GH Transcript Thursday, May 2, 2024

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Transcript provided by Suzanne

THIS STILL NEEDS EXTENSIVE EDITING!

Okay. I will be haven. Oh, you are nothing like that woman. That’s why it’s called acting, ma. Okay. Georgie, james, pay attention. You guys are gonna be the audience. Go easy on me, will ya? What do you say, guys? Are we gonna be an easy crowd? Or are we gonna be a tough crowd? Tough. Oh! Shocker.

[ Laughs ] Oh! Brook lynn, this is so exciting. Your grandmother loves

home & heart. She’s gonna be over the moon about this. Your other grandmother. Oh, good. More interlopers in… monica’s home.

[ Laughing ] Whoa! What’s with her? Tracy’s been in a huff all week having the kids home on spring break. I feel her pain. Mom! You know I love you. Where’s bailey lou? Uh, she’s with my mom.

[ Chuckles ] Thank god. She’s been a real terror lately. Oh, not my girl bailey! Yeah, your girl bailey. Back me up, georgie. Total terror. See? It’s weird to put cream on your face. Like, it doesn’t really even do anything. How would you know, huh? I tried it. Like, the tiniest pea-size amount, right? I don’t know. I just dumped it in my hand and started rubbing it around.

[ Laughs ] Oh! Oh, look, it’s violet! Hi, violet. And chase and gregory, of course. You guys came to watch. We wouldn’t have missed it. Uncle chase said you were practicing to be a tv star. I might do that when I’m older, too. I thought you want to be a doctor like your dad. Tv star is my backup for if that takes too long. Oh! I love it. A woman with a plan. Come here and join our tough crowd. Whoo! Lights, camera, action. Oh!

[ Laughter ] Where, for the love of god, is the nanny? There are children in every corner of this house. Melanie’s mother had a dental emergency. Oh, great. Well, now for my second and final complaint. I highly doubt that. I cannot believe that you took my intention to hire a cook as an opportunity to offer the job to sasha. We don’t know if she can boil a hot dog. She has worked in restaurants, tracy. Of the fast-food variety. Uh, no. Real restaurants. Well, so has almost everybody under the age of 30 without a trust fund. So what?

[ Telephone rings ] Seventh floor. No. Dr. Soriano, I believe you can find nurse baldwin down in pediatric icu. Of course, I’ll let her know if I do. Everybody’s looking for elizabeth. I know. I would hate to be her. They asked me to work a double, but I can’T. You? I just worked a 12 overnight. I-I have kids to get home to. So does elizabeth. Maybe I am an awful person. We can’t rule it out.

[ Telephone rings ] Seventh floor.

[ Elevator bell dings ] I’m sorry, dr. Soriano. If she’s not there, I don’t know. Try…orthopedics?

[ Sighing ] Oh, god. Problem? Guess not. Uh, michael said wiley was throwing up last night, so I thought maybe I should pick up something for him on the way home, but no answer. So I guess melanie — the nanny — must be out with both kids and he’s fine.

[ Laughs ] Um, don’t shoot the messenger, but I have been deputized to do a multi-floor search for a nurse who is willing to take an additional shift, since regina’s out sick. I’m sorry. I-I’ve just — I’ve been here all night. I just can’T. I have a 1-year-old who, after a 12-hour shift, I don’t think even remembers me. I hear you. I couldn’t have worked the hours that you do when my girls were little, which begs the question… what? You’re not asking me why I have a job? Oh, no! Sorry. No, having work that fulfills you, work that makes a difference — these things matter.

[ Telephone rings ] Sorry. Seven floor. Elizabeth, I am so sorry. I just — of course I would. I would be happy to pick aiden up. No trouble at all. Elizabeth is still looking for a replacement, but in the meantime, I’m gonna pick up aiden for her, so I guess I feel a little less guilty.

