you, they watch you react, feel your emotions. They have a whole collection of specimens, descendants of life brought back long ago from all over this part of the galaxy.

PIKE: Which means they had to have more than one of each animal.

VINA: Please.

PIKE: They’ll need a pair of humans, too. Where do they get intend to get the Earth woman?

VINA: You said that if I answered questions…

PIKE: But that was a bargain with something that didn’t exist. You said you weren’t real, remember?

VINA: I’m a woman as real and as human as you are. We’re like Adam and Eve. If we– Don’t. Please don’t punish me!

MAGISTRATE: The vial contains a nourishing protein complex.

PIKE: Is the keeper actually communicating with one of his animals?

MAGISTRATE: If the form and the color is not appealing, it can appear as any food you wish to visualize.

PIKE: And if I prefer–

MAGISTRATE: To starve? You overlook the unpleasant alternative of punishment. From a fable you once heard in childhood. You will now consume the nourishment.

PIKE: Why not just put irresistible hunger in my mind? Because you can’t, can you? You do have limitations, don’t you?

MAGISTRATE: If you continue to disobey, from deeper in your mind, there are things even more unpleasant.

PIKE: That’s very interesting.

MAGISTRATE: Now to the female.

PIKE: You were startled. Weren’t you reading my mind then?

MAGISTRATE: As you’ve conjectured, an Earth vessel did crash on our planet, but with only a single survivor.

PIKE: No, let’s stay on the first subject. All I wanted for that moment was to get my hands around your neck.

MAGISTRATE: We repaired the survivor’s injuries and found the species interesting.

PIKE: Do primitive thoughts put up a block you can’t read through?

MAGISTRATE: It became necessary to attract a mate.

PIKE: All right, all right, let’s talk about the girl. You seem to be going out of your way to make her attractive, to make me feel protective.

MAGISTRATE: This is necessary in order to perpetuate the species.

PIKE: It seems more important to you now that I begin to accept her and like her.

MAGISTRATE: We wish our specimens to be happy in their new life.

PIKE: Assuming that’s a lie, why would you want me attracted to her? So I’ll feel love in a husband-wife relationship? That would be necessary only if you intend to build a family group or perhaps a whole human community.

MAGISTRATE: With the female now properly conditioned…

PIKE: You mean properly punished! I’m the one who’s not co-operating! Why don’t you punish me?

MAGISTRATE: First, an emotion of protectiveness. Now one of sympathy. Excellent.

VINA: You want some coffee, dear? I left the thermos hooked to my saddle.

PIKE: Tango! You old devil, you. I’m sorry I don’t have any sugar. Well, they think of everything, don’t they?

VINA: Hey, your coffee. Is it good to be home?

PIKE: They read our minds very well. Home, anything else I want, if I co-operate, is that it?

VINA: Have you forgotten my headaches, darling? I get them when you talk strangely like this.

PIKE: Look, I’m sorry they punish you, but we can’t let them–

VINA: My, it turned out to be a lovely day, didn’t it?

PIKE: It’s funny. It’s about twenty four hours ago I was telling the ship’s doctor how much I wanted something else not very different from what we have here. An escape from reality. Life with no frustrations. No responsibilities. Now that I have it, I understand the doctor’s answer.

VINA: I hope you’re hungry. These little white sandwiches are your mother’s recipe for chicken tuna.

PIKE: You either live life, bruises, skinned knees and all, or you turn your back on it and start dying. The doctor’s going to be happy about one part, at least. He said I needed a rest.

VINA: This is a lovely place to rest.

PIKE: I used to ride through here when I was a kid. It’s not as pretty as some of the parkland around the big cities, but. That’s Mojave. That’s where I was born.

VINA: Is that supposed to be news to your wife? You’re home. You can even stay if you want. Wouldn’t it be nice showing your children where you once played?

PIKE: These headaches, they’ll be hereditary you know. Would you wish them on a child or a whole group of children?

VINA: Foolish.

PIKE: Is it? Look, first they made me protect you and then feel sympathy for you. Now we have these familiar surroundings and a comfortable husband-wife relationship. They don’t need all this for just passion. What they’re after is respect and mutual dependence.

VINA: They say in the olden days all this was a desert. Blowing sand and cactus.

PIKE: But we’re not here, neither of us. We’re in a menagerie, a cage!

VINA: No.

