GH Transcript Tuesday, February 14, 2023

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Transcript provided by Suzanne

THIS STILL NEEDS EXTENSIVE EDITING!

so before we get this ball rolling, I must ask a question that we all know the answer to already, but I’m gonna ask it anyway. Can anyone here show just cause why these two should not be joined in holy matrimony? Speak now or forever hold your peace.

[ Laughter ] Tell curtis that trina might be his daughter. If you do it now before the wedding, it gives you a fighting chance. But if curtis finds out later on his own, you’ll lose him, portia, just like I did. “Speak every man truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.” How long have you known? I don’t know anything for sure. But you suspect. Yes. Curtis and portia’s affair would line up with how old trina is.

[ Knock on door ] Evening, grandpa. Know what day it is? Does it matter? They’re all the same in this hellhole. Of course it matters. It’s only the most romantic day of the year. Happy valentine’s from meemaw. But don’t worry. That’s not your only gift. Chocolate-covered strawberries? Oh, no. Something much sweeter. A way out of here for the four of us. Well, at least there weren’t any cows this time.

[ Chuckles ] It was definitely an improvement from the ride to the b&B. It was. We just got to keep you on the left side of the road. You mean the wrong side of the road. Not in england. I haven’t noticed that you have offered to drive yet. Cause I haven’T. You noticed that? Yeah? Then why don’t you keep your mouth zipped, falconeri? Alright, fair enough. Well… so, do you think this is the place? Well, it’s worth a shot, right? What if maggie isn’t even a drinker? Then hopefully someone who knows her is a drinker. Let’s go.

[ Mid-tempo music plays ] Welcome. Can I help you? Uh, yeah, we’re counting on it. Silence.

[ Chuckles ] That’s what we like to hear — or not hear, as the case may be. Now, as per tradition, I will pose the same question to you. Curtis, portia, do either of you know of any reason why you should not be joined in holy matrimony? More silence. Okay. Um, let’s get these two hitched. Man: Whoo-hoo!

[ Light laughter ]


Will you, portia,take curtis as your husband, to love, comfort, and honor him, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, as long as you both shall live?

[ Sniffles ] I will. And will you, curtis, take portia as your wife, to love, comfort, and honor her, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, for as long as you both shall live? I will. And to the family and friends, will you promise to do your best to support portia and curtis in their new union? Together: We will. Yes, we will! You hear that? Surrounded by love and support. You’re truly blessed. Warning — what I have might be contagious. Diagnosis? Very bad case of second-guessing myself. Mm. Well, I think I’ll take the risk. I see someone’s been drawing comfort from the good book. Trying to, anyway. Not much success. I just hate all these unanswered questions. Such as? Am I doing the right thing staying away from the wedding? Or is hiding out here just plain cowardly? Okay, well, stella henry is no coward. You love your nephew and you want him to be happy. Two things we have in common. I made it by myself in arts and crafts. They wouldn’t let me use scissors, of course, so I… had to improvise.

[ Laughs ] Oh, you’re all heart. Don’t you forget it. You’re gonna owe me huge when we blow this joint. Speaking of “we,” who’s the fourth?

[ Scoffs ] Esme’s baby. Duh. You’re really gonna have to work on your grandfathering skills when we hit the road. We’ll have plenty of time for that. Sounds like you have it all figured out. Down to the very last detail. And our daughter’s on board? You know, you never even mentioned how beautiful the d– esme doesn’t know… does she? Two of your finest ales, please. Well, that’s a matter of opinion, isn’t it? Uh, yeah. Sure is. Yours. Alright, then. Two of my favorite ales… okay. …Coming right up. -Excellent. -Thank you. So, what brings you to my little village? Certainly not on any of those fancy tourist sites. No, actually, we are drawn to, like, out-of-the-way places, the kind of towns you can get lost in. Oh. Mm. Well, then you’ve come to the right spot. Hmm. Wow. That was fast. Thank you. Yes, cheers. Cheers, baby. Mm-hmm. Mmm. Oh, that’s great. That is delicious. I’m glad you like it. Yeah. Is there anything else I can help you with? Uh, you know, now that you’ve asked, uh, we’re — we’re looking to find a friend of a friend. Mm-hmm. Well, that might be easier to do if this friend of a friend had a name. Oh, uh, yeah, uh, maggie. Maggie fitzgerald. Curtis and portia would like to say a few words to each other. Curtis, why don’t you start? My love…

[ Sighs ] It’s been a long and winding road with us. First we were together. And then we were apart. Thankfully, now we’re back together. And I don’t doubt that that journey took a toll on us and others. But some of those others have blessed us. And for that, I’m eternally grateful. What I’ve learned about love, it ain’t always pretty. Certainly not easy, but nothing worth having ever is. But this… honey, this is everything. Portia, I vow to love you with all my heart, to give you all I have and all I am to make our lives and the lives of the people we treasure… …better.

