Days of Our Lives Transcript
Transcript provided by Suzanne
THIS STILL NEEDS EXTENSIVE EDITING!
It was my pleasure.
Better get going
Breakfast my lady. . What is this? Said you were tired of grabbing meals, uh, on the run in between meetings, and you went to all this trouble because of some random comment. No, it wasn’t trouble. It was my pleasure. Well, it looks amazing. But, I might need a little help working up an appetite.
Oh yeah? Mm hmm. you don’t, I will. Okay, I’m
gonna… Go away! I trust you had a good night’s sleep, Mr. Roth? Indeed, I wasn’t counting on being in Salem this long. Has Mr. von Leuschner returned from his honeymoon? I’d like to settle the matter of his marriage legitimacy, so I can promptly release the funds. Dimitri has not yet returned, but of course, I will have him get in touch the moment he does.
Or, you could take me up on my offer and leave the funds with me. I thought I made it clear, Mr. Mayra. I must meet Dimitri and his new bride in person before any such funds can be released to anyone. What’s with global finance? It’s so Byzantine. Alright, Mr. Roth, I’m just trying to help. But to reiterate, uh, it’s best we continue to keep this little mission between us and away from certain prying eyes in this house.
Ah, you are something, Mrs. DiMera. And you, Mr. DiMera, under normal circumstances, I’d say close that door and see where things go, but… I think playtime is over. As bad as I want to push back against that, I have to agree with you. If we’re going to get to the bottom of what exactly is going on in this house, we have no time to waste.
Yeah, and I think a good starting place is the curious case of Elliot Roth. Is it me, or is all this hush hush investigation talk kind of… I’ve been aphrodisiac. You are hot as hell as a detective. Now I promise that once we get to the bottom of what Kristen and company are up to, I’m gonna shut that door and we’re not coming out for a month.
Oh, that works for me.
Oh my goodness! Look who’s here! The newlyweds are back from Iceland. How was the honeymoon? Well, it was great. Mostly great. We had some unexpected company. Company? The air turned up. Oh, really? Uh, did he have a reason for being in Reykjavik? Apparently there was a, uh, a secret Madonna concert. Uh, the Fjord Extravaganza or something like that.
And he, he just got a last minute ticket. Oh, of course, of course. You see a link that has a secret Madonna show on your newsfeed and then you just click on it and all of a sudden you are in a foreign country. But I am a little surprised that you are back home ahead of schedule. It wasn’t because of your friend, was it?
Oh, come on, Kristen. You know exactly why we’re back home ahead of schedule. And so do I. I cannot believe I am going back to the Salem Inn alone. While my BFF gets to go home to her big mansion and be the little spoon to my boyfriend. Dammit, I should have left you on the baggage carousel. Hey! Watch where you’re going!
Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives.
Sonny, you’re back in Salem. Oh, wow, your powers of deduction are second to none, as always. Hey, good luck dragging that bag across the square. Wait, wait, wait. When did you get back? Why are you here? Guess your powers of deduction aren’t so spot on after all. You might have heard my Uncle Vic died. Of course, I did.
I’m so sorry.
Sure you are.
So, you talked to Dimitri and he told you I told Gwen that, uh, you and I needed an in person powwow before the upcoming DiMera board meeting. Because as you pointed out, our combined shares have created quite a significant power block. But, we needed to strategize before walking into that room. Oh, you suck.
I certainly did. Oh, we do, yes. Oh, you know what? I am sorry that I interrupted your honeymoon and Gwen, please forgive me for playing dumb. I thought, uh, or I assumed that Dimitri was going to fill you in, but I didn’t know if he had a chance to yet. Right, well, sweetheart, why don’t you start unpacking?
Kristen and I have plenty to discuss, and the sooner that we finish, the sooner that I can devote myself exclusively to you.
Madonna? Really? Fiction, of course. Leo’s presence had to be explained once he was found out by Gwen at the hotel, and it was between Madonna and Gwen Stefani. Oh, hold on, wait a minute. You said that you were stringing Leo along to Von Leusch Dakota sale. Mm hmm. Pray tell, nephew. Why did you invite him on your honeymoon?
Oh, unless there’s something real between the two of you. Uncle
Stephen! Ah, there she is, my favorite niece in the whole wide world. Really? Really. You know, it turns out that I actually have a bit of a problem, and you are the only person in the whole world who can help me. See, Gabby told me that the two of you were playing a game of 20 questions. Do you know that’s my favorite game?