PIKE; I can’t help either one of us if you won’t give me a chance. Now, you told me once they used illusions as a narcotic. They couldn’t repair the machines left by their ancestors. Is that why they want us, to build a colony of slaves?

VINA: Stop it. Don’t you care what they’ll do to us?

PIKE: Back in my cage, it seemed for a couple of minutes that our keeper couldn’t read my thoughts. Do emotions like hate, keeping hate in your mind, does that block off our mind from them?

VINA: Yes. They can’t read through primitive emotions. But you can’t keep it up for long enough. I’ve tried. They keep at you and at you year after year, tricking and punishing, and they won. They own me. I know you must hate me for that.

PIKE: Oh, no. I don’t hate you. I can guess what it was like.

VINA: But that’s not enough. Don’t you see? They read my thoughts, my feelings, my dreams of what would be a perfect man. That’s why they picked you. I can’t help but love you and they expect you to feel the same way.

PIKE: If they can read my mind, then they know I’m attracted to you.

PIKE: I was from the very first moment I saw you in the survivor’s camp.

TALOSIAN: A curious species. They have fantasies they hide even from themselves.

VINA: I’m beginning to see why none of this has worked for you. You’ve been home, and fighting as on Rigel. That’s not new to you, either. A person’s strongest dreams are about what he can’t do. Yes, a ship’s captain, always having to be so formal, so decent and honest and proper. You must wonder what it would be like to forget all that.

OFFICER: Nice place you have here, Mister Pike.

PIKE: Vina?

ORION: Glistening green. Almost like secret dreams a bored ship captain might have.

OFFICER: Funny how they are on this planet. They actually like being taken advantage of. Suppose you had all of space to choose from, and this was only one small sample.

ORION: Wouldn’t you say it was worth a man’s soul?

SPOCK: We’ve located a magnetic field that seems to come from their underground generator.

GARISON: Could that be an illusion too?

NUMBER ONE: Now, you all know the situation. We’re hoping to transport down inside the Talosian community.

SPOCK: If our measurements and readings are an illusion also, one could find oneself materialized inside solid rock.

NUMBER ONE: Nothing will be said if any volunteer wants to back out.

SPOCK: The women!

NUMBER ONE: Captain! Captain.

VINA: No! Let me finish!

NUMBER ONE: But we were a party of six.

COLT: We were the only ones transported.

VINA: It’s not fair. You don’t need them.

PIKE: They don’t work.

NUMBER ONE: They were fully charged when we left. It’s dead. I can’t make a signal. What is it?

PIKE: Don’t say anything. I’m filling my mind with a picture of beating their huge, misshapen heads to pulp, thoughts so primitive they black out everything else. I’m filling my mind with hate.

VINA: How long can you block your thoughts? A few minutes, an hour? How can that help?

COLT: Leave him alone.

VINA: He doesn’t need you. He’s already picked me.

COLT: Picked her? For what? I don’t understand.

VINA: Now, there’s a fine choice for intelligent offspring.

COLT: Offspring, as in children?

NUMBER ONE: Offspring as in he’s Adam, is that it?

VINA: You’re no better choice. They’d have more luck crossing him with a computer.

NUMBER ONE: Well, shall we do a little time computation? There was a Vina listed on that expedition as an adult crewman. Now, adding eighteen years to your age then…

VINA: It’s not fair. I did what you asked.

MAGISTRATE: Since you resist the present specimen, you now have a selection.

PIKE: I’ll break out of this zoo somehow and get to you. Is your blood red like ours? I’m going to find out.

MAGISTRATE: Each of the two new specimens has qualities in her favor. The female you call Number One has the superior mind and would produce highly intelligent children. Although she seems to lack emotion, this is largely a pretense. She has often has fantasies involving you.

PIKE: All I want to do is get my hands on you. Can you read these thoughts? Images of hate, killing?

MAGISTRATE: The other new arrival has considered you unreachable but now is realizing this has changed. The factors in her favor are youth and strength, plus unusually strong female drives.

PIKE: You’ll find my thoughts more interesting. Thoughts so primitive you can’t understand. Emotions so ugly.

MAGISTRATE: Wrong thinking is punishable. Right thinking will be as quickly rewarded. You will find it an effective combination.

NUMBER ONE: Captain.

PIKE: No. No, don’t help me. I have to concentrate. They can’t read through hate.

SPOCK: Address intercraft.

GARISON: Open, sir.