[ Chuckles ] This is my vow to you. Laura: Portia? You’re up.


You mentioned a long and winding road. I know it well. I thought that I would be traveling that road with my daughter. And she and my work was all that I would ever need.

[ Voice breaking ] And I was fine with that. But then you came back into my life. And you literally saved my life. And trina’S. And all of a sudden, I-I-I couldn’t imagine a world without you in it. Honey, your courage, your kindness, your conviction, all of it, it — it literally leaves me breathless. No one can make me laugh like you do. Or cry like you do. Hey.

[ Laughs ] No, it’s in a good way.

[ Laughs ] It’s in the best possible way.

[ Exhales shakily ] You just make me want to do and be better. And you have no idea how thankful I am to you for that. Honey, you’re a part of me. And I can’t imagine a world… without you in it. And, um… that’s, um… um… th-that’s why I, um… um… uh… baby, what is it? Uh…

[ Chuckles nervously ] It just feels like we’re damned if we do and we’re damned if we don’T. And I’m terrified that no matter how this plays out, curtis’s heart is gonna be broken either way. Maybe temporarily. But you’re forgetting that curtis loves trina. ‘Course, he might be shocked if it turns out that she’s his daughter. But once that settles — you know your nephew — he’ll be thrilled. Yes, but that blessing comes with a price. He’ll realize that portia’s been lying to him about the possibility for decades. A possibility she didn’t want to face. Portia was looking out for taggert. The man adores trina and has been an amazing father to her. I understand that. Telling the truth had the potential to upend a lot of lives. And then once curtis and portia got back together, trina was going through so much. But m-maybe it wasn’t time then. But — but once they set a date, o-once they decided to join their lives together and — and become a family? I keep praying about this, jordan. But heaven help me, I do not know if prayer is enough. Qu ite the handy one-handed man,aren’t you?

[ Laughs ] Esme will be told when the time is right. Now, can we please just leave the family spats for the road trip? Road trip? Did I stutter? Every law enforcement agency from here to alaska will be looking for us. Yeah, but they’ll be looking for three escaped fugitives, not a happy family cruising in an rv, listening to the radio. Can you picture it? No. Why are you being so negative? Because esme has kind of outgrown a baby seat. Oh. We’ll be needing one of those for the rv. She’s an adult pregnant woman who’s lost her memory. Do you really think she’s gonna let you throw her into the back of an rv? Don’t worry your pretty little head about it. You’re the one who said I’ve already got it all figured out. Then tell me the plan. You can’t be too careful, especially with that detective and his girlfriend trying to track down esme’s nanny. In your condition, I doubt you’re gonna be the one doing the driving. So why don’t you just sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride? Maggie fitzpatrick, did you say? No, fitzgerald, and we are — we’re — we’re not here to make trouble for her. No, in fact, just the opposite. We’re trying to find someone she was close to. Maggie was this person’s nanny. Yeah, there was a family in london that she used to work for, and they said that she moved to this village. I do recall a woman who said she once worked as a nanny, but she didn’t call herself maggie. Oh, what was the name? Ah, yes. Marjorie. Do you — do you know where to find her? Oh, not a clue. Marjorie only came here for trivia night on thursdays. You must be awesome at that.

[ Laughing ] Oh, no. I’m awful at trivia. But marjorie was fantastic. A walking encyclopedia, really. But then she stopped showing up, so we figured she’d moved on. Well, maybe she left a clue to where she was going and you didn’t even notice it. Please, this is really important to us that we find her. Why? Because a woman that she once cared for — esme — is in trouble. Esme? Uh, yeah. Esme prince is her name. Did maggie — or, um, marjorie ever mention her? Portia? It’s okay. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry. I-it’s just hitting me all over again that I’m not just marrying you. I am marrying you and your beautiful family. Now they’re your family, too. And mine is yours. And that road of ours, it does not stop here. We travel it, all of us, together. Together.


[ Sighs ] With this ring, I pledge to love you today… tomorrow [Sighs] And always.

[ Chuckles ] With this ring, I pledge all my love. And like this ring has no end, neither does my love for you. Laura: With vows and rings, you have given yourselves to each other. Therefore, by the power vested in me by the state of new york — and with the blessing of all your family and friends — I pronounce you husband and wife. You know what to do.

[ Laughter ] Oh, I certainly do.

