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103 “Lone Gunmen”
Oliver: What happened? Thea okay?
John: The cops brought her home. She and some of her friends broke into a store tried on some dresses last night. Lit up the breathalyzer like a Christmas tree. So how was your evening, sir?
Oliver: You mean, after I said I had to go bathroom at dinner and never came back?
John: I guess from now on I’ll be watching you pee.
Moira: Last time it was public intoxication. This time breaking and entering. My, how we are moving up in the criminal world.
Thea: Mm. You know, when you pay off the store owner you should check out the merchandise. – They got some pretty killer outfits.
Lucas: Maybe he’s finally figured out there’s easier ways to kill people than with a bow and arrow. Uh, it’s like you said, the guy’s a whack job.
Oliver: So what do you think? Great spot for a nightclub or what?
Tommy: Sweet. Though, I gotta tell you, man, f you’re thinking calling it Queens, I don’t think you’re gonna get the clientele you were hoping for.
Oliver: Private office?
Tommy: For the private one-on-one meetings, I would imagine.
Oliver: Hopefully the occasional two-on-one meeting.
Tommy: [Laughs]
Tommy: How about tomorrow night, the two of us go and scope out the competition? There’s a new club opening downtown. It’s called Poison. Max Fuller owns it.
Oliver: Max Fuller.
Tommy: Mm-hm.
Oliver: I slept with his fiancee.
Tommy: Yeah, before the wedding.
Oliver: It was at rehearsal dinner.
Tommy: The rehearsal dinner is technically before the wedding, right? Ha, ha.
Oliver: Ha, ha.
Tommy: And besides, who stays mad at a castaway?
John: Well, this is the Glades, right? Your rich white friends wouldn’t come to this neighborhood on a bet.
Laurel: Joanna, I’m over him.
Joanna: [Scoffs]
Laurel: And you don’t believe me.
Joanna: Well, I would have if I wouldn’t have just caught you trolling for articles on him!
Laurel: I wasn’t trolling!
Joanna: Okay. That’s gotta stop. So we are going out tonight. And– and we are gonna have some shots, and we are gonna dance with men that we don’t know, and we are gonna stay out way too late.
Laurel: I really don’t think I can go out tonight.
Joanna: It is adorable that you actually think I’m giving you a choice.
Thea: Grounded? I’ve never been grounded.
Moira: Well, you’ve never committed larceny before.
Alexei: First, we will drink to each other’s health then I will look into the identity of this man you seek. Aah. I will also confirm that you are really Bratva captain. Should this not be the case, I will send my mechanic here to find you and kill you and your family.
Bouncer: I don’t see your name on the list.
John: Mr. Queen.
Oliver: Oh. I have never seen this guy before in my life. Ever.
Tommy: Oh, wow. Doesn’t you going out and having fun violate some kind of law? You know, like the ones that are carved on a stone tablet?
Laurel: That’s cute, Tommy.
Tommy: Thanks.
Tommy: You wanna get to him? You’ve gotta go through me. Wow, they are probably gonna go through me.
Laurel: So is this over, Max? Or are you gonna have your boys pound on me next?
Tommy: The girl’s pretty cute.
John: That’s my sister-in-law.
Tommy: Who I will never speak to or look at…Ever. Gonna grab a booth.
Carly: So sweet of you to adopt two white boys. They need a good role model.
Tommy: Look, man about Laurel. I was gonna tell you. I was just trying to figure out the right way.
Oliver: To tell somebody that you slept with their girlfriend after they went missing and were then presumed dead. What, there’s no greeting card for that?
[Both chuckle]
Oliver: No, Mr. Queen was my father.
Felicity: Right, but he’s dead. I mean, he drowned. You didn’t, which means you could come down to the IT Department and listen to me babble. Which Will end. In 3…2…1.
Oliver: Having trouble with my computer and they told me that you were the person to come and see. I was at my coffee shop surfing the web and I spilt a latte on it.
Felicity: Really?
Oliver: Yeah.
Felicity: Because these look like bullet holes.
Oliver: My coffee shop is in a bad neighborhood.
Felicity: Look, I don’t wanna get in the middle of some Shakespearean family drama thing.
Oliver: What?
Felicity: Mr. Steele marrying your mom. Claudius, Gertrude… Hamlet?
Oliver: I didn’t study Shakespeare at any of the four schools that I dropped out of.
Tommy: I wanted to talk to you about last night.
Laurel: You mean how I saved your asses? You’re welcome.
Tommy: Okay, first of all, we shall never, ever speak of that ever again. Secondly, I think you know that I meant the other thing.
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