SPOCK: This is the acting captain speaking. We have no choice now but to consider the safety of this vessel and the remainder of the crew. We’re leaving. All decks prepare for hyperdrive. Time warp factor.

TYLER: Mister Spock, the ship’s controls have gone dead.

SPOCK: Engine room!

GARISON: Open.

SPOCK: Mister Spock here. Switch to rockets. We’re blasting out.

PITCAIRN: All systems are out, bridge. We’ve got nothing.

TYLER: There’s nothing. Every system aboard is fading out.

PIKE: Now you hold still, or I’ll break your neck.

VINA: Don’t hurt them. They don’t mean to be evil.

PIKE: I’ve had some samples of how good they are. You stop this illusion, or I’ll twist your head off. All right, now you try one more illusion, you try anything at all, and I’ll break your neck.

MAGISTRATE: Your ship. Release me or we’ll destroy it.

SPOCK: Nothing. But for the batteries we’d lose gravitation and oxygen.

TYLER: The computers! I can’t shut it off. It’s running through our library. Tapes, micro-records, everything. It doesn’t make sense.

SPOCK: Could be we’ve waited too long. It’s collecting all the information stored in this fly. They’ve decided to swat us.

VINA: He’s not bluffing, Captain. With illusion they can make your crew work the wrong controls or push any button it takes to destroy your ship.

PIKE: I’m going to gamble you’re too intelligent to kill for no reason at all. On the other hand, I’ve got a reason. I’m willing to bet you’ve created an illusion this laser is empty. I think it just blasted a hole in that window and you’re keep us from seeing it. You want me to test my theory out on your head?

COLT: Captain.

PIKE: Make contact, Number One.

NUMBER ONE: They kept us from seeing this, too. We cut through and never knew it. Captain.

MAGISTRATE: As you see, your attempt to escape accomplished nothing.

PIKE: I want to contact our ship.

MAGISTRATE: You are now on the surface where we wished you to be. With the female of your choice, you will now begin carefully guided lives.

PIKE: And start by burying you?

MAGISTRATE: That is your choice. To help you reclaim the planet’s surface, our zoological gardens will furnish a variety of plant life.

PIKE: Look, I’ll make a deal with you. You and your life for the lives of these two Earth women.

MAGISTRATE: Since our lifespan is many times yours, we have time to evolve you into a society trained to serve as artisans, technicians…

PIKE: Do you understand what I’m saying? You give me proof that our ship is all right, send these two back, and I’ll stay with Vina.

NUMBER ONE: It’s wrong to create a whole race of humans to live as slaves.

MAGISTRATE: Is this a deception? Do you intend to destroy yourselves?

VINA: What is that?

PIKE: The weapon is building up an overload. A force chamber explosion. You still have time to get underground. Well, go on! Just to show you how primitive humans are, Talosian, you go with her.

VINA: If, if you all think it’s this important, then I can’t go either. I suppose if they have one human being, they might try again.

PIKE: Wait.

TALOSIAN: Their method of storing records is crude and consumed much time. Are you prepared to assimilate it?

MAGISTRATE: We had not believed this possible. The customs and history of your race show a unique hatred of captivity. Even when it’s pleasant and benevolent, you prefer death. This makes you too violent and dangerous a species for our needs.

VINA: He means that they can’t use you. You’re free to go back to the ship.

PIKE: And that’s it? No apologies? You captured one of us, threatened all of us.

TALOSIAN: Your unsuitability has condemned the Talosian race to eventual death. Is this not sufficient?

MAGISTRATE: No other specimen has shown your adaptability. You were our last hope.

PIKE: But wouldn’t some form of trade, mutual co-operation?

MAGISTRATE: Your race would learn our power of illusion and destroy itself too.

NUMBER ONE: Captain, we have transporter control now.

PIKE: Let’s get back to the ship.

VINA: I can’t. I can’t go with you.

PITCAIRN: Sir, it just came on. We can’t shut the power off.

SPOCK: Mister Spock here.

TYLER: All power has come on, Mister Spock. The helm is answering to control.

GARISON: The captain?

VINA: You see why I can’t go with you.

MAGISTRATE: This is the female’s true appearance.

VINA: They found me in the wreckage, dying. A lump of flesh. They rebuilt me. Everything works. But they had never seen a human. They had no guide for putting me back together.

MAGISTRATE: It was necessary to convince you her desire to stay is an honest one.

PIKE: You’ll give her back her illusion of beauty?

MAGISTRATE: And more.

MAGISTRATE: She has an illusion and you have reality. May you find your way as pleasant.

PITCAIRN: Mister Spock, the system is coming on again.

COLT: What’s happened to Vina?

NUMBER ONE: Isn’t she coming with us?

PIKE: No. No, and I agreed with her reasons.

BOYCE: Hold on a minute.

PIKE: Oh, I feel fine, just fine.

BOYCE: You look a hundred percent better.

PIKE: You recommended a rest, a change of pace, didn’t you? I’ve even been home. Does that make you happy?

PIKE: Yeoman.

COLT: Yes, sir.

PIKE: I thought I told you that when I’m on the bridge, I– Oh. Oh yes. The reports. Thank you.

COLT: Sir, I was wondering. Just curious. Who would have been Eve?

NUMBER ONE: Yeoman! You’ve delivered your report.

COLT: Yes, ma’am. Yes, sir.

TYLER: Eve, sir? Yes, sir.

BOYCE: Eve as in Adam?

PIKE: As in all ship’s doctors are dirty old men. What are we running here, a cadet ship, Number One? Are we ready or not?

NUMBER ONE: All decks show ready, sir.

PIKE: Engage.

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Transcripts taken from Chrissie’s Transcripts Site and modified.

Star Trek Transcripts

Posted on August 7, 2023August 11, 2023 by TvMegasite Admin

Star Trek Transcripts

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General Hospital 2022 Archived Daytime Transcripts

Posted on December 26, 2021January 2, 2023 by TvMegasite Admin

2022 GH Daily Transcripts

General Hospital Logos animated GIF

Transcripts provided by Suzanne

January 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Jan. 3	Jan. 4	Jan. 5	Jan. 6	Jan. 7
Jan. 10	Jan. 11	Jan. 12	Jan. 13	Jan. 14
Jan. 17	Jan. 18	Jan. 19	Jan. 20	Jan. 21
Jan. 24	Jan. 25	Jan. 26	Jan. 27	Jan. 28
Jan. 31

February 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Feb. 1	Feb. 2	Feb. 3	Feb. 4
Feb. 7	Feb. 8	Feb. 9	Feb. 10	Feb. 11
Feb. 14	Feb. 15	Feb. 16	Feb. 17	Feb. 18
Feb. 21	Feb. 22	Feb. 23	Feb. 24	Feb. 25
Feb. 28

March 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Mar. 1	Mar. 2	Mar. 3	Mar. 4
Mar. 7	Mar. 8	Mar. 9	Mar. 10	Mar. 11
Mar. 14	Mar. 15	Mar. 16	Mar. 17	Mar. 18
Mar. 21	Mar. 22	Mar. 23	Mar. 24	Mar. 25
Mar. 28	Mar. 29	Mar. 30	Mar. 31

April 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
				Apr. 1
Apr. 4	Apr. 5	Apr. 6	Apr. 7	Apr. 8
Apr. 11	Apr. 12*	Apr. 13	Apr. 14	Apr. 15
Apr. 18	Apr. 19	Apr. 20	Apr. 21	Apr. 22
Apr. 25	Apr. 26	Apr. 27	Apr. 28	Apr. 29

May 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
May 2	May 3	May 4	May 5	May 6
May 9	May 10	May 11	May 12	May 13
May 16	May 17	May 18	May 19	May 20
May 23	May 24	May 25	May 26*	May 27
May 30*	May 31

June 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
		Jun. 1	Jun. 2	Jun. 3
Jun. 6	Jun. 7	Jun. 8	Jun. 9	Jun. 10
Jun. 13	Jun. 14	Jun. 15	Jun. 16*	Jun. 17
Jun. 20	Jun. 21*	Jun. 22	Jun. 23*	Jun. 24
Jun. 27	Jun. 28*	Jun. 29	Jun. 30

July 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
				Jul. 1
Jul. 4*	Jul. 5	Jul. 6	Jul. 7	Jul. 8
Jul. 11	Jul. 12*	Jul. 13	Jul. 14	Jul. 15
Jul. 18	Jul. 19	Jul. 20	Jul. 21	Jul. 22*
Jul. 25	Jul. 26	Jul. 27	Jul. 28	Jul. 29

August 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Aug. 1	Aug. 2	Aug. 3	Aug. 4	Aug. 5
Aug. 8	Aug. 9	Aug. 10	Aug. 11	Aug. 12
Aug. 15	Aug. 16	Aug. 17	Aug. 18	Aug. 19
Aug. 22	Aug. 23	Aug. 24	Aug. 25	Aug. 26
Aug. 29	Aug. 30	Aug. 31