[ Cheers and applause ] Oh. Um, I almost forgot. Your valentine’s present. Go on, take it. What’s the catch?

[ Scoffs ] Are you always this suspicious? Yes.

[ Sighs ] It’s my valentine’s gift to you. But just remember, you got to keep it hidden before the big escape. You do recall that I’m supposed to be in a fugue state, unable to speak or move, let alone wield a weapon. But that’s only till we get to the gate. Once we’re outside those walls, you can be your old self again. But if something goes wrong, then I’m caught holding a knife. And you’re caught holding esme’s hand and claiming that I hijacked you. I mean… everyone needs a backup plan, right? Marjorie never talked about her charges. Are you — are you positive? Why so invested in this esme person? She’s in, uh, uh, quite a bit of trouble back in the states. What kind of trouble? The kind that maggie would probably be the key to getting her out of. You know what? Um, look. Look, I-I get it. We showed up out of nowhere. You have absolutely no reason to trust us. But if maggie knew what esme was going through, she would — she would want to help. You sure there’s nothing you can tell us?

[ Piano music playing, indistinct conversations ] Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, please join me in welcoming the newlyweds, portia and curtis ashford!

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Slow music plays ]

[ Mid-tempo music plays ] Tender and soft as the wind now you’re drifting through my soul there is no one here but the two of us alone gently your words calm my heart to a softer shade of red you touch me with your whisper you make me feel so breathless


Have I told you how much I love you? Portia: Yes. [ Chuckles ]

By your heart have I told you how excited I am to start our lives together? Yes, baby, you have.

[ Chuckles ] Okay.

[ Chuckles ] Am I doing too much? You want me to stop? Never.

I’m breathless I’ve never seen my mom so happy. Well. Those vows. Maybe true love does exist. Yeah. Maybe it does. Everything looks gorgeous, especially the co-owner of the venue. How you holding up? I’m okay. Yeah? Yeah, I’m just, you know — I’m thinking about willow and imagining dancing at her wedding. There still might be a chance of that, so we can’t lose hope. Yeah. Somebody pinch me.

I’m breathless that seals it. I’m awake. I’ve lived long enough to see my son get married.

[ Chuckles ] Uncle curtis looks like he’s on cloud nine. Yeah, and my sister looks stunned. Molly: I know. It’s like she can’t believe the wedding actually happened. Oh. It happened. Those two are destined for a lifetime of bliss. Oh. Thank you. You’re welcome. Watching them, it seems so simple, doesn’t it? Maybe it is. Maybe people just… tend to overcomplicate things. “People”? Yeah. People. To life getting simpler one day. I will definitely cheers to that.

[ Cheers and applause ] Sir, I believe there’s a tradition to uphold. Indeed there is. And I would love to dance with my little girl. I would love it, too, daddy.

[ Both laugh ] Man: How about a dance?

[ Applause ] We love you!

[ Laughter ] It looks like they’re doing the daughter/daddy thing. Should we show ’em what we got? Lead the way.

You know I love you drew: Alright. Looks like we’ve got a father/daughter duo on the dance floor. Everybody, a round of applause for the bride, her father, sterling, as well as the daughter of the bride and her father, marcus. Beautiful.

[ Applause ]

This is true you’re actually making yourself sick over this. It’s just something I take for my blood pressure. Don’t worry. My cardiologist assured me that I’ll outlive all y’all. Hmph. You’d better. ‘Cause in case you didn’t know it, you are indispensable. Cemetery’s full of indispensable people. Let’s talk about something else. Okay. Like what? Oh, have you forgotten what day it is? Enough about curtis’ love life. What’s going on with yours? All you have to do is stay in that chair, look as vacant as the bates motel, and I’ll have you and our daughter out of here and on our way to our new life before the guards even have a chance to realize we’re gone. Ohh. I get misty-eyed just… thinking about it. After all this time, together again — a real, all-american family. It sounds promising. It’s more than promising. It’s a sure thing! Except you’re not accounting for one potential glitch. No glitch. This plan is glitch-free. What if esme refuses to come with us? I mean no offense, but as you pointed out, I’ve never laid eyes on you until tonight. How do I know you’re not the reason that poor girl’s in trouble? You know what? You don’T. Yeah. Unfortunately, you just have to trust us. Maggie fitzgerald was the closest thing that esme had to a friend, and maybe she could tell us something about her family, if she had a mother or a father. Basically, people who would do anything for her. Anything. And we mean anything. I wish I could help you. I truly do. Marjorie could name all of the spice girls faster than lightning. Mel b, mel c, victoria, emma, and geri. That’s impressive. