Tag: Day

Days of Our Lives Best Lines

Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

Xander (to Justin): Well, if it isn’t my traitorous cousin. Just so you know, I’m going to be at Brady’s arraignment.

Ava: Am I uh, consorting with a wanted fugitive?
Brady: Really not in the mood for that.
Ava: Sorry, not funny. I know. I’m sorry. Home? I thought you’d be in jail.
Brady: I should be. Apparently confessing to a crime isn’t enough to get you there.

Justin: Xander seemed pretty upset. I should probably sleep with one eye open tonight huh?
Maggie: Well, I’m sure he’ll calm down. Although it couldn’t hurt to start locking your door just in case.

Melinda (Connie had trouble cutting her food): You know I could help you with that.
Connie: Even on your best day, do you think I’m that stupid?

Johnny (to EJ): You slept with Gabi?! Were you trying to start World War 3?

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

Stefan: I was just trying to convey to you that I was missing you and how hard it was to live without you.
Gabi: Oh, I am so sorry for you. It wasn’t hard for me at all. You were all alone in your big soft bed, but I was lucky. I had a double murder cell mate to keep me company.

Johnny: Grandma?
Hattie: Do I look like a grandma?
Johnny: Uh, well, you certainly look like mine.
Hattie: Sorry kiddo. I don’t have any kids, so I probably don’t have any grandkids either.

Leo (reading from a book): A person suffering from DID may not be aware of what their alters are thinking or experiencing thus each can operate as separate, but distinct personas. Oh my God that describes Dr. Evans to a T. One minute she’s wolfing down pork rinds and calling my hunty, and I’m telling her about the time I thought Andy Cohen was hitting on me at Whole Foods, but it turns out he was just looking for ketchup and he thought I worked there.

Leo: I’ll stage an intervention. It worked for Everett or did it make it worse.

Alex (to Justin about Theresa): It’s gotta be some kind of record. We were married for a whole 30 minutes before it imploded.

Leo: You look and sound exactly like Marlena.
Hattie: Geez, like I haven’t heard that a gazillion times.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

Abe: Your assistant said you were willing to talk
Marlena: Well, I’m always willing to talk

Connie (to Bobby): I know this. I got a perfect record. Whenever I commit a crime, I get away with it.

Stephanie: Eavesdropper. Do you ever get tired of sneaking up on people?
Leo: Are you kidding? It’s a gift and when it’s about Mr. Everett Lynch, I smell a story or at least something that could have a negative impact on me.

Connie: You’re the one who wanted a favor in exchange for keeping your mouth shut about me.
Bobby: Yeah, a favor not a murder.
Connie: What did you think I was going to do when I said I would get rid of him? Gift him a cruise around the world?

Bobby (to Connie): Try not to murder anyone else.

Hattie: You will not regret it.
Kate: I already do.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

Steve: I assume this felony has something to do with me breaking Clyde Weston out of Statesville?
Jada: Are there any other felonies that I should be aware of?
Steve: Not that I can recall

Jada: I have no choice but to formally charge and book you
Steve: It won’t be my first time posing for a mug shot.

Jada: There were two people in hazmat suits who escorted Clyde Weston to safety after that chemical spill. You’ve already admitted that you were one of them. Who was the other?
Steve: Rebecca Goldman. Who else?
Jada: Was it John Black?
Steve: John? No of course not.
Jada: You two are partners.
Steve: We’re partners at Black Patch, but we’re not partners in crime.

Stephanie: I care about Everett.
Bobby: You only care about yourself. You’re such a liar.

Bobby (to Stephanie): You have that annoying personality that thinks she’s always wanted. Don’t you? Let me say something to clear the air about it because it’s not totally getting through. I want nothing to do with you. I find you desperate and pathetic and unattractive. You do nothing for me.

Chad (talking about staring at the footage of the mystery woman): This is going to make me crazier than I already am.

Julie: We don’t need that do we?

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Days of Our Lives Best Lines

Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to John after he got shot)
Steve: How much you think Maggie will bill me for staining her carpet?

Alex: You could have shot Theresa.
Xander: But I didn’t, did I? I hit my target.
Alex: Yeah, you’re lucky you hit your target.
Theresa: I’m luckier.

