Days of Our Lives Transcript
Transcript provided by Suzanne
THIS STILL NEEDS EXTENSIVE EDITING!
[soft music]
Hey.
Hey, sis.
What are you doing home so early? I thought you had a date with Ava Vitali. Was it the CliffsNotes version of “The Nutcracker”?
Ha. Well, let’s just say that things did not go as planned.
[tense music] [beeping]
Clear the way to the bar cart!
[screams] Oh, my–damn it, EJ. You scared me half to death. Don’t sneak up on me like that.
Walking into a room in the middle of my house hardly qualifies as sneaking up on you.
You didn’t just walk in here. You stomped in here like a herd of elephants.
And you reacted like I just caught you in some nefarious deed, which is somewhat impossible not to catch you in the middle of.
I was just texting, EJ. That’s all.
I somehow doubt that’s all. Tell me, what sort of trouble are you stirring up now, dear sister?
Hmm?
[soft music]
You’re already wrapping presents?
Mm-hmm, and on the home stretch, I am happy to say.
Lucky you. I haven’t even finished my shopping.
Mm, well, you better jump on that, because you know Christmas is right around the corner.
I know. I know. I’ll get it done.
Yeah.
Somehow. [laughs]
Well, look at you. You look nice.
Oh.
What are you all dressed up for?
I’m just going out for drinks.
Oh, yeah? With who? [phone ringing]
Oh, I’m sorry. I have to take that.
Yeah.
Hey, Shawn, what’s up? What? I thought we had her cornered. [sighs] Right. OK, well, keep me posted.
[tense music]
That didn’t sound like good news.
It wasn’t. Shawn got a line on where Hattie Adams had been holed up. But when he got there, she was gone.
You are being tested, Stark. The universe wants to know if you can keep your word, for once, and connect your new friend Doug– charming, though very pushy– with a buyer for this perfect, perfect bijou… oh, and not give in to overwhelming temptation. But you know what? Sometimes, the universe needs to mind its own business, especially when a fella is looking this ravishing. [knocking on door] Who is it?
Hey, Leo. It’s Rafe.
Hello, Rafe. What brings you by? You have some news on Hattie?
Oh, I’ve got something better for you.
Oh.
Not that.
Oh.
But it is a good Christmas present.
[suspenseful music]
[soft orchestration] announcer: Like sands through the hourglass, so are the “Days of Our Lives.”
I’m always hiding things from you, EJ. Surely, you should know that by now. Blood is not equal to trust.
Ooh, you’re lucky he’s not here to hear you say that.
I believe he coined the expression right after the many times you stabbed him in the back.
And, you know, the reason I reacted so badly was because you disturbed my very pleasant, quiet evening.
But you didn’t just “react so badly.” You jumped a mile and then hovered over your phone like it was a nuclear device.
I was guarding my phone because I was conducting business– DiMera business is– which is none of yours.
Eh, suit yourself. I’ve got my own problems.
Such as?
Such as someone just royally screwed up my case against Mark Green.
[tense music]
Huh.
You lost the “Nutcracker” tickets?
Yeah, I lost the “Nutcracker” tickets. I had them in my jacket pocket, I swear to God. And as soon as I got to Ava’s door, they were gone. I don’t know what the hell happened.
OK. Why didn’t you buy a couple more?
They were sold out. That’s my luck. So we decided we would just watch a movie at her place. And then, what do you know? The Wi-Fi went out.
Hmm. Well, it seems like quite the comedy of errors.
Yeah, that’s one way to put it.
Almost seems like something was conspiring against the two of you going out tonight.
Or someone.
[beeping]
Kristen.
Hattie was our prime suspect in the tainted cupcake case. And right when we were getting close, she just–she slips through our fingers.
That’s–that’s too bad.
Yeah, you know, I was– I was banking on bringing her in for questioning tonight, having this case closed by Christmas.
And Shawn said it looked like she had just left, right?
Yeah. He’s keeping an eye on the place, but there’s no guarantee that she’s even going to come back.