September 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
			Sep. 1	Sep. 2
Sep. 5	Sep. 6	Sep. 7	Sep. 8*	Sep. 9
Sep. 12	Sep. 13	Sep. 14	Sep. 15	Sep. 16
Sep. 19	Sep. 20	Sep. 21	Sep. 22	Sep. 23
Sep. 26	Sep. 27	Sep. 28	Sep. 29	Sep. 30

October 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Oct. 3	Oct. 4	Oct. 5	Oct. 6	Oct. 7*
Oct. 10	Oct. 11	Oct. 12	Oct. 13*	Oct. 14
Oct. 17	Oct. 18	Oct. 19	Oct. 20	Oct. 21
Oct. 24	Oct. 25	Oct. 26	Oct. 27	Oct. 28
Oct. 31

November 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Nov. 1	Nov. 2	Nov. 3	Nov. 4
Nov. 7	Nov. 8	Nov. 9	Nov. 10	Nov. 11
Nov. 14	Nov. 15	Nov. 16	Nov. 17	Nov. 18
Nov. 21	Nov. 22	Nov. 23	Nov. 24*	Nov. 25*
Nov. 28	Nov. 29	Nov. 30

December 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
			Dec. 1	Dec. 2
Dec. 5	Dec. 6	Dec. 7	Dec. 8	Dec. 9
Dec. 12	Dec. 13	Dec. 14	Dec. 15	Dec. 16
Dec. 19	Dec. 20	Dec. 21	Dec. 22	Dec. 23
Dec. 26	Dec. 27	Dec. 28	Dec. 29	Dec. 30

*Did not air (July 4th was a re-run to the holidays)

**will be late

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Director/singer Phideaux Alexander with some of the GH cast

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Days of Our Lives 2022 Archived Daytime Transcripts

Posted on December 26, 2021January 25, 2023 by TvMegasite Admin

2022 Days Daily Transcripts

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Transcripts provided by Suzanne

We apologize for the quality of the transcripts and for the fact that they’ll often be late. This is because it’s much harder and takes more time for us to get them from Peacock, and they’re not formatted very well. We do the best we can!

January 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Jan. 3	Jan. 4	Jan. 5	Jan. 6	Jan. 7
Jan. 10	Jan. 11	Jan. 12	Jan. 13	Jan. 14
Jan. 17	Jan. 18	Jan. 19	Jan. 20	Jan. 21
Jan. 24	Jan. 25	Jan. 26	Jan. 27	Jan. 28
Jan. 31

February 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Feb. 1	Feb. 2	Feb. 3	Feb. 4*
Feb. 7*	Feb. 8*	Feb. 9*	Feb. 10*	Feb. 11*
Feb. 14*	Feb. 15*	Feb. 16*	Feb. 17*	Feb. 18*
Feb. 21	Feb. 22	Feb. 23	Feb. 24	Feb. 25
Feb. 28

March 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Mar. 1	Mar. 2	Mar. 3	Mar. 4
Mar. 7	Mar. 8	Mar. 9	Mar. 10	Mar. 11
Mar. 14	Mar. 15	Mar. 16	Mar. 17	Mar. 18
Mar. 21	Mar. 22	Mar. 23	Mar. 24	Mar. 25
Mar. 28	Mar. 29	Mar. 30	Mar. 31

April 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
				Apr. 1
Apr. 4	Apr. 5	Apr. 6	Apr. 7	Apr. 8
Apr. 11	Apr. 12	Apr. 13	Apr. 14	Apr. 15
Apr. 18	Apr. 19	Apr. 20	Apr. 21	Apr. 22
Apr. 25	Apr. 26	Apr. 27	Apr. 28	Apr. 29

May 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
May 2	May 3	May 4	May 5	May 6
May 9	May 10	May 11	May 12	May 13
May 16	May 17	May 18	May 19	May 20
May 23	May 24	May 25	May 26	May 27
May 30*	May 31

June 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
		Jun. 1	Jun. 2*	Jun. 3*
Jun. 6	Jun. 7	Jun. 8	Jun. 9	Jun. 10
Jun. 13	Jun. 14	Jun. 15	Jun. 16*	Jun. 17*
Jun. 20	Jun. 21	Jun. 22	Jun. 23	Jun. 24
Jun. 27	Jun. 28	Jun. 29	Jun. 30