Xander: I’ve always been an excellent marksman.
Brady: Yeah, Yeah, I’ve got the scar to prove it. Weren’t you the guy that accidentally shot Marlena at her wedding when you were trying to hit my brother Eric.
Xander: Yeah, you have one off day and that’s all anyone remembers.

(when Jada showed up and saw Konstantin’s dead body)
Jada: Who’s gonna start?
Alex: Xander killed him.
Xander: Way to throw me under the bus, cuz.

(about the gun in Xander’s hand)
Jada: Is that the murder weapon?
Xander: Yes, but it’s a bit harsh calling it a murder.

(about Steve getting shot at the wedding)
Stephanie: You were the one who got hit.
Steve: Yeah, I was too slow. Maybe I shouldn’t have skipped that second cup of coffee.

Marlena: Leo, what kind of help do you need?
Leo: Mental health help of course. My brain needs major fixing, but then so does my heart.
Marlena: Well cardiology is one floor up. As far as your brain, you can make an appointment.

(to Marlena)
Leo: I bet in this crazy town you have a line of nuts waiting around the block for your services.

(about Gabi)
Rafe: She’s innocent.
Clyde: Come on, man. The last thing your sister is is innocent.

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Days of Our Lives Best Lines

Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Stefan when he wanted to talk in public)
Kristen: We couldn’t have talked in the mansion with the 52 rooms.

(to Rafe)
Melinda: Anything I discussed with Ms. Peterson is under attorney privilege. I’m sure you heard of it.

(to EJ)
Leo: Make it quick. I have a low tolerance for boredom.

(to Roman when he ignored her)
Kate: I thought bartenders were supposed to be good listeners.

(to Kristen about Melinda not opening Gabi’s case)
Stefan: Do they want a signed confession from Gil from beyond the grave?

Leo: Can you tell me about the specials?
Roman: How about a knuckle sandwich? How’s that sound?

(when Goldman wouldn’t tell Ava and Lucas where Clyde was)
Ava: I guess Montana is as good as a place as any to get rid of a body.

(to Clyde when she was about to shoot him)
Ava: Give my best to the devil.

(when Clyde said Abby was alive)
Chad: What did you say?
Clyde: Did you need me to speak more clearly? Your wife is alive and well in the land of the living.

(when Konstantin said the door at the Horton house was open)
Konstantin: Did you realize no one in Salem lock their doors?

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(about EJ coming after her for taking his job)
Paulina: What’s he gonna do? Put a horsehead in your bed?
Melinda: You never know.

Leo: This lady is not going to blow your whistle.
Holly: Why not?
Leo: You sound disappointed.

(to Kate)
Ava: I think you should know by now since word gets around in this town that I don’t like being threatened.

(to Sloan)
EJ: I wouldn’t turn this into a trashy reality show if I were you.

(to Everett and Stephanie)
Leo: Have you two decided if you’re a thing or a thing thing?

(to Everett and Stephanie when they were talking gibberish)
Leo: Is this some ancient straight person language I know nothing about and don’t want to know about?

(to Theresa when she told him he would find love again)
Brady: Love will find you? You got any more greeting card expressions?

(about the prom)
Theresa: Let’s hope there aren’t any telekinetic kids trying to get revenge.
Brady: This is Salem. They are probably everywhere.

(about Everett getting arrested)
Stephanie: What are you saying? You think Everett got what he deserved?
Chad: Yeah, when you go around punching people in the face.

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Days of Our Lives Best Lines

Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Sloan)
EJ: You weren’t lying. Not this time anyway.

Everett: I’m going to order the hot dog.
Stephanie: You’re going to order the hot dog?
(when Stephanie started laughing)
Everett: Is there something funny about that that I don’t know about?

Eric: You’re a hot mess.
Leo: Zaddy? You’re putting me to bed again? It’s like gayja vu.

(when Leo was upset about Dimitri dumping him)
Leo: Did everything work out for you two?
Nicole: We have both moved on and are happily married to other people
Leo: Sure Jan.

(to Leo)
EJ: You don’t remember letting me in? How many sheets to the wind are you?

