General Hospital Transcript
Transcript provided by Suzanne
THIS STILL NEEDS EXTENSIVE EDITING!
Can’t sleep too deep nowhere right
baby, thinking of you keeps me up all night ned. I… I… hello, you.
[ Chuckles ] Welcome. Yeah, I, uh — I second that welcome. It’s good to see you. Yeah, um, this guy, chase — he, uh, persuaded me, said, uh, it would be a good idea to pay a visit. Chase, you made this happen? Thank you. I’m just trying to help out. Hi. Uh, yeah, we haven’t met yet. I’m — I’m cody. I work with the horses in the stables. Nice to meet you, cody. Of course a house this big would have horse stables. This is your home. No. No, no, no.
[ Chuckles ] Living in a mansion like this, uh, definitely not my style. So is this just a drive-by? You’re not staying? No, I’m not. Well, if that’s the case, then you just turn around and leave right now. What do you want, gregory? I’d like to have a few words with you about how you meddled in chase’s life. I have less than zero interest in a lecture from you, professor chase. Then it’s a damn good thing I’m no longer teaching. Really? You retired? Something like that. I’m now on the editorial board of the invader. Oh, I see. Now you can tell even more people what to think. Well, save your breath, because I’m not apologizing for helping my granddaughter. Would you please just stop talking for five seconds so that I can say thank you? Is kristina here? Well, hello to you, too. No, kristina’s not here. Good. Why? Do you want to find kristina or not? Oh, I want to find her alright. I’m just not sure what I’d do if I did, which is why I came here. I-I need you to help me resist temptation. Help! So, what’s our next move? ‘Cause I want you as safe as possible while we try to lure out the person who’s trying to kill you. Okay, so I’ve already arranged for the townhouse’s security to have a pretty significant upgrade. Not that I think that it’s very likely that someone’s going to attack me here in my home, because it’s obviously so specific to me. Whereas if someone is trying to assassinate me at a public pool, that leaves a lot of questions like, was I the target? Was it sonny? Was it someone else? Whereas if you try to kill me in my own home, I’m 100% obviously the target. Right, but I like the idea of heightened security in here, because you never can be too careful. No, no, I completely disagree. The point is for us to make the enemy believe that they can get to me. Do you see? Right.
[ Doorbell rings ] So that’s what I intend to do. Hang on. Hold that thought. Yeah. Yeah. Hey. Uh, any chance you’ve heard from felicia? Jackpot! Man: Freeze! Put your hands where I can see them. I’ll take my file back now. I-I-I acted very impulsively at — at the restaurant, and — and I’m so very sorry. Look, there’s no need for handcuffs, really. I think we can work this out together. Let’s see which one of my files has you so interested. The maquillage. Really, you couldn’t find a way to keep him occupied for five whole minutes? What?! We drank an entire bottle of wine. I was stalling. What were you doing? Did you just lay down and take a nap? I want to know what you were both doing here in my office, trying to steal my confidential client file. Well, to be honest, I wasn’t trying to steal it. I just wanted to read it. Oh, well, then… ray, you got another pair of handcuffs there? I want this one arrested for breaking and entering, and this one — oh, this one committed straight-up fraud.
