Author: Eva Diaz

Best Lines provided by Eva

Phyllis: Hey. Why are you still here? I thought Victoria scraped you off of the bottom of her shoe.

Ashland: Beat it, Phyllis.

Phyllis: Not beating it. I can be here.

Ashland: Yeah. Okay, fine. I admit I am not the guy who decides who comes and goes in this park. In fact, I don’t decide much of anything these days.

Phyllis: It must suck reaping what you sow.

Ashland: Boy, you really are enjoying gloating over my downfall, aren’t you?

Phyllis: I am.

Ashland: Oh.

Phyllis: I actually am. Yeah. What are you doing here? Honestly, I thought Victoria got rid of you. And I’m really impressed with her. Maybe I’ll give her a party at the Grand Phoenix for getting rid of you professionally and personally.

Ashland: That is a fantastic idea. You should get on that right now

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Ashland: My gosh, just look at you. Is it possible you’ve grown like a foot since the last time I saw you?

Harrison: Maybe.

Ashland: Oh, then that means I’ve been away for way too long. I-I — I’m so sorry that we haven’t been able to spend more time together.

Harrison: I miss you, father.

Ashland: I miss you too, son. I’ve just been… I’ve been traveling. I’ve been very busy.

Harrison: With work?

Ashland: Yeah. Yeah. And I may have to leave again soon, so I’m really glad that I’m seeing you right now.

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Allie: Hi.

Noah: Oh, there she is, Jabot’s number-one new intern.

Allie: Oh, stop. I just started. It is too soon to say that.

Noah: Well, I got confidence in you. How was your first day?

Allie: Oh, my gosh, it was so fantastic. I loved, loved, loved orientation. They were so thorough.

[ Sighs ] I can’t wait to start working on the projects in the lab.

Noah: Yeah, I mean, sounds exciting. Chemicals and beakers and all that stuff.

Allie: You have not done chemistry since high school, have you?

Noah: No, no, I have not, but I’m trying my best to act like i know what I’m talking about, so if you can just play along, that would be great.

Allie: Okay, okay, well, I am super excited to get practical experience with everything i learned in school. So I’m interested in discovering how science is done in an academic setting versus how it’s done in…

[ Sighs ] I’m sorry.

Noah: What, why are you sorry?

Allie: Here I am going on and on about my fun new internship, and I know you’re not really feeling fulfilled with your career at the moment, so…

Noah: That’s true, but there’s no need to apologize. You know, it’s good that you’re so excited about your new job. That’s what we all want, right? Matter of fact, I think we should celebrate. Would you want to go to dinner with me?

Allie: Oh, sure, yeah, but we could just get something here. I really need a muffin —

Noah: No, Allie, I — I mean like a real dinner.

Allie: Noah Newman, are you asking me out on a date?

Noah: I mean, we — we don’t have to put a label on it if you don’t want to call it that. I just think that we should commemorate your success, and i want to thank you for listening to me about my dilemma with my dad. Talking it out really helped.

Allie: Good, I’m glad. Have you come to a decision? Are you still thinking about leaving New Hope?

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Ashland: You know, in all my years of experience, I’ve found the man who was stripped of everything is the most dangerous.

Victoria: Is that a threat?

Ashland: It’s an observation.

Victoria: You walked in here so calm and deferential ’cause you wanted us to grant you a favor, but now that my father’s refused you, you’re baring your teeth?

Ashland: I’m just saying, if you kick a dog enough times, eventually he will bite back.

Victor: If anyone in my family is bitten by your damn dog, I will kill you myself. Now get out of my sight.

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Summer: I know a little boy who cannot stop talking about wanting to spend more time with you. Hope your new job doesn’t keep you too busy for playdates with Harrison.

Diane: Oh, that all depends on my bosses

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Traci: Hey, Allie. Listen, it’s such a beautiful day out, I think I’m gonna go out in the garden and do some writing. Would you care to join me? Allie?

Allie: Oh, hey, Traci. Sorry. I didn’t know you were here.

Traci: Wow. You were a million miles away.

Allie: Yeah. I get into this hyperfocus mode when I read. I’m sorry.

Traci: Oh, don’t apologize. That’s a fantastic quality in a person. In fact, I owe my entire career to good readers. So, tell me, what has your attention?

Allie: Well, my internship at Jabot starts this afternoon. It’s just orientation, but I wanted to prepare.

Traci: So, you have already started doing research. Wow. At that rate, you’re going to be on the board of directors by next week.

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Billy: Whether it’s a business, a friendship, or a romantic relationship, to me, the key to a successful partnership is compromise and balance — supporting the other person while being honest about each other’s strengths and weaknesses. Now, let me be very clear. I’ve had a few partners who were not shy about pointing out my numerous flaws, and it’s not fun in the moment at all. But ultimately, I do believe that it is a good thing.

[Button clicks] What do you think?

Lily: I mean, I love it. I think it’s great.

Nate: Yeah. I won’t be bringing up Elena’s weaknesses anytime soon.

Devon: Do you do that with Lily?

Billy: No, of course not. Look at her — she’s perfect.

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Nick: Kids were surprised I decided to come back to work here.

Victoria: In a good way, I hope.

Nick: Oh, yeah. Faith told me that as soon as she graduates college, she’s gonna be coming after my job.

Victoria: Well, you better work hard, because my niece is a very smart young lady.

Nick: I’m on notice. You run a tight ship.

Victoria: Seriously, though, I would love to have her here at Newman Enterprises, but I think maybe the management trainee program might be a better place for her to start her career.

Nick: Yeah, that’s more like it.

Victoria: But I like it very much that she’s interested in the family business. I’d love to see the next generation getting involved and coming up through the ranks. If I’ve learned anything this past year it’s that the leadership of this company needs to stay in Newman hands.

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Adam: Well, this must be the happiest day of your life.

Billy: It’s up there. You know, this has got to sting. Your plan to get rid of Locke cost you half a billion dollars, and it didn’t work. Needed your sister to come in and clean things up for you. You must be in a world of hurt. You’ve got your back up against the wall.

Adam: That’s right, I do. But you, of all people, should know that’s when I’m most dangerous. So, I probably wouldn’t push me, Billy.

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Ashland: Oh. Hello, Adam.

Adam: [Clears throat] What are you doing here, Locke? You know, you have some nerve showing your face in Genoa City again.

Ashland: [Chuckles] Well, no one’s ever accused me of being timid.

Adam: Uh-huh. Well, there’s no love lost between us. So why are you chatting me up?

Ashland: You know, i understand how you Newmans always expect me to turn around and flee whenever I run into one of you. But honestly, I just — I don’t want to give you any of you that kind of satisfaction, so…

Adam: So, you came back to town to irritate us?

Ashland: No, no. I actually have a legitimate reason for being here.

Adam: Surely you can’t still be chasing after Victoria. I heard about how she worked you over. You really must be a glutton for punishment.

Ashland: No, no, no. If you must know, I — I left behind some personal belongings when Victoria and i took off for New York City, and I thought I’d stop by the house to pick them up.

Adam: Ah. Well, she may have already given them to charity.

Ashland: Hmm.

Adam: Or put them out on the curb for the trash collector. Or, hey, maybe she already had a good old-fashioned bonfire.

Ashland: I’m sure that’s exactly what’s happened. But speaking of being kicked to the curb, you must feel exactly like that now that Victoria has returned to reclaim her rightful place on the throne.

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Chloe: Hey Sally. Well, nothing was happening until you showed up, and I mean that on five different levels.

Sally: I’d like to take that as a good thing.

Chloe: Oh, it’s great.

Sally: What are you doing?

Chloe: Oh, I’m just having a business meeting with my partner. Can’t you see?

Sally: Is Chelsea late?

Chloe: Yeah, or possibly forgot the whole thing or just chose not to show up.

Sally: I see.

Chloe: Please, please sit down and join me.

Sally: Oh.

Chloe: Um, yeah, I just wanted to congratulate you on your new gig. Thank you. I mean, taking over as CEO at Newman Media — that is a big job. But I know you can do it.

Sally: Thanks, Chloe. Coming from you, that means a lot.

***********************

Victoria: handle the articles of incorporation. We need to be official if we’re gonna make an offer on the place.

Ashland: Agreed.

Victoria: Uh, also — oh, gosh — in order to file the paperwork, we’re gonna need a name, and we haven’t even thought of anything yet.

Ashland: Okay, how about “anything but Newman” incorporated?

Victoria: Ooh, catchy! But I think — honestly, I think we should leave our names out of it.

Ashland: I like “catchy.” How about Catchy Media?

Victoria: My goodness. I thought you would be better at this. Your previous corporation was named after a 3,000-year-old Babylonian king.

Ashland: Excuse me. I had months to come up with that, not five minutes.

Victoria: Okay, fine. What was that phrase that you used about the building?

Ashland: “Save millions.”

Victoria: [Laughs] No. “Hand of destiny.”

Ashland: “Destiny.” Destiny Media. I love that. And I love you.

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Phyllis: Hey Derek, can you do me a favor? Um, and get housekeeping on this right away. Half a bottle of wine and dirty glasses are outside my suite. I don’t want it there. Hard night for someone. I don’t know who left it there. I don’t know. I don’t know. But could you get rid of it? Thanks.