Leo: Nicole and Eric were here.
EJ: You don’t remember Nicole and Eric being here?
Leo: I remember because I wanted Nicole to leave so I can be with the salt and pepper…

(to Theresa when he looked up to Victor)
Alex: I forgive you Dad. If I’m looking in the right direction.

(to Stefan)
Kristen: I know that you love Gabi and for the life of me I can’t figure out why.

Sloan: I have been looking all over for you.
Leo: Let me know when you find me.

(to Leo)
Sloan: Guilt is a waste of time. Nobody gets anywhere by suffering.

Rafe: Can we talk?
EJ: I’ll assume I have no choice.

Rafe: The truth is Gabi is innocent.
EJ: Your sister is far from innocent.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Chanel when he was trying to convince her she wasn’t immature)
Johnny: If there’s anyone who’s immature it’s me. My only job title is trust fund baby.

(to herself)
Theresa: They say the best things in life are free, but I just happen to be shallow enough to think a few things are not enough.

(about Konstantin being upset about Maggie donating her money)
Sarah: I was thrown by it.
Xander: Thrown? I was more than thrown. I was appalled.

(when Sophia was upset about her black eye)
Holly: Swelling’s supposed to go up before it goes down.
Sophia: Thank you doctor.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

Paulina: I swear Kayla. Only you can make a haz mat suit look chic.

Roman: You’re back from the monastery.
Kate: Words I bet you never thought you would say to me.
Roman: No, I didn’t.

(about Chanel’s ankle)
Chanel: It hurts when I put pressure on it.
Johnny: Maybe you shouldn’t do that.
Chanel: Why didn’t I think of that?

(to Stefan about being a bartender)
Ava: America loves its riches to rags story.

(to Stefan)
Ava: You’re lucky you have a brother who is the D.A. Those get-out-of-jail-free cards come in handy.

Stefan: I’m unarmed just so you know.
Harris: I’m not just so you know.

(to EJ)
Kristen: Wouldn’t it be entertaining to watch Stefan work?

(about Theresa going to Maggie about the magazine closing)
Theresa: I didn’t not run to Maggie.
Alex: Oh. So you drove there.

(about Tate)
Sophia: He is such a snacky snack. I wish he was on the menu.

(to Stefan)
Kristen: I would give you a nasty look, but you already have one.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Sloan when she said getting a lawyer was a bold move)
Stefan: What can I say? I’m a DiMera. Fearless is in our DNA.

Brady: We will protect you.
Tate: From Holly the teenage vampire.
Theresa: If the fangs fit.

(to Stefan)
Sloan: Let’s discuss my retainer.
(when Stefan hesitated)
Sloan: Not so fearless, are we?

(to Sloan about EJ)
Stefan: I know my brother. There’s no way he won’t turn against me.

Nicole: EJ’s not good at apologizing/
Theresa: Oh boo hoo. Poor EJ.

Eric: Who are you blackmailing these days?
Leo: Who am I not blackmailing that’s the real question.

(when Chad and Thomas were playing a wizard game)
Chad: Calculus is easier than this.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(when Steve brought Kayla flowers)
Kayla: Uh oh! What did you do?

Steve: I hate keeping secrets from you baby.
Kayla: Then don’t.

Ava: Unless you’re going to tell me where you are so I can slit your throat and watch you bleed out, I’m not interested.
Clyde: What’s with the hostility? Take a chill pill mama.

Holly: How’s school? What’s your favorite subject?
Rachel: Lunch.

Tripp: Is there any chance you could be pregnant?
Paulina: Are you going to card me for alcohol too?

(to Everett)
Leo: Since you are clearly singing the blues today, I will steer clear.

(to Everett)
Jada: Are you as stubborn as you are psychotic?

Nicole: Rachel is nothing but an entitled little brat.
Kristen: Rachel is not a brat.
Nicole: Yes, she is. She needs to come with a warning label just like her mother.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Holly)
EJ: Since you’re finally being honest, I trust you’ll tell us the whole story.

(about Holly)
Tate: She’s not a bad person.
Theresa: Oh yeah! Tell that to your ankle monitor.

Ava: Is there anything you can’ t do?
Harris: If there is I haven’t found it yet.