I can’t believe molly overheard kristina say that she wanted to be a surrogate for molly and tj’s baby. Talk about bad timing. Well, unfortunately, molly didn’t stick around long enough for kristina to tell her that she thought it was bad timing. Well, did you explain that to molly? It wasn’t a good time. She and tj had been up all night while curtis was in surgery. Well, at least we know that he’s out of surgery safely. Right. So I’m just gonna sit down right next to you… okay. …And I am going to do my best to let molly and kristina work this out on their own. Okay. I have no text messages from either of them. Well, molly’s text messages have been silenced. Because she doesn’t want to hear from anybody. You know, this is not exactly staying out of it. Well, y-you are staying out of it. I’m low-key offering support here. Kristina is replying. Look, I didn’t want to come here in the first place. Chase talked me into it. So if I’m not welcome here, I don’t see any reason why I should stay. No, no, no. Wait, wait. No, no. We — we, um — we do want you here. No, no. Not if he’s gonna just turn around and walk out again. He cannot keep dropping in and out of leo’s life. It is too confusing. Well, brook lynn texted me and said that leo got hurt riding comet. That’s why eddie and I are here. Right. How’s the kid doing? Is he okay? His leg is gonna heal just fine. But like I said, he is confused, and eddie showing up like this is just gonna make things worse. Well, then we agree. I should leave. I only agreed to come because chase convinced me that I might be able to help this kid understand the situation better. I really don’t see how that’s possible when I don’t even understand it myself. Cody: Mama q, could — could I have a word with you for a minute? Will you just stay, talk to me? Just for a few minutes, I swear. Sure, I can do that. I’m, uh — I’m really glad that chase convinced you to stop by. I know olivia is really glad, too. She just needs a few minutes to figure that out. Huh. I’m not so sure about that. But you seem charming enough, so I won’t go just yet. Thank you. Unless that woman, tracy, who says she’s my mother, if she comes around, forget it. I mean, she is really, really intense, so if she comes around, I’m — I’m out of here. Where’s tracy? Uh, she’s probably harassing some other person in rice plaza. You want to thank me for meddling in your son’s life? Yes. I’m grateful for what you did, regardless of your motives. Chase would never be happy if he didn’t get his badge back. Being a detective is his calling. So I’m glad you did… whatever you did that convinced the ccrb to give him a second hearing. I’m confident chase got his badge back on his own merits, but if you hadn’t interfered, he may never have had that chance. Huh. But chase is upset that I interfered. Because chase believes in following the rules. He’s always been like that. Uh-huh, and if he’s such a rule-follower, what is he doing with brook lynn? I mean, my family motto is basically, “we’re quartermaines. Rules don’t apply.” That may be the case, but I think chase has finally found the woman he’s willing to bend the rules for. Dante. What are you doing here? Mac, hey. Uh… I just stopped by to ask anna about a few more questions about the shooting at the pool. So, I have not seen felicia. Is something wrong? She’s out of town on a case. I didn’t know she was a P.I. Again. Yeah, it caught me by surprise, too. She didn’t tell me who her client was, but it has something to do with martin grey. Martin? Ugh. And lucy’s out of town, too. I guess that means something. I’m guessing nothing good.
[ Folder thuds ] I think if we just stop, take a deep breath, we can find a civilized way to deal with this. I barely know this woman. I thought you said she was your sister. What can I say? We’re just not that close.
[ Chuckling ] Oh. You know what I think the more likely scenario is? You wanted to drag dinner out to give blondie here the time to crack my safe. And when I got suspicious and wanted to leave, you assaulted me. I did no such thing. You tried to push me down the stairs. No, I d– I wouldn’t do that. You, sir, you tripped. And then ray, then — then she stole my car keys from the valet. That’s because you had a lot more to drink than I did, and I was just trying to save you — who are you — I was trying to save you from a dui. Excuse me. We both had wine to drink. Who are you kidding? Oh, come — he — he had more — you had a lot more than I did. He had a lot more than I did. And if you don’t — you don’t believe me, go ahead, give him one of those things. The tubes, you know, the — the things. Breathalyzer. Breathalyzer. Thank you. Why… am I attracted to these fiery women? I… ray, if you please. Put out your hands.
[ Handcuffs clicking ]
I’m telling you, I would call for backup. These two are either going to try to divide and conquer… lucy, how did jack get on to you? That — that is not important right at this moment. What’s important is we got to get the heck out of here. Um… hey, mr. Policeman guy. Hi. You know, um, do you realize who this is? This is the wife of the police commissioner of port charles. Lucy, no. Yes. And you could kind of maybe take it easy on us as perhaps a professional courtesy. Do not drag mac into this. There is no way I’m admitting to him I was arrested. Listen, don’t — don’t be mad at ray. He’s just doing his job. I’m the one pressing charges. Um, yoo-hoo, mr. Policeman? Um, don’t we get one phone call each? I suppose you do. Thank you. Yes, we do. Okay, um…
[Whispers] I know exactly who we’re gonna call. What the hell does “tl” mean? Oh, that’s millennial code for “talk later.” I miss actual words. Yeah, me too. Do you really think that molly is that upset that kristina offered to be their surrogate? I think molly is just plain upset. I don’t know how much of it is about kristina or how much of it is about the fact that she has fertility issues. Well, I was afraid kristina’s offer would cause friction. Yeah, well, at least everything is out in the open now. Like I said, I’m gonna do everything I can to make sure that they work this out themselves. Hey. Oh, hey. Hi. Hi. Sorry if I’m, uh, interrupting anything. Uh, no, not at all. It’s a nice night. I think I’ll go for a walk. Yeah, well, thanks for coming by, mom. You’re welcome. “Tl.” Oh, yeah. You’re very cute.