Well, it is. And I got so jealous when Gabby told me that you were playing. Do you know why? Because she was trying to guess a secret. And it turns out that I love secrets almost as much as I love to game 20 questions. So why don’t you and I pick up where you and Gabby left off? Wouldn’t Gabby be bad?
Maybe a little bit. But, wouldn’t it be fun if you and I could guess the secret before Gabby does? That’s mean. No, uh, Rachel, wait.
Sorry, I’m not ready to have my room cleaned just yet.
Oh! Sorry, I thought that… Not housekeeping, no broom. And who are you? What? You don’t remember me from last night? I’m Gabriela DiMera, Kristen’s sister in law. And you’re the one and only Elliot Roth! I’m sorry, uh, Mrs. DiMera, you’ve caught me unawares. Is there something I can do for you? Elliot Roth is asking what you can do for me, the prestigious headmaster of Martin Prep.
Listen, not one single thing. This visit is about what I can do for you.
My brother is married to an opportunistic fortune hunter who is hell bent on sleeping her way to the corner office at DiMera. And the last thing that Dimitri and Gwen need right now is that woman knowing about this enormous fortune that he has come into. That’s an intriguing offer, Mrs. DiMera, but as you can see, I’m in the middle of my breakfast and feeling rather peckish.
Well, aren’t we lucky this isn’t going to take very long. See, I have a daughter named Ariane who’s the most gifted, charming, effervescent young girl and… I would like to do you the great honor of admitting her to Martin Prep. I understand you’d like to have your daughter enrolled at our school, but I’m not the person to speak to on this matter.
Fine. Okay, fine. You know what? Give me the name and the number I have to call, and I will call them right now.
Rachel. I promise playing the game with me would not be mean to Gabby. See, Gabby and I are always trying to one up each other, right? It’s like a competition between us. In fact, when she finds out that you’ve been helping me, she’s probably going to want to recruit you to get back at me. So it’s not mean for anyone, it’s actually fun for everyone.
Aren’t all married people as weird as you? So is that a yes? Does that mean we get to play? Sure, okay. Yes! Okay. Oh, before we start, it’s really important that nobody else know that we’re playing, right? Cause this game’s about a secret, and secrets are secret for a reason, right? Okay, so. I have 20 questions to figure out what this secret is.
Nineteen. Nineteen? Oh, right! Of course, because Gabby used one of her guesses to ask you if the secret was about somebody who lives in this house, and you said yes, right? Now it’s eighteen. Okay, okay. You’re a tough cookie, you know that? Alright, so, the secret is about somebody in the house. Who could it be?
I’m gonna look inside your brain for a second. Oh. Is the person in the house Dimitri? Yes. Alright. And your mom, she knows what the secret is, yes? Okay. So, Huh, well I doubt the secret’s about Dinosaurs Or robots No See, the best secrets are always about money So
Are your mom and Dimitri stealing money? No, of course not! Okay, okay, okay. I’m sorry. I let my imagination get the best of me. Fifteen. Okay, fifteen.
Now auntie, I never said anything about inviting him on my honeymoon. The man just…
And yes, I have been gently stringing him along so that he doesn’t go chirping like some gossipy little bird to Gwen, and I finally get my windfall. Eye on the prize, baby. Correction. When we get our windfall, baby. Yeah. And that is only going to happen if you convince this barrister, Mr. Roth, that your marriage is legit.
Trust me. I can handle him. Hmm, can you? Because he called just before you got here, and he was very eager to see you and Gwen. So, nephew, how are you going to keep Gwen from finding out about your being an heir to a fortune when she has to meet the man who holds the purse strings
first? Come on in. Oh, hey, Alex. Hey, smells good in here. What you guys cooking? Um, yeah, just, um, You know, whipped up a little something something. Oh. Um, Stephanie told me that she was with you when you got the news about your uncle, Victor. I’m really sorry. Thank you, man. Yeah, it’s been a rough go on everyone.
I didn’t come by to horn in on your breakfast or whatever. I actually just came by to ask a small favor. Okay. Ask away. It’s your help. I need it again, Steph. You know, we have that meeting coming up with Yuri in a little while, and I figured since we’re working again on the Basic Black Project, maybe you could handle it solo.