[ Chuckles ] Well, I better continue my search. With a little bit of luck, elizabeth will be out of here while the sun is still shining. There. See? All right, good job, wiley. Hey. What’s up? With melanie helping out with her mom, I thought it’d be fun to hang out with the kids, but apparently I’m not as fascinating as comet. Few people are, michael. Few people are. Hey. Is lunch ready? The new cook said 45 minutes. I’m not optimistic. Okay. Well, uh, you should be optimistic because you know, the new, uh, cook is that old friend of mine, and I bet she does a great job. I’m with you, michael. I think the new cook is a real find. Melanie? I’m home. Hmm. It doesn’t sound like anyone’s here. No, it doesn’T. Maybe she took the kids up to the main house for lunch. Do you want to join them, or I can make a sandwich for you to eat here if you want. I’ll go up to the house. I know you worked the overnight shift. You must be tired. Aw. Your mom did, too. I hope it doesn’t take too long to find that replacement nurse. You must be desperate to go home and get into bed. Thanks for picking me up at the library. Of course. I’ll text jake to pick me up from his soccer practice. How do sports get away with holding practice when there’s no school? It’s his travel league, so they’re basically allowed to do whatever they want. Let me know if you need anything? I will. I always found it easier to hold the products like this, but maybe that’s just me. No, it fe– it feels better. Okay, maybe you turn the label around so it’s facing directly towards the camera. Hey, you know what, sasha? Why don’t you show brook lynn how to cheat to an imaginary camera, like, over there somewhere? I have the non-imaginary camera right here.

[ Chuckles ] What are you doing here? Because I was so rudely not invited? Well, you know, I just thought that maybe a screen test for our new proposed spokesmodel was in order. Why? Why? Because you seem to think that anybody and everybody can sort of do the duties that I did so well. That remains to be seen.

[ Doorbell rings ] You must be isaac. Come on in.

[ Sighs ] Here’s my pride and joy.


You want to describe the texture — what it smells like, how it feels on your skin. With glowing adjectives, of course. Of course. Silky, dewy, fresh. Then you apply just the dab on your cheek, and you rub it in… …just like this. Lucy: Ah. Flawless. Okay, let’s shoot. Brook lynn, you’re up. Okay, ready? Uh, quiet on the set. Action! Lois: Okay. Honey, hold it a little closer to your face. That way the viewers can see the label. Brook lynn: Like this? Exactly. I was gonna say that. Yes. Yes. Like this? Um, not that close. Maybe…here should be good. I think I’m gonna go sit out in the sun for a while, get some vitamin D. Can I come? All: No! Good luck, kiddo.

[ Laughter ] Brother! Okay. Take two action! Sasha is a great cook. I just never thought that she’d be doing it for a living. Yeah, I think the, uh, offer of free room and board was too tempting. Also, the flexibility, I don’t think mama q’s gonna fully surrender her kitchen. No. No, no. I mean, it’s probably mostly just breakfast and lunches while olivia’s at work. Plus, sasha has weekends off, which is great. And maybe I can make a music video someday. I would love that. And ride comet while I’m singing! Whoa, whoa, whoa. You’re gonna have to talk to his agent first. And who’s his agent? You’re looking at him. Is it okay for the boys to play in the hay, even though the horses eat it? Uh, it better be ’cause they do it all the time. Can I go play with them? Look at him. Uh, yeah. Have at it. I love the smell of hay! Georgie, keep an eye on the littles, will you? And holler if you need any help. You got it. So, uh, what’s this about a music video? Violet was watching brook lynn practice her spokesmodeling up at the house, and they were videotaping her, and now violet’s got a little bee in her bonnet. Wait, I thought blaze was the new face of deception. She is, but it’s in her contract that she won’t do any of the promotional stuff. Oh, so that’s on brook lynn now? And I don’t think she’s too happy about it. Tracy, you are not the only decision maker in this household. And I am not the only person in this household who was sick to death of leftovers and yuri’s borscht. Hello. That’s why I hired someone. I want a real cook. No, you want someone who’s not gonna let anyone into the kitchen, and I’m not gonna allow that again. That’s the point. They have their domain, and we have ours. Ah, tracy. I love cooking for my family, when I have the time to do it. That’s what makes sasha the perfect solution to this problem. Hello, aiden. Hi. Ms. Quartermaine. Hello, another family’s child. Be nice. Something smells good. Yes. It does smell good, doesn’t it, tracy? Where’d you come from? My mom got stuck at work, so mrs. Corinthos picked me up and dropped me off. Well, lunch is gonna be served shortly, so I certainly hope you’ll stick around and eat with us. I’d like that. Thanks. Of course you would. Just want to peek in the oven. Sasha. When you finish lunch, I have a request. Okay. Would you go get a cookbook, please? Bring it here to me. Open it to any page and point. Mamma mia! You gotta be kidding me. Aha!

Tournedos rossini. Sounds delightful. That’s what I want for dinner.


Tournedos rossini? One of my favorites. Do we have pté? And if we do, will the kids eat it? I don’t know. Tracy, what do you think? The kids want pté? I think you should pick another recipe.

Pot-au-feu. Perfect second choice.

Pot-au-feu it is. Dinner at 7:00? Oh. Works for me. Sasha, I am so sorry. I take it tracy is not happy with me as the new cook? What was your first clue? Well, I’ll just have to prove her wrong, won’t I? Oh, bless you. Honey, I’m gonna give you all the space you need. If you need anything at all, you just call me for backup. Okay. Bye. Thank you. Can I ask you a question? Ask away. I love to bake, but I’ve never seen anything like what you have in the oven. Oh, well, it’s a great way to use any leftovers you have in the fridge. You want to help me chop up some vegetables, and I’ll tell you all about it? Sure. Come on.

[ Door opens ] Hey. Sorry. Didn’t mean to wake you. No, it’s okay. Where’s melanie? Oh, uh, her mom had a little emergency. Is she okay? Uh, yeah, yeah. It was just a dental thing. So I came home to be with the kids, and wiley is at the stables with cody. Oh, the horses were more entertaining than dad, huh? Yeah, pretty much.

[ Chuckles ] I, uh — I sent aiden up to the main house for lunch. Aiden webber? Yeah. Elizabeth got stuck at the hospital, asked if I could bring him here and make sure he got fed. Well, that’s nice of you to help out. All right. It’s time for you to go to bed. Um, you stay here. Get some rest. And I’ll be right back. Okay. Here we go. You ready? I hear deception is debuting a new product. That’s right, haven. What’s it called? Disruptor nourishing moisturizer. Catchy name. I know, right? Can you tell us about it? Oh, yes! Our newest product is a face cream. It does wonders for the skin. We like the sound of that. Please go on. Okay, yes, well, um, the texture is silky smooth, and you just take a little bit on — oh, shoot. Cut! I’m sorry! No, no, no, honey, it’s okay! You’re still getting the hang of it.

[ Clapping ] I want 100 jars and the beautiful face-cream model. Uh, sorry, you are not our target audience. All right, come on. Let’s look at the dailies. Okay. Come on, sweetie. Come on, come on. Let’s see. Let’s see. Play it on this thing. Here we go. Play. Brook lynn: …Silky smooth, and you just take a little bit on — oh, shoot. Okay. Well, that’s what rehearsals are for. Sasha wasn’t perfect the first time, either. Uh, she was a lot better than that. Okay! You know what, brook lynn, you just need to relax. Come on, come on, come on. Just a little bit. And you know what? We’re gonna just try it again. -Okay. -Okay? Excuse me. Why don’t we give the professionals a chance? And I’m guessing you’re the professional? Watch and learn.

[ Sighs ] How was your shift? Oh, long, exhausting, but good. All right. Do you want to head up to bed? Don’t tempt me. No, go ahead. You deserve a nap. You know, I, uh… I sleep better when you’re beside me.


I’m too young to die.What do you desperados want? All your money. Ah! [ Laughs ] You picked the wrong cowboy. We’ll take your horses then. But they already belong to your family. Actually, i am the sheriff, and you’re all under arrest. Ah! Including you. And now you have to marry georgie. That’s a weird punishment. -[ Laughs ] -Aah!

[ Grunting ] Ah. Thank you. What did I do? You arrived just in the nick of time. Saved me from getting hitched. Well, you’re welcome. How’s it going up at the manse? Pretty sure that my first day as to cook will also be my last. Tracy? She’s not a fan.

[ Laughs ] And it’s a real bummer because I really liked my new room. Um, do you want me to talk to her? I mean, believe it or not, I think tracy actually likes me. It’s okay. You know what? There was something too good about it to be true from the start. Especially the part where I got to be near you every day. Olivia’s mad at me. What happened? We need a cook. Quartermaines have always had a cook. Not since I’ve known you. No, because since you’ve known me, olivia has lived here, and she insisted that she could take it on. But you cannot run a hotel, raise a child with special needs, and cook breakfast, lunch, and dinner for a house full of people. It’s too much. Agreed. So, instead of hiring a professional cook, olivia offered the job to her friend. Do I know this friend? You certainly do. Sasha corbin. And I get it. Olivia wants somebody that she can kick out of the kitchen without feeling uncomfortable. When she wants to cook, you mean? Mm-hmm. And I certainly do understand that, but we don’t know if sasha has the skills for this, and hiring someone to do a job that they can’t do helps no one. Not us and not sasha. Am I being awful? You’re being practical. Some homes, the kitchen is a place to gather. Not this one. Exactly. We have the nook for that. How come you get that and olivia doesn’t? Probably because I have no skin in the game. But this is olivia’s home, too. She just wants to be comfortable in it. Am I being too rigid? You’re being you. So, that’s rigid, angry, and unyielding.

[ Chuckles ] Where does that come from, you think? Lucy: Haven. [ Chuckles ] Haven, have I told you that I am the brainchild of deception? Haven? Oh, yes. About 17 billion times.

[ Laughs ] Right, right, because it’s so true. And you all — all are very, very welcome. Now, today we have the disruptor nourishing moisturizer, brand-new product and, by the way, my idea. Well, I mean, it wasn’t my idea, the formula, but the way it benefits your skin — totally my idea. Let me — let me show you.

[ Chuckles ] Okay. Wait. There. Mm. It is so absorbing. It absorbs right straight into your skin. It’s not absorbing at all. Working that cream like it’s furniture polish.

[ Lucy speaks indistinctly ] Yikes. She’s not very good at this, is she? I don’t think I’m one to talk. What? You were perfect. Like a deer in headlights. Look, I love maxie and deception, but I can’t help but feel like this is a wrong turn for me. You did seem

kind of uncomfortable. Kind of? And nobody watching is gonna believe that you need a face cream. I love you. Aha! See? There.

[ Clears throat ] All absorbed. Our disruptor nourishing moisturizer cream is so good. It feels so wonderful on my skin, ladies and gentlemen. My baby, my creation. Get yours today! Oh, well, that was, um… fantastic. I know. Thank you. Um, you know what? Why don’t we just review it all, take a peek, and then we can all just kind of vote? Okay. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I think I’m mad at time. And all the years that I wasted being too afraid to… leave my safety net. The only risk I ever took in my life was on luke, and I only had him for a few years before I lost him. Happiness is great as long as you’ve got it. Are you unhappy now? No. I’m disappointed. The advantages that I’ve been given in life are obscene. As are… …how little I’ve done with them.


Okay, this is gonna sound crazy. When has that ever stopped you? Why don’t you move in with me? I’ve got a nice, comfortable room upstairs if you can stand the spiral staircase to get to it. I’m not wrong in that we have kissed exactly once, yes? No, that — that’s right. Yes. So, I feel like cohabitation isn’t really the natural next step. Well, we wouldn’t be sharing a bed or anything. Unless you wanted to, in which case, we totally could be.

[ Laughs ] And where would you sleep? Uh, well, you know, we’ve got an extra cot in the tack room for when a mare is foaling. I could just bring it upstairs.

[ Alarm beeping ] That’s lunch. I need to take it out of the oven. There’s plenty if you’re interested. I am definitely interested. Georgie! Round up the kids for lunch! Let’s go! Georgie! Lucy:

Get yours today. -Huh. -Huh. Well, you know, nobody looks, uh, good in that kind of light. You know what? I think brook lynn just needs one more run-through. That’s all. Come on, sweetie. Come here. Come here. Come stand. All right. Look, I’m gonna show you, okay? So, you want to pick up and hold the product like this. Okay? Right? Not like this like it’s a secret weapon, but like it’s — it’s the greatest secret in life, and you are gonna share that secret with the world. Or with the viewers of home & heart, at least, okay? And then you’re gonna open it very gently. Maybe smell. Mmm! Right? And then you’re gonna take just a tiny little bit. Right? What are you doing? Why? Why? Why not? Okay. And then, you’re going to see that it’s like a little pearl.

[ Gasps ] Right? Which is fitting because this cream is the ultimate in luxury. You’re gonna put it on. Mm! Silky, hydrating. Oh, it’s like I’ve died and gone to heaven, right? Right? Mm. Oh, good. I was just coming to find you. How’s it looking? Light brown on top and ready to come out, I think. Perfect. I’m happy to help you serve it if you want. Yeah? You’re a lifesaver, aiden webber. Hey. Are you headed back to the office? Uh, nah, that ship as sailed, I think. What about you? When’s your next shift? I’ve been thinking about that, about my job at gh in general. Yeah, I saw you were, uh, looking at that new tomorrow institute pamphlet. Oh, you did, did you? Yeah, I’m observant like that. So…talk to me. Representing the nonprofit, it would essentially be a part-time volunteer position. Okay. Meaning I’d no longer be getting paid. Well, you know, it’s not like we need the money. I know, but a lot of people do. Like elizabeth, for example. She’s raising three boys on her own, and she doesn’t have the luxury of turning down a double shift like I do. Yeah, I hope jason being back can ease her financial burden a little bit. I hope so, too. But it’s got me thinking. Nursing is wonderful, important work, and I’ve — I’ve loved doing it. I know you have. But I am starting to wonder if I’ve been doing it for the wrong reasons.


independence is important to me. I get that. And I’m not sure I even realized it at the time, but it was a huge factor in my becoming a nurse. The idea of solely relying on you for money — it made me uncomfortable. I liked knowing that if you left tomorrow… never happening. …I could stand on my own two feet. And I still relate to all that. I just… taking this position would allow me to still do something meaningful that makes me proud, while being able to be there for my kids in a way I can’t now. I’d get to see all of wiley’s t-ball games and take amelia to the swings myself, not hear about it later from melanie. Well, just to be clear, you know, melanie — she’s a great nanny, and, uh, the kids are happy and thriving. I know. I know they are, but I’m missing stuff, michael. And I don’t have to. And that makes me so incredibly lucky. I mean, what drew is proposing — an opportunity for me to help recruit bone-marrow donors and stem-cell donors who, in turn, could help cure cancers like I had, and also spend significantly more time with my kids? I mean, what a gift, for them and for me. Well, it sounds like you made up your mind. You don’t seem surprised.

[ Chuckles ] I had a feeling this is how it would shake out. I just, I wanted you to get there yourself. And here I am. Here you are. Here we are. So you’re on board if I do this? I’m on board with anything that makes you happy. Anything? Anything. Why? Do you, uh… did you have something specific in mind? As a matter of fact, I do. If I’m hearing you right, you feel you’ve been… showered with temporal gifts in life — money, property, a close-knit if not always harmonious family. Ha! Harmonious. But in your opinion, you don’t have much to show for it. Well done. Achievement is overrated. I don’t think we were put on this earth to win trophies or become famous or make scientific discoveries. Don’t get me wrong, power to you if you do, but the way I see it, I… I think our job is to love the lives we’ve been given and the people we’ve been set down amongst and be grateful for all of it. I don’t think I’ve been very successful by that measure, either. There’s still time. And not all of us can say that. -Come on, guys, let’s go! -Hi, grandpa! Hey. Excuse us. Wiley: It’s time for lunch! Yes! Be brave, james. You can do it. I, for one, think it looks delicious. Thank you. You’re very welcome. Wait, ma, can you just go through it one more time? Mm-hmm. How did you hold the product so that it was showing towards the camera? Oh, okay. You hold it just like this. And how did you get just the right amount of cream? Oh, okay. Well, I’ll show you. You’ve gotta open it up gently and take just a little bit. You know, a little bit goes a long way. This cream — it’s a miracle, you know? I mean, it is a complete game changer. That’s the plan. And then? I’m sorry. Oh, sweetie. It’s okay. You’re just learning. The application part — can you show me that part again? Okay, yeah, you — oh, wait, smell this first. Huh? Oh, that smells like the summer. I mean, it takes me right back to the beach. And the texture of it — come on. I happen to be a woman of a certain age, and this — this makes me feel like I am brand-new. Lucy: Stop! Just stop right there. Stop, stop, and stop.


It is time to face facts. Brook lynn simply cannot be the deception spokesmodel. Whoa, whoa, whoa! I think you’re being a little hasty here, because brook lynn just needs a little bit more time. Time’s not really the problem. Lucy’s right, ma. Besides… we already have the perfect deception spokesmodel. Oh, if you say yourself again, lucy, I swear I’m gonna scream. Lois! It’s you. Huh? You. You’re it. Have you lost your ever-loving mind? No, because you just presented our product effortlessly. And, in fact, it was almost poetic. It’s true. I have the footage to prove it. And you love our products, lois. It has to be you.

[ Scoffs ]

Really? Really. And just imagine everyone in the old neighborhood seeing you on tv. Oh! The girls will get such a kick out of it, won’t they? Okay, come on. Come on. Are you in? Why, thank you. What service. Of course.

[ Chuckles ] This actually smells very good. Have you seen my dad? I have not. He must have gone back to our house. W to help me bring him some lunch? I bet I can beat you there. Oh, please. I’m much faster than both of you. Right, grandpa? She is pretty fast.

[ Chuckles ] Plate. Fork. On your mark, get set… go! This is really delicious. Gteau salé. You’ve had it before? I have. Luke and I were living abroad, and we used to take little weekend trips to… get a change of scene. Isn’t europe amazing that way? A train ride, you’re in another country. Our favorite place to stay was this bed and breakfast in bergerac in the dordogne. And every morning, the patronne would bring a gteau salé out for us when we woke up. Never the same ingredients twice, just whatever they had on hand. And it was always… perfect and light. Just like this. I would’ve liked to have met luke.

[ Laughs ] You would have hated him. I don’t think so. Maybe not. What else goes in a pot-au-feu? Come on, sasha, think. Why don’t you just look it up on your phone? Because that would be

cheating. Well, this is ridiculously good. Yeah? Yeah. Tracy would be crazy to pass on you.

[ Sighs ] From your lips. So, uh, speaking of lips…

[ Laughs ] Wow! What a segue. Yeah, I-I’m good at ’em. Um, no, uh… about before? I don’t — I don’t want you to think that I was trying to get you alone in my bedroom. Not that I’d be opposed, but… noted. The whole point is I’m team sasha. You won’t be without a place to crash as long as I’m around. Well, my dear, lunch was superb. I am delighted to welcome you to the household. Thank you. And don’t worry. I’m still working on dinner. You can stop. Actually, you can make whatever you want for dinner. No more tests. Do we understand each other? We do. And you — aren’t you supposed to be minding the rugrats? They’re not outside on the patio? No, they went off to look for michael. Ah! All right, on it.

[ Glass shatters ] It wasn’t my fault. Wiley pushed me. I did not! Hey, it doesn’t matter how it happened. Wiley, do you know where a broom is so we can clean this up? Here it is. What kind of party is this? And why wasn’t I invited? I brought my dad some lunch, but I can’t find him. Maybe they’re upstairs in bed. Let’s go look. Uh, I-I-I don’t think so. No. No. You all made a fine mess in the stables. You’re gonna help me clean up that bale of hay. -Fun! -Yeah! -Yay! All right, all of you, all of you, let’s go. Thank you. Yes, of course. It wasn’t supposed to be fun.

[ Door closes ] Are they gone? Gone. Remind me to give cody a raise.

[ Chuckles ] I will. I love you, willow. And I love our life. I love it, too. And you. So much it hurts sometimes.

On the next “General Hospital” —

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