[ Exhales deeply ] How was your day?
[ Keys jingle ] Um, very, uh, busy. Busy? Yeah? Yes. Interesting case? Yeah, um… about that. I-I think it’s time I fill you in on what I’ve been doing. So, where did felicia go? I don’t know. All I know is she took a short flight. Okay, and when was the last time you heard from her? She texted me to say she landed safely early this morning, but nothing since then. Alright, so not so long. Yeah, but I can’t shake the feeling that she’s in trouble, especially if she’s with lucy.
[ Cellphone rings ] Yeah, I know. Thank god. Hi, felicia? I’m here with mac. We were just talking about you. You’re with mac? Uh-huh. I-I’m going to put you on speaker.
[ Beep ] Here. I’m starting to worry about you. Hi, mac. What a surprise. Is something wrong? Oh, no, there’s nothing wrong. I-I was just remembering that I was supposed to have drinks with anna tonight. Tell him. Tell him! I’m sorry. I-I don’t remember us having plans. Oh, well, I must have got my days mixed up. Sorry to bother you. Anna? Anna, it’s me. Hey, could you please, please, please call your friend jackson montgomery and just tell him not to arrest us? Who’s going to arrest you? I knew it! I thought that you wanted ned here. Yes, I want ned here, not… eddie. Leo cannot deal with his father acting like he doesn’t even know who he is. Okay, look, hey. No one wants to see leo getting any more upset, but, I mean, maybe, maybe instead of kicking eddie out, take this opportunity to talk to him, you know? You can make plans to see each other outside of the main q house. Um, I mean, clearly, eddie showed up today because he cares about leo’s injury. Now — now, he may not know that he’s leo’s dad, but it’s still a good sign, right? Maybe. God, I don’t know. I don’t know. I-I wanted ned here because I thought that maybe being around here, being around things that are familiar would help, you know, would jog a memory or something. And I still think that that’s a good plan. But I have got to put leo first. You know, brook lynn is a grown woman and it still hurts her that her father doesn’t seem to know who she is. But leo — he’s just a little kid. If we — if we can’t handle this, how the hell can he? Okay, well, maybe — maybe eddie could take my room above the stables. You know, that way, he’s still on the grounds, but it’d be a lot easier to keep him and leo separate. You mean — you mean, uh, you would — would take a guest room here in the house and then he would stay in your room? Sure, yeah, I could do that. Or I’ll just bunk with dante and sam. You know, I’ll figure something out. You’re a good man, cody bell. Thank you. That’s kind of funny when you stop and think about it. You were challenged by another busker? Yeah, and I would have won, too. People want to hear classic rock. They don’t want to hear grunge. But tracy stormed in before we could have the sing-off. Dad, you’re home!
Na tell me somethingI’m not gonna like? Because you’re probably not.
[ Sighs ] Oh, good. Look, I know that cody was your camp buddy and the two of you had a really strong bond, so I was pretty worried about him after he got arrested for supposedly stealing gladys’ bracelet at the nurses’ ball. Yeah, I was worried about him, too, but then, charges were dropped. He’s in the clear. I’m, uh — I’m not so sure about that. Oh. Before the charges were dropped, spinelli and i tried to help cody prove that gladys wasn’t a victim. According to cody, she tried to set him up for another crime. Wait, was it you and spinelli? You guys are the ones that — that found the waiter that got cody exonerated? No, um — no, but I’m pretty sure I-I know who did it, and it is shady times a thousand. Oh. Well, who? Selina wu. Jackson montgomery. I never thought I’d hear your voice again. Well, me neither, but I must say, it’s a very pleasant surprise, anna. Listen, I did tell lucy that I knew you, but i in no way suggested we had any kind of personal or professional relationship. And there you have it. Well, lucy doesn’t really pay attention to the finer details. She’s more of a big-picture girl.