Hey, you know, Alex, if you’re asking that because you’re worried about me getting jealous, I meant it when I told you that I’m not gonna try to, you know, keep you guys apart anymore. I appreciate that. That’s not why I’m asking.
So why are you asking, Alex? Do you have somewhere else you need to be? Um, no. I don’t know why. I mean, you’re the one running Basic Black. Shouldn’t you be the one that’s, is there? Yeah, I am running it, but um, you know, I’ll tell you guys the truth. I’m just not up for it, period. I am not up for anything these days.
Is that because of Victor?
You know what the last time I saw the old man was? It’s when I moved out of the house. He had given the job to Maggie that I thought I should have gotten. Did I act in a dignified way? Was I gracious? No. I was petty about it. It wasn’t just petty, I was bitter and angry and now I’m just like trying to find a way to live with that.
Because I know when I gave both him and Maggie the deep freeze, it hurt him. Even if he never showed it. I’m sorry that you’re struggling with that. And hey, don’t worry about the meeting. Take time for yourself. Thank you, Steph. So, then, um, then… What is gonna be your plan, Alex? Are you just gonna go back to your place and draw the blinds?
Wallow in your guilt?
That, that’s gonna be your solution?
Wait, wait, wait, wait. Sonny, come on, come on. Don’t just leave like that. Leo, I’ve been on a plane for hours, okay? I do not have the time nor the energy to deal with your act today. Act? Act? You think my sympathy, my grief over your uncle’s death is some sort of song and dance? I don’t know. It’s like you have this ongoing performance art shtick where nothing out of your mouth sounds remotely sincere.
That is so unfair. You know, I got weepy when I heard the news, which is huge for me, because my therapist and I have been talking about how I don’t have access to my tears. Well, I’m really glad you’re making progress in therapy, Leo. Please, make sure to invite me to your next silent meditation retreat. I cried because of you, Sonny.
Because I knew how sad this all made you. Is, is that, is that why you reached out? Okay, look, I’m bad about things like that. I’m sorry. But I know why you’re really upset with me. Do you? Of course I do. It’s because I helped Xander cover up what he did to Bonnie. But if you would just let me explain. You already did, Leo.
And I, I, really, I don’t want to hear it. And to be perfectly frank, I expect that kind of behavior from Xander. Alright? He’s a grade A con man. But you, you know, you keep talking about how you want to become a better person. But you just end up hurting people. Especially the people who care about you.
Bottom line, it’s always about you. What you want. What you need. And to hell with everyone else. What are you saying? That I’m a narcissist? I’m not a narcissist. Keep telling yourself that, buddy. Sonny! Sonny, there is a beating heart in here. I have feelings, emotions, just like anybody else. For instance, I just started volunteering at an animal shelter.
Come on, the thought of you picking up dog poop? Ew, no, I would never do that. But I walk the dogs, I pet them, stuff like that. If I was only concerned about myself, as you are insinuating… Then explain to me how it’s possible that I have fallen head over heels in love.
You’ve fallen head over heels in love? Mm hmm. Okay, and tell me, does this person even know that you exist? Uh, yes, they do. In fact, it’s quite serious. He’s rich, gorgeous, completely obsessed with me. Did I mention he looks like George Clooney, circuit ER? In a couple of years, he’s going to be the silver daddy in tartan pants I never knew I needed.
Now this all sounds very believable. Next, you’re gonna tell me you’re in a throuple with Ricky Martin. No, but that sounds amazing. Funny enough, my lover’s name is Matthew Perry. Oh my god, see, I knew you were Not the actor. Like, I would ever date him after the way he dissed Keanu in his memoirs. Plus, my Matthew Perry is way hotter than the Friends version.
Okay, well, keep on dreaming, Leo. And remember, just hit that snooze button on your arm. What are you saying? That you don’t believe me? You don’t think I could score someone like that? A ten out of ten? In a word? Uh, no. No, I don’t. Okay, fine. I’ll prove it to you. Here is his picture. Now what do you have to say?
I’m sure there’s a way to satisfy that lawyer’s needs without getting Gwen involved. Well, good luck with that. Roth called this morning and mentioned Gwen, specifically. Well,
I’m going to leave you, Mr. Von Leuschner, to figure out how you’re going to come clean with Mrs. Von Leuschner.