Theresa: What kid wants to stay home with their parents and eat cake?
Brady: I don’t know. I think that chocolate cake is a pretty good reason to hang around.

Paulina: Buckle up Marlena because you’re going to think I’m crazy.
Marlena: That word is not in my vocabulary.

(to Marlena)
Paulina: Answering a question with a question? Is that what they taught you in shrink school?

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

Kristen: Didn’t your mother ever teach you never to keep a girl waiting?
Alex: Six whole minutes?

(about Theresa living with Brady)
Kristen: Does your pea brain grasp how counterproductive that is?
Alex: Look Cruella. I’m not one of your little puppy catchers, so if you want my help with this you better not talk down to me.

(to Sarah about Victoria)
Xander: My daughter’s not going to go anywhere with boys until she’s 27. Even then I’m going to be there with her.

(to Theresa about Kristen being crazy)
Alex: Maybe I like a little crazy in my life. I mean I was with you.

(when Theresa came in the DiMera mansion)
Theresa: Harold let me in. I’m guessing you were too lazy to get up.
Kristen: Well that’s what servants are for.

(to Kristen)
Theresa: This is not 1955. Parents can co-parent kids without being together.

(to Harris about who could have framed Xander for shooting him)
Xander: Unfortunately, Salem is filled with a number of people who would want to do him in. EJ DiMera being at the top of the list.

Priest: Are you here for a confession?
Leo: How much time do you have?

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Stefan when he told him about where he could hide)
EJ: I hear Siberia is wonderful this time of year.

(to Stefan when he wanted to say goodbye to Gabi)
EJ: You walk in there now, you’ll be taken out feet first, but don’t worry. I’ll gladly put the knife through Gabi’s heart on your behalf.

Stefan: You son of a b*tch.
EJ: I’d hold back on the name calling especially since your life is in my hands.

(when Sloan gave Leo his check)
Leo: Fantastic. This isn’t going to bounce, is it?
Sloan: Have my checks ever bounced?
Leo: There’s a first time for everything.

Konstantin: You do want to be rich, don’t you?
Theresa: Who doesn’t?

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Wendy: You guys really saved my life. Mine and Tripp’s.
John: All in a day’s work.
Rafe: Hey. That’s my line.

(about Wendy’s flowers)
Wendy: Your Mom brought those.
Tripp: I got a muffin. You must rate.

Chanel: Mama. You look so much better.
Paulina: Normally I would be offended by that remark, but right now I will take it.

(to Tripp)
Sarah: They say that doctors are the worst patients, but you are in a league of your own.

(when Harris accused EJ of knowing where Stefan was)
EJ: I didn’t know one could develop brain damage after being shot in the chest. You’re out of your mind.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Rafe)
Ava: This is not the day to mess with me. I am a mother whose son is missing.

Julie: You scared me to death.
Everett: Yeah, you give as good as you get.

(to Goldman about Harris being alive)
Clyde: Does this guy have a guardian angel or something?

(to Stefan)
EJ: You should rent out that space between your ears. You would net out a fortune.

(about EJ’s deal)
Stefan: You have my word.
EJ: Your word is worthless, but your signature on a bonding contract is gold.

(to Roman when he said he talked Kate into running a marathon)
Lucas: How is she going to do that? She doesn’t wear sneakers.

(to Leo)
Sloan: You have been draining me dry for weeks. Cheap is not a word I would use to describe you.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(when Johnny said he had news for EJ and Nicole)
EJ: Need we have a stiff drink at the ready for this other news?

Alex: Sorry Ma’am.
Kristen: Ma’am?
Alex: I didn’t know that was you.
Kristen: Now that you do it’s Miss.

Kristen: Are you having a problem with Theresa Jean Donovan.
Alex: Is that what her name is?
Kristen: You two don’t know each other at all.

(when he dropped his keys)
Stephan: Can one frickin’ thing go right?

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

Stefan: Hello all.
Tripp: Hey there. Nice to see you fully dressed.

Stefan: You’re going to forget about what you saw.
Tripp: I wish I could.

(when Stefan asked Ava why she slept with him if she loved Harris)
Ava: What the hell is wrong with you?
Stefan: Lots of things.