Do you think maybe she somehow got wind that you were closing in?
Or maybe your brother got to her first.
– Hattie Adams.
Hmm. Thought I’d never have to see that ugly mug again.
And yet, here you are, still wearing that sickly sweet cologne.
Strawberry almond banana. I love it, and I get lots of compliments on it.
Well, it’s making me want to toss my cookies.
Makes me like it even more.
Ugh. This is a Christmas miracle.
I think it had something to do with my detective skills.
Yes. Yes, of course. You are a detecting savant, and your enviable skills were being wasted at that desk job.
Thank you.
So, Hattie, now that my PI has managed to track you down, it’s time for us to have a little chat about “Body & Soul.”
Long overdue. Dazzle me.
Dazzle you?
Dazzle me. Tell me how you’re going to write me back from the dead. Oh, there’s that stupid expression of yours again. I know that you killed me when you threw me down that elevator chute. But then, I don’t know– I don’t know how you brought me back to life. Was it–they used somebody else? Was it AI or CGI? What was it? Oh, it’s that thing that we struck over with the union.
Hattie, what, in the wide, wide world of soaps are you talking about?
You used my image and likeness without my permission. And now you’re going to have to pay for it. I will put that in my contract.
Contract?
Contract. And let’s be clear about one thing. I am not setting foot on that stage until I get a signed contract for everything that I want.
There’s that stupid face of yours again. Why do you look so baffled? You know what? This one told me that you want me back on the show.
[tense music]
You told her I wanted her back on “Body & Soul”?
And I don’t come cheap. So let me think. I’m going to need a raise. And I want Bonnie Lockhart off the set. And–and I’d like an apology from Abe and Kate. And I’d like a little groveling from you.
OK. So you expect me to grovel? How about we also throw in a private jet, a Ferrari 250 GTO Tipo, and a lifetime supply of pork rinds?
Wow, yeah. I mean, except for the pork rinds. They tend to give me gas.
Yeah, I knew it. OK, so here’s the thing. You’re not getting any of those things because you are not wanted back on “Body & Soul.”
Wait. What?
Not as Charlemagne, not as an under 5, not as an extra. In fact, if you even set foot on the set of “Body & Soul” again, you will be sent down an elevator shaft for real this time, and there will be no coming back from the dead. You got that, Hattie Addams? Or should I call you Lady Whistleblower?
My brother? I think you’ve got this wrong. Leo hired Rafe to find the new Lady Whistleblower, not Hattie Adams.
Except Rafe now believes that they’re one and the same. So he’s trying to locate her. And when I asked him to back off, he pointed out to me that it was perfectly legal for him to track her down, which, of course, it is.
[tense music]
And you think he found her tonight?
He said he was working on a case, so it’s possible.
So if Hattie’s been found, would that be so bad? I mean, it seems to me like he did all the heavy lifting for you.
Yeah, heavy lifting that I did not ask him to do.
But I don’t get it. Jada, what’s the downside? I mean, if Hattie’s been found, isn’t that the goal? Isn’t that a good thing?
It could be, unless it screws up my case.
Belle Black screwed up your case?
Mm-hmm.
I didn’t even know she was in town.
She is. And by all accounts, she has delayed her return to defend the man who tried to kill Chad.
Really? I mean, the one whose sister posed as Abigail?
That’s exactly who I mean. And apparently, Belle has no problem with how– aside from that attempted murder– they both preyed upon our brother’s grief. Damn it. Damn it. I was this close to putting that miscreant away for 0 years.
And now?
Now, thanks to Belle’s interference, I’ll be lucky if that son of a bitch does the full 8 months, not to mention yet another loss on my record.
Mm, right, damaging your heretofore impeccable reputation. [laughs]
Why the hell do I ever expect empathy from you?
Oh, come on. I’m just–I’m just teasing you, EJ. Look, I know it’s upsetting that you might lose this case. But then again, you might not, right?