Why don’t you put the pen and paper down and let’s pause for a moment, shall we? Applications for Martin Prep aren’t generally considered over a plate of lukewarm eggs. If you want your daughter to attend, she’ll have to go through the application process, just like everyone else. I have just one question for you, Mr.
Roth. If I had a son instead of a daughter, would things be different? Mrs. DiMera, Martin Prep is open to all genders. Your son would have the same chance as any other applicant. It’s funny you say that, because Martin Prep is an all girls school.
Why don’t we drop that facade now, so you can tell me who you really are?
Okay, looks like I’m running out of guesses here. Does the secret have something to do with Dimitri and his new wife Gwen? Like, are they doing something together? No, she doesn’t know anything about it. Anything about what? Twelfth and last. Ah, okay. So Gwen doesn’t know. About the secret. Does that mean that cousin Dimitri is having a playdate with someone he should not be having a playdate with?
Do sleepovers count? Oh, sleepovers definitely count. Is cousin Dimitri having a sleepover with somebody? Yes. And who is he having a sleepover with? That’s not a yes or no question. Nine left. Nine questions about what?
Well, Rachel and I were just playing a super fun game of 20 questions. Oh, really? And what kind of questions were you being asked, sweetheart? Well, she can’t tell you that because it would ruin the surprise, right? Right. Right. Well, we wouldn’t want that, would we? No. Sweetheart, you know, Cook has made you some chocolate chip cookies.
Why don’t you go to the kitchen and see if they’re still warm? Oh, goody! Well, I guess you’re gonna have to live with the suspense. Guess so.
Dammit, Gabby, I hope to hell you are having better luck than I am. I wonder how the real headmaster of Martin Prep will feel when he finds out someone’s pretending to be him. Should we call the school, and maybe they can call the police? Okay, fine. I’m not the headmaster of Martin Preck. The truth is I’m an attorney.
And I’ve come to Salem to certify that the requirements laid out in the Von Leuchner Codicil are duly met. The Von Leuchner Codicil? Wait, wait, what the hell is that?
So, what do you think? Have I proven my point? Um, well, he’s got the correct number of nipples. Uh, belly button, that is a mighty fine torso. You’re Dayton Leo. Congratulations. Forget his nipples, look at those abs. It’s like the statue of David came to life and started cooking me goat cheese frittatas. Okay, so he does floor crunches for six hours a day at the gym.
Also, can someone please tell me why I’m still standing here? Because we’re… friends. Friends. Leo, my dad was a wreck when his wife Bonnie went missing. Bonnie, his wife, was a wreck when she was kidnapped. Those people are my family, man, and you, you, you didn’t give a damn. You betrayed our friendship. You betrayed me.
That comes with a cost.
Dimitri? Yes, my love. Did it not go well with Kristen? Uh, it… It went fine. Better than fine.
Something’s not right. Tell me. What’s troubling you?
Whatever it is, we can work it out. Together.
No, I wasn’t planning on wallowing, Chad. And was that really called for? Alex is in mourning. I’m not, I’m not trying to be insensitive. Okay, trust me, Alex, I know all too well what it’s like to want to isolate and shut yourself off from the world when you’re grieving. Believe me. But you gotta find a way to move through it.
Okay, now you said you haven’t been home since you moved out. Okay, so now is the time to go home. Okay, you fix things with Maggie. Okay, it’s too late to do it with Victor, so you smooth things out with her. And Victor loved Maggie more than anyone else on the planet. Okay, so you bury the hatchet with her, to make amends to him.
That’s how, that’s how you honor his memory.
You’re right. You’re right about all of it, thank you. You know what, I’m gonna head over there right now, actually. Seriously, thank you. Good luck.
What was that for? You’re a good man, Chad. That was exactly what Alex needed. Yeah, what’s that? A pep talk? No. A friend.
I don’t think I would cause friends. Not too soon for
that. If only Sonny could see Dimitri’s gorgeous, almost too symmetrical punim, or that other impressive part of his anatomy. Dammit, this isn’t like that time I told my co workers I was riding motorcycles across South America with Channing Tatum. Dimitri is real. And he’s way hotter than Sonny. Not to mention his dumb, hunky, unfortunately straight brother Alex.