Amanda: Well, hello. So, you run out of town, you leave us in the lurch for the Chancellor-Winters launch party, and then, worst of all, you don’t call, you don’t text.

Phyllis: I know. I’m the worst. Hi.

Amanda: Welcome home.

Phyllis: Aww, thank you. Thank you

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Summer: Mom?

Phyllis: I’m okay.

Summer: No, you’re not.

Phyllis: Yeah, I’m fine Summer. I’m fine. You know what? I want to ask you a question. The job you offered me at Marchetti — is that the same one that Diane’s doing?

Summer: Mom, no, not even close. I wanted you to be my head of marketing. What we offered Diane is a junior-level P.R. Gig. Look, it was Kyle’s idea, and i only agreed to it because I’m here to support Kyle, just like you are here to support me, right?

Phyllis: Yeah. Right. I will support you. I will support you because i love you. Yeah.

Summer: I love you, too.

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Victoria: You deserve an explanation.

Billy: I agree. Thank you.

Victoria: And, honestly, i think that you deserve the truth, as well. The truth is that I had no intention of reconciling with Ashland at all.

Billy: Well, I was hoping that was the case, but why didn’t you just tell me the plan? You know that you can trust me.

Victoria: Is it really a mystery why I wouldn’t want “the grinning soul” to do an entire podcast on clever women who flip the script on their devious and manipulative husbands?

Billy: I’m glad that you are safe and sound and single. You are single, aren’t you?

Victoria: That’s right. I want nothing more to do with Ashland.

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Ashland: Yeah. No, no, no. No need. We’ve had many successes in the past. Peru is not one of them, but you can’t knock it out of the park every time, can you? Although I did think the task was relatively simple — to keep Michael Baldwin down there, to get him thrown in jail, keep him there while I control the narrative here. But it was not meant to be. I still don’t quite understand what went wrong. Perhaps there was some unforeseen exigencies we hadn’t planned for. Or maybe he’s just smarter than we are. I don’t know.

Stannis: I —

Ashland: As I said, no need to explain. But this job I’m offering you right here and right now… will give you a chance to redeem yourself.

Stannis: I assume the target is still Michael Baldwin?

Ashland: Oh, god, no. Let’s not bite off more than we can chew. I can’t expect you to keep up with a wily, third-rate lawyer. No, no, no. This time, the target will be much more manageable, hmm?

[ Bottle slams ] My wife.

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Diane: Oh! It seems we can’t stop running into each other today. What are the odds?

Phyllis: Well, they’re pretty high since you came to my hotel to use the spa. Did you have a good time?

Diane: Oh, yes, I did. And now that I know I’m welcome, I’ll be sure and stop by on a more regular basis.

Phyllis: Well, we’re happy to have you. No need to thank me.

Diane: Thank you for what?

Phyllis: Well, for having an area that provides a friendly face. I mean, I’m sure you’re still getting a very chilly reception from the people in Genoa City.

Diane: Hmm.

Phyllis: People here hold a grudge.

Diane: Well, that’s okay because I have unlimited patience.

Phyllis: Do you?

Diane: Yes. Even if the rest of this town never comes around, I will be just fine — because I’m connecting with my son and my grandson and the Abbotts, especially Jack, who is starting to accept that I will be part of the family.

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Jack: And clearly she’s amused by something.

Allie: Oh, it’s, uh — it’s Noah.

Jack: Noah? Again? Boy, you two are getting pretty close.

Allie: [Chuckles] No, we’re not getting “close,” close. No, no. Oh, you know, what am I saying? I should just stop talking.

[Laughs]

Jack: I get it. I understand.

Allie: No, it just doesn’t feel like a conversation i should be having with my grandfather.

Jack: You know what? I’m just a regular guy. You can talk to me about anything.

Allie: Okay, well, Noah and I — we — we’re hanging out. But that’s all. From tomorrow on, I am gonna be focusing strictly on work.

Jack: Well, I certainly hope not. I hope you’re gonna have some fun, too. Look, I’m sure you’re gonna be a great intern, hardworking and all that, but I don’t want you locked away in a lab. The sun is out. It’s summer. You should be having fun. God knows I did when I was your age.

Allie: Okay, again, this feels like a conversation you shouldn’t be having with your granddaughter.

Jack: Okay, okay. I’ll respect your boundaries. All I’m saying is, if having fun means spending time with Noah or with your friends, I am all for it. For what it’s worth, I think Noah’s a good guy. And I know what you’ve been through, and it makes me happy to see you smile.

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