[ Laughs ] Yeah, so I’ve found out. But what’s going on with her? I mean, I know she runs a successful cosmetics company. So what is she doing here running a scam on me? And is felicia scorpio
really the wife of the port charles police commissioner? Yes, that last part is true, and she does work as a P.I. Ah, I see. Well, that explains that. What’s lucy’s excuse? Do you mind telling me the middle part again? Sure, lucy came in claiming she was recently widowed and, uh, felicia was her sister. Mac: You said
you were sisters? Yeah, felicia said we were sisters, and she even said our last name was “martin.” And then hummingbird cake got mentioned, and that sort of really blew my cover.
Hummingbird cake? Hummingbird cake? Yes, hummingbird cake, because the restaurant we went to happened to serve hummingbird cake, which is really odd, because most restaurants don’T. But he said, jackson said, “I don’t like hummingbird cake,” which made me really mad, because that’s martin’s
favorite food. And so then I said, “you would like hummingbird cake if you ever had the proper recipe.” But apparently he had had hummingbird cake, because he knew martin’s family recipe. Believe it or not, one of my most contentious divorce cases involved a recipe for hummingbird cake. The wife was my client, and she was threatening to divulge the recipe to little debbie’s for mass production. And I bet the husband in that case was martin grey, and he didn’t like that idea. Well, I’ll put it to you this way. The husband just hated the idea so much that I knew I could get sole custody for my client of the couple’s beach house in miami if I could just get her to sign an nda saying she’d never divulge the recipe. And martin’s mother guards that hummingbird cake recipe like it was gold in fort knox. And let me guess, once jack connected lucy to martin, it was all over. I’m sorry you couldn’t get through to your son earlier. Wow! You do always eavesdrop on private conversations. I-I couldn’t help but hear it. Y-you were both speaking very loudly. Yeah, well, not loud enough to get through to my son. You certainly did all you could. And what? I should just give up? Oh, gee, my son doesn’t remember his family. Maybe he will someday. What’s for dinner? You know, you really make conversations hard, don’t you? Because that’s not at all what I meant. Quartermaines don’t give up. You may be satisfied to stand idly by and watch your son face-plant again and again like some larry, curly, or moe, but I’m not like you. You can abandon your son. Go right ahead. I’m not going to abandon mine. And as usual, you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. So, kid, how’s your — how’s your leg? It hurts, but only if I run. Not that I should have to say this, but then, uh, stop running. Actually, honey, why don’t you go on up to your bedroom, okay? Which is cooler, an octopus or a squid? Which is cooler? Um… I guess I’d say an octopus. No, that’s not right, and my dad would know the answer. You’re really not my dad, are you? No, I’m not. Then who are you?
Why would selina wu want to help cody? I-I don’t know. But do you know that the pcpd has been running surveillance at the savoy? Well, yeah, I know, but how do you know? I ran into mac earlier, and mac knows about selina’s high-stake illegal poker game in the back room. Okay, well, that explains it then. If there is a poker game, cody’s gonna sniff it out. I mean, that’s what happened to him last year when he got beat up. He was supposed to take the bus out of town. He missed his bus, and that was because of a poker game. Okay, well, do you think it was selina’s? He didn’t say whose game it was, but it could very well have been selina’s game. See? I told you this was shady. I don’t like it. I think it’s pretty highly likely that it was selina’s guys that beat up cody when he first came into town, so it’s troubling to think that cody is more connected to her now. Ohh, cody bell, what are you up to now, man? I would like to apologize for my friends. I am so, so sorry that you got caught in the middle of all of this, but at the end of the day, you know, was there any real harm done? Anna, did you not hear me say that felicia was going through my confidential client files? Okay, let me throw that name out there again — martin grey. She wasn’t going through any other files, was she? Well, not that I can tell, but who the hell knows what she saw? Well, I can vouch for my friend. If she was there with lucy, she was only looking at martin’s files. Yeah, okay. I’m — I’m gonna need a little bit more. Like, what’s the interest in martin grey? Well… lucy’s dating him. I mean, I look upon this as a lover’s quarrel. You could see for yourself that they’re not really criminal masterminds. Could you see your way to… dropping the charges? Jackson, I would be forever in your debt, without a doubt. Um, see, jack knows the officer that is arresting us, and he convinced him to check with his office before he took us to be booked. Okay, but why did you take his car keys? Uh…well, I didn’t — I didn’t mean to. I mean, it was sort of a panic moment. Is that what you want to hear? Yes, okay? I panicked. I panicked. I didn’t mean to steal the car. I just — I was doing it kind of as a public service thing. Felicia, take me off speaker.