Alex. Sonny boy. Oh man, are you a sight for sore eyes, huh? You too. Hey, Dad told me you moved out. What are you doing here? I did. I came by to see Auntie Mag. She’s napping, so I decided to hang around until she wakes up. God, I’m, I’m sure she’s gonna be thrilled to see you. Yeah, well, I’m not so sure about that.
There’s something that I need to.
I, I, I’m so sorry. Can I just have a second? I need to, to, to, to take care of this.
Is everything all right? Yes. Yes, everything is, is fine. Uh, it was Kristen. She, uh, she and I did a head count earlier when we were talking and we came to realize that we’re going to have to cut a deal with another shareholder if we want to get what we want. Oh, goodness me. Navigating through this family is like…
Tiptoeing through a minefield. Tell me about it. Gwen, I need to, uh, I need to go run an errand. I think it might help clear my head a bit. Yes, you go. You go. You, you do you, my darling. You, you’ve got this. Okay, thank you. And, uh, and I’ll see you soon.
I can’t wait to hear how you figure this out. You and me both.
Thank God you’re here. Gabby, Rachel and I, the game we were playing was interrupted by Kristen. We were so I know the secret.
So I decided to come here and try and make things right with Maggie. Maggie’s gonna need everyone’s help to get through this. I’m really glad you’re gonna be part of it. Yeah.
Wow, look at these.
I hope Alex takes your advice. And why wouldn’t he? He was great. And caring. I’m really proud of you for extending yourself to him that way. Well, it’s a good thing I didn’t listen to my sister Kristen then. What do you mean? Yesterday when I left you two, uh, together, she said that I was making a huge mistake.
That, that, um, no matter what, I shouldn’t trust, uh, I shouldn’t trust Alex with you, no matter what. That’s what she said. Well, that’s just cynical. And no surprise coming from her. You know, sometimes I think your family doesn’t know how to be happy unless they’re… Stirring up drama. Yeah, that’s true. DVO, as I live and breathe, what are you doing here?
I got your text. We have a problem. What? I told you I didn’t tell anyone about us, not a soul. No, no, Don’t tell me that lawyer figured everything out. Oh, I haven’t even met with him yet. But if I can’t figure out everything in fast, it’s all over.
So the guy just came clean? See, the incentive to keep quiet isn’t as strong for Mr. Roth as it is for Kristen. See, he’s only here because it’s a job. So he told you that there’s a boatload of money out there and all Dimitri has to do is claim it? Yeah, and all that creep needs to do is prove that his marriage to Gwen is real.
Huh. This has Kristen written all over it. So Dimitri is cutting her in for a share. Maybe he has to. Cause maybe she’s the one that knows who he’s having sleepovers with. Ha! My nephew has a side piece. And all we have to do is figure out her name. And then, we’re in the driver’s seat. I was this close to telling Gwen everything.
Dammit, Leo, it was on the tip of my tongue! No, no, no, listen to me. Believe me, I know Gwen. She would not take this well. I mean, that, that is an understatement. She would absolutely plot. If she finds out you have been lying to her from the very beginning… As have I a little bit. Okay, a lot. Yes, yes, I know she would be horrified, but listen to me, Leo.
There was something that you said in that text earlier that gave me an idea. Fake it until you make it, right? Right. Right. Well, the terms of that damn codice will say that I need a wife to get my inheritance, but never once does it say that it has to be Gwen. It doesn’t have to be Gwen. What, what are you suggesting?
Because polygamy’s been illegal in this country for quite some time now. No, that’s not what I’m saying. What I’m saying is… What if we found someone to pose as Gwen? It’s not going to be easy. I’m going to have to invent all sorts of corroborating evidence to back it up. But if I can pull this part off, that pompous lawyer will walk out straightening his tie satisfied.
I will get that money and Gwen will be none the wiser. Okay. So, who do you have in mind to impersonate Gwen? Because not only do you have to sell this relationship to the lawyer, it has to be somebody you know for sure will keep their mouth shut. I’m just worried somebody’s gonna try and blackmail you.
Yeah, I know. I know, I know, I know, I know. I need someone that I can trust. That I can trust implicitly.
What about me? Dammit, Gwen? Okay, you
seem really upset. Well, I am upset. Why on earth wouldn’t I be upset? Oh, right. I assume that Dimitri told you everything.
Told me everything? What are you talking about?