(to Kristen)
Brady: It’s okay to do all these rotten things because you love and because you’re afraid to lose me. Is that okay?

(when Sloan gave Eric lingerie for Valentine’s Day)
Eric: I don’t think it’s my size.

(when Leo ran into Eric, Sloan, and Jude)
Leo: Look who’s here. Two of my favorite people and Sloan.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Johnny)
Chanel: If the devil couldn’t keep us apart, the DiMeras sure as hell can’t.

(to Abe after they made love)
Paulina: Are you asking me to rate your performance?

(about Chanel and Johnny getting married)
Abe: Young love.
Paulina: Old timers’ lover ain’t bad either.

(to EJ when he asked where he was last night)
Stefan: You want to know where I was last night. I was on the corner of shut the hell up and none of your business. That’s where I was.

(to Stephanie about Clyde)
Kayla: He needs to go straight to Hell. He’s already halfway there after what he did to Abby.

(to Stefan)
EJ: When all the dusts settles, I’ll be the one on top while you’re off to jail to become someone’s bottom.

(to Kayla)
Stephanie: I hope I don’t have to marry the same guy four times before I get it right.

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Best Lines by Michele and Cheryl

(to Stephanie)
Leo: My my. Girl, you do get around.

Stephanie: Leo, what are you doing here?
Leo: I live in this building, remember? And according to the guest registry which I may or may not take a peek at two times a day, you do not.

Stephanie: This is not what you think.
Leo: So, it’s even better? My imagination is on fire.

Stephanie: Where I spend the night is my business.
Leo: And maybe Lady Whistleblower’s

Johnny: Any coffee left for me?
Stefan: You know where the pot is.

Johnny: Do you know if my dad’s up?
Stefan: Well, Johnny. Since I am my brother’s keeper, I happen to have his minute-by-minute schedule on my phone. Let me check it for you.

Stephanie: Everett and I are colleagues just like you and me.
Leo: Colleagues with benefits.
Stephanie: No just friends
Leo: But Harry and Sally clearly taught us men and women can’t be friends because the sex part gets in the way.

(to Everett)
Leo: Are you alright? You look the before photo of a makeover.

(to Stefan)
What so about what age would you say I need to be before I get the memo that you can always justify cheating on your wife?

Stefan: Is playing hot for me such a chore for you?
Ava: It actually is. You know you’re not as hot as you think you are.

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(to John when his hair was messed up)
Marlena: I love you too. You might want to introduce yourself to a comb.

Xander: It’s so nice having someone else in the house who can cook.
Sarah: Well don’t get too excited. You haven’t had my meal yet.

(When Stephanie said she doesn’t drink much)
Ava: Your little sleepover with Harris.
Stephanie: You mean Harris Michaels?
Ava: You know another Harris?

(to Leo after he suggested seeing Wonka and other movies)
Brady: Thank you for your suggestions. You can oompa lumpa your way out of here.

(to Eric)
Leo: I need some wonderfully flattering photos of myself preferably ones that make me look taller, younger, thinner for Lady Whistleblower’s grand return.

(to Eric)
Leo: This is Salem. There’s always a scandal ready to be exposed.

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(to Everett)
Chad: I bet you’re as sharp with that racket as you are with that broom. Charlotte picked up more trash than you and she’s in pre-school.

(to Sloan)
Leo: Keep in mind that you did promise to pamper me in a manner to which I was becoming very accustomed, and so far, honey your service is like getting two and a half stars from me.

(to Chad and Everett)
Leo: Where’s the confetti? Where are the streamers and banners celebrating the return of Lady Whistleblower?

(to Chad and Everett)
Leo: Well, what do you think? What do you think? I mean, not that I’m desperate for a compliment under accolades and kudos and or praise. Actually I am.

(to Sloan)
Nicole: May I suggest that you pour yourself a large glass of wine before they get there because if you start the night off wired, it’s only going to go downhill from there.

Stefan: What are you thinking?
Ava: Orange is a bad color for me.

(to Ava when she was talking to Harris)
Stefan: From where I was standing, it looked as if you were going to shove the truth and your tongue down his throat.

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