[ Beep ] I’m sorry. I really didn’t want to involve you in this. And that’s why you called anna instead of me? Well, I-I just — I didn’t want you to worry. How angry are you? I just want you home safe. I guess that depends on how well anna negotiated on our behalf. I just hope she’s convincing. It really is past your bedtime, leo, okay? You look like my dad, but you don’t know about squids. So who are you? I’m eddie maine. I’m a musician. Is that true? Yeah, at least for the time being. I’m sorry that that’s confusing for you. People always confuse me, but my dad knows squids are the coolest and you got it wrong.
[ Chuckles ] You’re right. I don’t know the first thing about squids or octopuses. Octopi. Right, octopi. I do know that octopi have eight legs. How many legs do squids have? They don’t have legs. They have 10 limbs — 8 arms and 2 tentacles. The biggest squid is 60 feet and the biggest octopus is only about 30 feet. Wow. I always thought that octopi were bigger. Mama q, leo’s got this. I was so happy when you walked through that door. Does this mean you’re still talking to me? You mean after I figured out that tracy was pulling strings with the ccrb? Yeah. So my kiss goodbye didn’t convince you? No, I was so happy when you kissed me. Oh, my gosh. It went such a long way. I just — I was worried that after you left and thought about it, maybe… no. I’m not doing that anymore. Doing what? Look, I know that I’m a by-the-book guy, and maybe that sounds good on paper, but in real life, I need to learn to be more accepting that life is complicated and it’s messy, and that is okay. Well, look, you know me, and — and you’re by the book, then I am a leap-before-I-look kind of person. Look what i did with valentin, pretended to be pregnant with his baby? That was crazy. No, brook lynn, what you did was gutsy and it was brave and it was pretty magnificent. A plan that complicated and messy wouldn’t have occurred to me in a million years, and that is why I think our differences make us such a good team. And that’s what I’m trying to say, brook lynn. I don’t want you to feel like I am constantly judging you. Because I love you, brook lynn, exactly the way that you are. I love you, too, mr. By-the-book. You have no right to judge me. You don’t even know me. Isn’t it infuriating when someone just inserts themselves into your private conversations and starts doling out advice? I’m not giving out advice. I was — I was offering understanding. I saw how ned’s rejection hurt you. You saw no such thing. Do not project your disappointment with your sons on me. And who are you to give me parenting advice? I know full well that finn didn’t speak to you for decades. I don’t even know why I tried. I’m gonna leave you to the one person who can tolerate your poisonous tongue. You.
[ Laughs ] So much for your self-righteous exit. Not as effective when you have to fumble around for your keys. I got it. I got it. It’s okay. I got it.
I have been waiting to do that all night. I’m so glad. And at the risk of ruining the mood, I am ready to tell you everything that I have been up to with my grandmother. I don’t want to keep anything from you. No. Uh, I’m gonna stop you right there. I actually think it’s better if you don’t tell me everything. Really? Yeah. I’m gonna trust that you tell me what I need to know, just like I’ll trust that you’ll come to me if you’re in trouble. Deal. Thank you for bringing my dad home. Yeah, I was kind of worried that it was the right thing to do, but, uh… leo seemed okay. Yeah. So how bad was grandmother? Oh, you know, she took the, uh, bulldozer approach. She always does.
[ Chuckles ] What’s going on? I’m helping out a friend. No one should have to face you alone in this state. What state? You ready to get out of here? Definitely. Let’s go. What nerve. I’m kind of surprised that mac is sharing police business with a civilian. Well, I think he did it because he’s worried about cody. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Do you know how long they’ve been running surveillance at the savoy? It’s got to be three, four months. Don’t you think that’s a long time? I do. I mean, normally you got to have results in three, four weeks if you want to keep something like that going. Well, I think mac doesn’t want cody to get arrested before he takes down selina’s illegal poker game. So mac’s trying to protect cody. As much as he can. Hmm. Mac said it was because he loved dominique and cody is her son, but I think there’s more to it. I think that mac was disappointed when the paternity test came back and it revealed that mac was not cody’s dad. Did you know the brown-throated three-toed sloth naps up to 16 hours a day and its arms are twice as long as its legs? I did not know that. You sure do know a lot. I know all animals and I love them all, even though cody likes horses best. Hey, I do love my horses, but I like other animals, too. Just not beetles. Ugh. No, never beetles. Never.
[ Laughs ] My mom likes feeding me.
[ Laughs ] That is true. What do you like? Ned: What do I like? Mm-hmm. Um… yeah. I like music. That’s my dad’s guitar. Uh, would it bother you if I played it? I’ll give it right back. I’m still learning how to play it. Are you any good? Wow. That’s really good.
[ Laughs ] So you can play it, at least until my dad gets back. At least… I think he’s coming back. Go ahead and uncuff them, ray. I won’t be pressing charges. I’m sorry for wasting your time. Thank you so much, jack. Triple — triple that. Triple “thank you” for me. I’ve been around the block a couple of times. I know love can make you do crazy things. I believe this is yours, doc. Thank you. Yeah. Well, looks like I’m going to have to get a better safe, huh?
[ Chuckles ] Good night, ladies. Tell me. Tell me all of this wasn’t for nothing. Did you get something useful? Tell me. I’m not sure how much this will help, but I did find out who’s responsible for the shell corporation that’s been depositing money, $50,000, every month in martin’s account. Okay. Who is it?
I’m gonna sit for a while. Are you okay?
[ Sighs ] Yeah. Thank you, alexis. I-I just couldn’t get my fingers to work. Are you gonna be alright to drive home? Yeah, the spasm should ease up soon. Um, I’m just gonna sit here till it’s gone. I’m fine, really. It’s a lovely night. You mind if I join you? No. I’d like that.
[ Guitar strums ] Hey, leo, it really is time for bed, okay? Aw. Are you staying? No, no, I’m — I’m staying at sonny’s house. Oh, I know uncle sonny. He’s cool. Yeah, he is pretty cool. Good night, eddie. Good night, leo. And thank you for teaching me all about animals. Okay, let’s go. I’ll be up there in a minute. Put on your jammies, okay? Hey, um, look, I don’t mean to push, but — but there is a — there is an apartment over the horse stables. You — you could stay there if you’re not comfortable staying here in the main house. Well, that’s — that’s very nice of you, um, but I’m okay at sonny’s house. Okay, fair enough.
[ Chuckles, sniffles ] Well, thank you for being so kind to leo. Of course. He’s a sweet kid. I mean, look, I don’t want to hurt anyone. I just want to live my life. Right. And I just want my husband back. Eddie, why don’t I take you back to sonny’s? Yeah.
[ Door opens, closes ]
[ Crying ] W-why would martin’s horrible ex-wife number three be depositing 50k in his account every month? Why would any ex send monthly payments? Ew. Martin’s getting alimony?
[ Gasps ] Hello, I just thought you should know that lucy coe and her private investigator were here today asking questions about martin and maquillage. I think that mac wants to give cody a heads up, but since he can’t interfere in his own investigation, he tipped me off to his surveillance of selina. So he wants you to try to get cody to stop playing in selina’s poker games.
[ Sighs ] So should I do what mac can’t? Do I warn cody before he gets arrested?
[ Sighs ] Oh, god. What happened now? Eddie maine paid us a visit. Chase is driving him back to sonny’s now. Ned was here and you let him go? I’m gonna take that as my cue to go. Good luck. Good luck. We can’t keep the man prisoner here, tracy. Well, that’s because you lack imagination. Okay, you know what? I’ve had enough for one night. I’m gonna make this really clear. I will no longer spy for you. Good, then I am going to tell chase that you committed corporate espionage. You can’t do that without admitting your own guilt. Look, if you take me down, I will take you down with me. Face it, you need to find another way to get info on deception. Good thing I have one.
On the next “General Hospital” —