July 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
				Jul. 1
Jul. 4	Jul. 5	Jul. 6	Jul. 7	Jul. 8
Jul. 11	Jul. 12	Jul. 13	Jul. 14	Jul. 15
Jul. 18	Jul. 19	Jul. 20	Jul. 21	Jul. 22
Jul. 25	Jul. 26	Jul. 27	Jul. 28	Jul. 29

August 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Aug. 1	Aug. 2	Aug. 3	Aug. 4	Aug. 5
Aug. 8	Aug. 9	Aug. 10	Aug. 11	Aug. 12
Aug. 15	Aug. 16	Aug. 17	Aug. 18	Aug. 19
Aug. 22	Aug. 23	Aug. 24	Aug. 25	Aug. 26
Aug. 29	Aug. 30	Aug. 31

September 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
			Sep. 1	Sep. 2
Sep. 5	Sep. 6	Sep. 7	Sep. 8	Sep. 9
Sep. 12	Sep. 13	Sep. 14	Sep. 15	Sep. 16
Sep. 19	Sep. 20	Sep. 21	Sep. 22	Sep. 23
Sep. 26	Sep. 27	Sep. 28	Sep. 29	Sep. 30

October 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Oct. 3	Oct. 4	Oct. 5	Oct. 6	Oct. 7
Oct. 10	Oct. 11	Oct. 12	Oct. 13	Oct. 14
Oct. 17	Oct. 18	Oct. 19	Oct. 20	Oct. 21
Oct. 24	Oct. 25	Oct. 26	Oct. 27	Oct. 28
Oct. 31

November 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Nov. 1	Nov. 2	Nov. 3	Nov. 4
Nov. 7	Nov. 8	Nov. 9	Nov. 10	Nov. 11
Nov. 14	Nov. 15	Nov. 16	Nov. 17	Nov. 18
Nov. 21	Nov. 22	Nov. 23	Nov. 24	Nov. 25
Nov. 28	Nov. 29	Nov. 30

December 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
			Dec. 1	Dec. 2
Dec. 5	Dec. 6	Dec. 7	Dec. 8	Dec. 9
Dec. 12	Dec. 13	Dec. 14	Dec. 15	Dec. 16
Dec. 19	Dec. 20	Dec. 21	Dec. 22	Dec. 23
Dec. 26	Dec. 27	Dec. 28	Dec. 29	Dec. 30

*Did not air

Note: Episodes that air on Peacock need heavy editing, which we haven’t had much time to do…

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Young & The Restless 2022 Archived Daytime Transcripts

Posted on December 26, 2021January 2, 2023 by TvMegasite Admin

2022 Y&R Daily Transcripts

Y&R Logos GIF

Transcripts provided by Suzanne

January 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Jan. 3	Jan. 4	Jan. 5	Jan. 6	Jan. 7
Jan. 10	Jan. 11	Jan. 12	Jan. 13	Jan. 14
Jan. 17	Jan. 18	Jan. 19	Jan. 20	Jan. 21
Jan. 24	Jan. 25	Jan. 26	Jan. 27	Jan. 28
Jan. 31

February 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Feb. 1	Feb. 2	Feb. 3	Feb. 4
Feb. 7	Feb. 8	Feb. 9	Feb. 10	Feb. 11
Feb. 14	Feb. 15	Feb. 16	Feb. 17	Feb. 18
Feb. 21	Feb. 22	Feb. 23	Feb. 24*	Feb. 25
Feb. 28*

March 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Mar. 1	Mar. 2	Mar. 3	Mar. 4
Mar. 7	Mar. 8	Mar. 9	Mar. 10	Mar. 11
Mar. 14	Mar. 15	Mar. 16	Mar. 17*	Mar. 18*
Mar. 21	Mar. 22	Mar. 23	Mar. 24	Mar. 25
Mar. 28	Mar. 29	Mar. 30***	Mar. 31

April 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
				Apr. 1
Apr. 4	Apr. 5	Apr. 6	Apr. 7	Apr. 8
Apr. 11	Apr. 12	Apr. 13	Apr. 14	Apr. 15
Apr. 18	Apr. 19	Apr. 20	Apr. 21	Apr. 22
Apr. 25	Apr. 26	Apr. 27	Apr. 28	Apr. 29

May 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
May 2	May 3	May 4	May 5	May 6
May 9	May 10	May 11	May 12	May 13
May 16	May 17	May 18	May 19	May 20
May 23	May 24	May 25	May 26	May 27
May 30	May 31

June 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
		Jun. 1	Jun. 2	Jun. 3
Jun. 6	Jun. 7	Jun. 8	Jun. 9	Jun. 10
Jun. 13*	Jun. 14	Jun. 15	Jun. 16	Jun. 17
Jun. 20	Jun. 21	Jun. 22	Jun. 23	Jun. 24
Jun. 27	Jun. 28	Jun. 29	Jun. 30

July 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
				Jul. 1
Jul. 4	Jul. 5	Jul. 6	Jul. 7	Jul. 8
Jul. 11	Jul. 12	Jul. 13	Jul. 14	Jul. 15
Jul. 18	Jul. 19	Jul. 20	Jul. 21	Jul. 22
Jul. 25	Jul. 26	Jul. 27	Jul. 28	Jul. 29

August 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Aug. 1	Aug. 2	Aug. 3	Aug. 4	Aug. 5
Aug. 8	Aug. 9	Aug. 10	Aug. 11	Aug. 12
Aug. 15	Aug. 16	Aug. 17	Aug. 18	Aug. 19
Aug. 22	Aug. 23	Aug. 24	Aug. 25	Aug. 26
Aug. 29	Aug. 30	Aug. 31

September 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
			Sep. 1	Sep. 2
Sep. 5	Sep. 6	Sep. 7	Sep. 8	Sep. 9
Sep. 12	Sep. 13	Sep. 14	Sep. 15	Sep. 16
Sep. 19	Sep. 20	Sep. 21	Sep. 22	Sep. 23
Sep. 26	Sep. 27	Sep. 28	Sep. 29	Sep. 30

October 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
Oct. 3	Oct. 4	Oct. 5	Oct. 6	Oct. 7
Oct. 10	Oct. 11	Oct. 12	Oct. 13	Oct. 14
Oct. 17	Oct. 18	Oct. 19	Oct. 20	Oct. 21
Oct. 24	Oct. 25	Oct. 26	Oct. 27	Oct. 28
Oct. 31

November 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
	Nov. 1	Nov. 2	Nov. 3	Nov. 4
Nov. 7	Nov. 8	Nov. 9	Nov. 10	Nov. 11
Nov. 14	Nov. 15	Nov. 16	Nov. 17	Nov. 18
Nov. 21	Nov. 22	Nov. 23	Nov. 24*	Nov. 25*
Nov. 28	Nov. 29	Nov. 30

December 2022

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday
			Dec. 1	Dec. 2
Dec. 5	Dec. 6	Dec. 7	Dec. 8	Dec. 9
Dec. 12	Dec. 13	Dec. 14	Dec. 15	Dec. 16
Dec. 19	Dec. 20	Dec. 21	Dec. 22	Dec. 23
Dec. 26	Dec. 27	Dec. 28	Dec. 29	Dec. 30*

*Did not air

**will be late

***We’re missing this one and hopefully will get it sometime!

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The Abbotts

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General Hospital Transcripts

Posted on July 18, 2021July 22, 2024 by TvMegasite Admin

GH Daily Transcripts

Josslyn, Kiki, Scott and Bobbie on GH

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Transcripts Run by Suzanne and Jim

GH Transcript Monday 7/22/24

GH Transcript Tuesday 7/23/24

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Carly, Nelle, Zahra and Valentin on GH

Arrow Favorite Quotes: An Innocent Man

Posted on October 10, 2018August 11, 2020 by TvMegasite Admin

Our favorite Arrow Quotes!

104 “An Innocent Man”

Oliver: Found a couple of things.
John: What, archery classes?

Oliver: Starling City is dying. It is being poisoned by a criminal elite who don’t care who they hurt as long as they maintain wealth and power.
John: And what are you gonna do, take them all down by your lonesome?

Laurel: I care about the lives of other people, Oliver. Maybe you should try it sometime.
Oliver: Oh, man.
Thea: That was harsh. You OK?
Oliver: Sure. Second time tonight that a friend of mine has taken me to the woodshed. Kind of tires you out.

Oliver: What am I supposed to do with that? Does that mean “bird”? I don’t speak Chinese!

Oliver: What are you watching?
Thea: Peter Declan.
Oliver: Hmm?
Thea: Oh, a guy who killed his wife. Right. This guy killed his wife in their baby’s room. Psycho.