A whole lot slimmer chance with Belle defending that bastard. Damn it. I can’t–I can’t let her get away with this, and I won’t.
[ominous music]
OK. What are you going to do, lock her up?
No.
No.
No. But I will get my revenge, and you’re going to help me.
Oh.
So you think Kristen went out of her way to ruin your date with Ava?
You think it’s crazy that the woman that literally went out of her way to make masks to impersonate people to screw with their lives could have stolen my ballet tickets or turned off the Wi-Fi in a hotel room? That’s child’s play to her, Belle.
Yeah, OK.
And obviously, we have no proof that Kristen did it. [doorbell rings] So I guess we’ll just have to throw it up to unfortunate events or coincidence.
Kristen is after us.
[dramatic music]
So exactly how am I supposed to help you exact revenge on Belle Black?
Well, she’s been doing some consulting work for DiMera Hong Kong– a cushy job, if there ever was one. And I doubt she’d be happy should the generous fees she enjoys were to suddenly stop flowing in her direction.
Oh. So you want me to fire her?
It would be a teachable moment. Ms. Black would learn to stop meddling in my affairs.
Oh, OK. Right. So, you know, and why– why would I want to help you?
Oh, come now, Kristen. Surely you can see how this would benefit you too.
[laughs] Actually, no, I don’t.
Oh, fine. Let me spell it out for you.
Please.
Philip Kiriakis just went to court to get his mitts on Titan in a dispute over Victor’s will. Now he’s co-CEO. Guess who made that magic happen for the man.
They were a thing once. It’s not a surprise that she would take his case, EJ.
But now she’s back in his orbit and Titan’s. She could be feeding him DiMera secrets as we speak.
Well, who’s to say I can’t use Belle to get the skinny on Titan’s secrets?
OK, now you’re just being contrary. But fine. Then how about this? The woman is your ex’s sister. Don’t you want to stick it to Brady for rejecting you again?
[sighs] Well, I got other fish to fry when it comes to Brady.
So all of these came from the same unknown number.
Yeah, they started right after you left.
All three of them at the same time?
Well, the first two, they came bam, bam. And then the third one came shortly after that. And then I kept demanding to know who it was, and then they stopped.
Oh. “Too bad about ‘The Nutcracker.'” Well, if it is Kristen, she’s not being very subtle about it.
No, this, this– this is Kristen. This is–she’s the one that took the tickets. Here. I got to go over there.
OK, I’ll come with you.
No, Ava. Ava, that’s not a good idea.
Brady, I’m not afraid of her.
I know you’re not afraid of her. But she’s using you to get to me, and I’ve got to be the one to tell her it’s not going to work.
Well, enough about my issues. So who are you waiting on?
Just JJ Deveraux. It’s not a date– just drinks.
You sound very sure about that. So who invited who?
Actually, it was Javi.
Javi?
Well, he didn’t exactly do any inviting. But when I told him that JJ had suggested that he and I hang out sometime, he grabbed my phone, texted JJ before I could stop him, basically pretending to be me and taking JJ up on the suggestion that he and I hang out sometime.
[laughs] That sounds like Javi.
Yeah. He can be really annoying, as I’m sure you’ve noticed.
Yeah, but he obviously meant well. So JJ initiated it, right? I mean, he was the one that suggested it?
Yeah. So what?
So sounds like a date to me.
No. It’s not like that. What we had ended a long time ago. Now JJ and I are just friends. And JJ is just staying in through Christmas, so I’m sure that he just wants to catch up. [knocking on door] That must be him.
Wow. You look great.
Thanks. So do you.
So are you ready for our date?
I don’t know. This is getting a little weird.
A little?
Yeah, well, you know, you call me Lady Whistleblower when we both are pretty sure that you’re Lady Whistleblower.
Nice try, you thieving plagiarizer, who betrayed me after I welcomed you into my home– if you can call this sad, little room a home. We shared laughs, pork rinds. I introduced you to “RuPaul’s Drag Race.”
I know. Why do you say I betrayed you?
Uh, you hacked into my computer to get your hands on my stories, and then you gave them away in your so-called gossip column for the entire world to see.
I hacked into your computer? The only thing I know about doing anything on a computer is to shop at sassyclothes.com and– and play that Cyborg game. And as for writing, I mean, I– I do all my letters in my own handwriting, which, I must say, is rather lovely.
Talk about confusing the issue.
Yeah. I’m so confused I’m not even sure what the issue is.
The issue, Hattie, is that you vowed to get revenge on the show. And you have done it in the meanest, sneakiest, most reprehensible way.
I didn’t vow to get revenge on your show because that would be just stupid. What I did was– I put a curse on your show. And as far as Lady Whistleblower goes, whoever she is, I’m grateful for what she’s done. Now, since there’s been a colossal misunderstanding, I’ll just– I’ll just be on my way.
Whoa. Sorry, Hattie.
What?
No, no, no. You’re not going anywhere.
Hey, hey.
I’m placing you under citizen’s arrest.
[tense music]
Wait a minute. You can’t arrest somebody for spoiling a soap opera plot– even if they didn’t do it.
I am not arresting you for spoiling a soap opera plot. I am arresting you for trying to poison the cast and crew of “Body & Soul.”
What?
Yeah, “What?” Someone sent tainted cupcakes to everyone, and a lot of people got sick.
Oh, that’s terrible. Wait, you think I did that?
Um, can we get back to the part where you admitted you put a curse on the show?
You know, they’ve been trying to find you for weeks. There’s an APB out on you, Hattie.
Well, I don’t know anything about an APB. But look–look, I didn’t poison any cupcakes.
Well, then why did you fall off the map? Clearly, you didn’t want to be found.
Maybe I was sick of looking at your silly face.
[gasps]
[tense music]
Look, Rafe, I promise. I swear to you, I didn’t poison any cupcakes.
Well, tell it to the police.
[gasps]
Yeah, I’m ready. Uh, JJ, this is Jada Hunter, my brother’s fiancée. Jada, this is JJ Deveraux.
Mm, nice to meet you.
Likewise.
I am going to go grab my purse.
So I’ve heard a lot about you, JJ.
Oh, yeah?
Mm-hmm. I’m the new commissioner, and I heard that you used to be on the force, right?
Yeah, I was.
Yeah. And Gabi told me that you’re possibly going to be leaving around–after the holidays?
That’s the plan so far.
Oh. Well, do you think you might want to stick around? Because if so, we got a spot on the Salem PD for you, and we’d be happy to have you back.
Oh. Well, thank you. But uh–
I know. I know it’s a long shot, but I need all the good people I can get. So I thought I’d just put it out there.
So shall we go?
Sure, yeah.
Good luck with the case. And don’t be mad at Rafe.
I’ll try not to. Oh, hey, you two, you guys have fun on your date.
Thank you. It was nice meeting you, Jada.
Oh, same. [phone ringing] Hey, if you’re coming home, knock first. I haven’t wrapped your present yet.
Well, actually, I have an early Christmas present for you.
Let me guess. You found Hattie Addams.
How’d you guess?
Call it a hunch.
I should not have let him go alone.
Oh, no. Brady can handle Kristen. But it sure sounds like she did everything she could to upend your night.
[laughs] Maybe. But we still had fun anyway. We just rolled with it.
Think you’ll do it again– I mean, without all the drama?
Yeah, I’m definitely down.
Hm.
What?
Well, I mean, it just puts you right in the middle of Brady and Kristen if that happens. Do you think that’s wise?
Well, I’m not going to go out of my way to antagonize the woman. But like I keep telling Brady, I’m not afraid of her. Besides, Kristen and he are over.
Yeah, I don’t think Kristen got that memo– or she ignored it anyway.
[laughs] Well, that’s pretty standard fare for her, right?
Nothing is standard with Kristen.
[tense music]
Belle, is that really the reason you’re worried?
What do you mean?
Maybe you just don’t want me around your brother, which I would totally understand.
I’ve done some pretty horrible things to your family in the past.
Listen, Ava. I really–I don’t blame you for that. I know that you weren’t in your right mind at the time. What I’m worried about is a woman who is not in her right mind right now.
So what are these other fish you have to fry with Brady?
What the hell is it with these games that you are playing, hmm?
So usually, we prefer our guests to be announced. But hey, why stand on ceremony?
Did you–did you– did you really think that these little mystery texts of yours are going to scare Ava? Because it’s not going to work.
What mystery texts?
The texts that you sent her when I left. “Sorry about ‘The Nutcracker.'” “How was your date?”
Oh. Well, how was “The Nutcracker”?
As if you don’t know. Somehow, my tickets just disappeared out of my pocket mysteriously. And then we couldn’t go to the show. And then, somehow we were trying to watch a movie at Ava’s place, and the Wi-Fi just went out. Isn’t that crazy?
Ooh, sounds like an amazing date.
Yeah, thanks to you. Thanks so much, by the way.
What? Wait, wait, wait, wait. Thanks to me? Oh, come on, Brady. It is not my fault that your date with Ava was a bust. I mean, hey, you know what? Have you ever considered maybe it was fate telling you that dating the ex-Mafia princess was a really big mistake? [sighs]
[jazz music playing]
Ooh.
It’s strong.
[laughs] I know, right?
Yeah. Thank you for suggesting this place.
Yeah. Well, there’s not that many choices in Salem.
Well, you made the right one. Actually, I got to admit, I was surprised to get your text.
Really? Why?
Well, when we got back from Vancouver and I mentioned getting together, you seemed a little tentative about it.
It’s because I wasn’t sure if you were being serious.
Oh, why wouldn’t I be serious?
Well, you know how it is when people say “Maybe we’ll get together,” and then they don’t. But I decided, why not? You said you were staying in town to look after Julie through the holidays and that you might leave after. So I decided if I didn’t see you before Christmas, it might never happen.
Well, then I’m glad you sent that text, and it did happen. Cheers.
Hey. Hey, get your mitts off of me!
Hattie–hey, pipe down, or I’m going to zip tie you.
So this is my present?
Yeah. Sorry I couldn’t wrap it for you.
You try that, you’ll be singing soprano.
You know, Shawn got a lead on where Hattie was holed up too. Only he got there too late, which was too bad, because then he could have made an actual arrest.
Yeah, he could have if he’d have got there first. Look, I understand that you’re upset about this, but think about it. Hattie is here now. You can question her about the tainted cupcakes, OK? Everybody wins.
No, not everybody wins. I don’t win. Kept from getting a fan club started. Don’t even get to have a Daytime Emmy nomination.
Yeah. Do me a favor, will you? Let Mayor Price know that I was the one that brought her in.
I’ll be sure to do that. Come on, Hattie. You and I have a little chat.
I don’t think so, because I think I get a phone call.
You might not know this, but my friend Chloe tried to rekindle her relationship with Brady, and Kristen did everything–everything she could to tank it.
Eh, well, that’s her MO. At least she’s consistent.
Consistently unstable. Ava, she thinks of Brady as her personal property. She is completely obsessed with him.
I know.
Desperate– desperate to rekindle this relationship with him, even though he said that’s never going to happen.
I get it. I do. I know. I know she is delusional and unstable, like you said.
She is also dangerous, and I mean seriously dangerous. So I want to make sure you really know what you’re getting into.
Belle, don’t worry about me. I have tangled with Kristen before, and I can take care of myself.
Kristen.
Huh?
Fate has nothing to do what’s going on here, OK? Everything that happened tonight is your doing. You got jealous, and you decided to ruin my date with Ava. All right? And I’m telling you, it’s not going to bring me closer to you. What you’re doing is going to push me away from you. Do you understand that? Maybe you do. Maybe you don’t. But I’m warning you, this is going to stop. No more sabotaging my dates with Ava or anybody else, OK? Because I really don’t want to be disgusted by you anymore than I already am, OK? Do you–do you–is that clear?