Thea: So why don’t you make a play? I mean, she did come over here just to make sure you didn’t get shot.
Oliver: There are reasons.
Thea: What are they? Besides you sleeping with her sister and her sister dying and her father hating your guts and you being a jerk to everybody since you’ve been back.
Oliver: Those are the top ones.

Moira: Mr. Diggle’s replacement.
Oliver: Replacement?
Moira: Yes. He tendered his resignation this morning.
Oliver: Did he say why?
Moira: He said he didn’t approve of the way you spend your evenings particularly given that they always begin with you ditching him.

Oliver: Firm grip you got there, Rob.
Rob: That’s five years SWAT with Monument Point MCU.
Oliver: I feel safer already.

Oliver: Say, Rob, I wanna go into town. Could you please get the car for me?
Rob: No offense, but I have been filled in on your tendency to slip the leash. If it’s all the same to you, I’d prefer keeping you in my sights at all times.
Oliver: We’re 20 miles from the city. If you don’t drive me, how else am I gonna get there? Right. I like him.

Joanna: You know, if you go somewhere that’s not work or your home your odds of meeting someone increase by a gazillion percent.
Laurel: Oh, that’s not true. I could still get mugged on the way home.
Joanna: In that case, I hope he’s cute and single.

Moira: Well, it looks like someone forgot a lunch date with his wife.
Walter: What do you mean? Lunch isn’t for another… Forty-five minutes ago. I’m so sorry.

Carly: So when are you gonna tell me?
John: Hmm.
Carly: About what happened to your arm.
John: Oh, it’s my shoulder, and it’s fine.
Carly: I knew that Queen guy was trouble.
John: Hey, I never said this happened protecting Queen.
Carly: Oh, yeah? Then what’s he doing here?
Oliver: Hello, Diggle-sister-in-law Carly. I’m Oliver Queen.
Carly: I know who you are.
John: No, you really don’t.

Oliver: Hello. I couldn’t help but notice a distinct lack of police cars when I got home. I knew you wouldn’t drop a dime on me. So have you considered my offer?
John: Offer? Heh.That’s one hell of a way to put it.

John: Please. You were born with a platinum spoon in your mouth, Queen. What, you spent five years on an island with no room service and suddenly you found religion?

Oliver: I’m gonna go to the washroom, Rob.
John: Oh, that boy is long gone now.

Joanna: You actually think he’s innocent?
Laurel: Someone does.
Joanna: So you said, but you didn’t say was who.
Laurel: A guardian angel.
Joanna: The guy in the hood? Wha– ? You’re kidding.

Laurel: He breaks the law and God knows what else.
Joanna: How are you not afraid that he’s not gonna do “God knows what” to you?
Laurel: He won’t. I don’t know, I can feel it.

Laurel: If what you’re doing isn’t wrong then why are you hiding your face with a hood?
Oliver: To protect the ones I care about.
Laurel: That sounds lonely.
Laurel: It can be.

Walter: I was hoping you could find out some of the details – of the transaction for me.
Felicity: Find out?
Walter: Dig up. Discreetly.
Felicity: I’m your girl. I mean, I’m not your girl. I wasn’t making a pass at you. Thank you for not firing me.

Thea: Oh, my God. What is wrong with your face?
Oliver: What do you mean?
Thea: There’s something really weird on it, like this thing with your mouth. It looks like it’s in the shape of a smile.
Oliver: Yes. That’s cute.
Thea: So why are you grinning?
Oliver: I took your advice with Laurel – to be myself.
Thea: And?
Oliver: It’s helping.
Thea: I got mad relationship skills, bro. Let me know if you need trendy places to propose.
Oliver: I think you’re getting a little bit ahead of yourself. Little bit. Rob! You gotta keep up.

Felicity: The company Mrs. Queen– Er, Steele. Mrs. Queen-Steele. Does she hyphenate? She seems like a woman who would hyphenate.
Walter: Ahem.
Felicity: Right.

Carly: Enough moping.
John: Mm.
Carly: You quit. It’s done. My advice would be to move on.
John: Ah. If it were only that easy.

Moira: You wanted to see me?
Malcolm: You look nervous, Moira.
Moira: Do I have a reason to be?
Malcolm: We all do.
Moira: A modern-day Robin Hood. What? Are you worried that your net worth makes you a target?

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