[laughs] Oh, it is clear.
Oh. While we’re making proclamations, could you pass one along to your sister? Tell her to stay the hell out of my cases.
Or what? OK. Yeah, you too. I’ve enjoyed my time at the house of horrors. Have a terrible night, OK?
You too.
[scoffs] The nerve of him– actually thinking that I sent those texts to Ava. I mean, my God.
Speaking of which, I would have thought you’d write something with a little more backbone.
What? Oh, come on, EJ.
Oh, come on, Kristen. I walk in on you with your nose buried in your phone. It’s obvious that you’re trying to stop me from seeing what you’re reading and writing. And then you tell me that you’ve got bigger fish to fry with Brady. You’re obviously the one who sent those pathetic texts.
[tense music]
[sighs]
And the way that ill-bred woman was looking at me like I was the villain after she not only had people puking their guts up with those revolting, little cupcakes, but then took my old job to try and screw me out of my new one. [beeping] It’s my Lady Whistleblower alert. Ooh, I don’t want to look, but I will.
[tense music] It’s an update to today’s column. “Hey, all you good little boys and girls, “especially the not so good ones. “It’s your old pal Lady Whistleblower here. “And hey, I know a lot of you have been wondering who I am. “Well, spoiler alert, my friends. I am not Hattie Adams.”
All right, Hattie, let’s go back to November 8th, “Body & Soul” premiere. Walk me through your day.
Walk you through– how the heck do I know what I was doing? Why don’t you walk me through your day on November 8th, hmm?
It doesn’t matter what I was doing on November 8th. I’m not the one being questioned. So maybe you’ll recall that.
Stop. Hattie’s not saying another word until I’ve had a chance to speak with her.
It’s Belle Black to the rescue.
Seriously? You’re Hattie’s attorney?
And I’d like a moment alone with my client.
Make it fast.
You make it fast. So you’re going to be my counselor.
Hey. Peace offering. I thought you could use a little fortification while you’re grilling Hattie.
There’s not going to be any grilling.
Well, why not?
Because she lawyered up.
Oh. Damn.
Yeah. You know, if Shawn had gotten to her before you did, we might have had a chance at questioning her without tipping her off. She could have spilled something before clamming up. So thanks for nothing, Hernandez. Your Christmas present sucked.
Hmm.
So have you decided how long you’re going to stay in town?
Um, no. But when we were back at your place and you were off getting your purse, Jada asked me if I’d come back to the force.
Yeah. I know they’re short-staffed. They could definitely use you. Are you considering it?
I don’t know. You remember what happened with Theo.
Yeah, I do. It was an accident, JJ.
I know. It’s just he almost didn’t come back from it. And I almost didn’t, either. I know I–I know I’ve said this before, but I don’t think I can say it enough. If you hadn’t shown up at my door that Christmas Eve, I wouldn’t be sitting here right now.
I’m very glad I did.
I run a global corporation, EJ, in case that slipped your mind. I spend most of my days making deals, kneecapping the competition, and taking no prisoners. When do I have any time to leave those– how did you put it– pathetic texts? Hmm?
Oh, I know your priorities, Kristen. And the evidence is staring me right in the face.
I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Oh, I think you do. [laughs]
[laughs]
Mm.
What happened?
Kristen denied sending the texts– no surprise. Did you get any more?
Nope, been radio silence since you left.
Well, EJ was there, so she’s not likely to send any while he’s around.
Unless–
Unless what?
Brady, is it possible that we could be wrong? I mean, Kristen isn’t really known for being subtle. So if she wanted me to stay away from you, she’d just come out and say it, right? She’d demand it. [beeping]
[tense music]
What does it say?
“Stay away from Brady.”
[doorbell rings]
Oh, what the hell do you want?
Back to the Days Transcripts Page
Back to the Main Daytime Transcripts Page
Follow Us!
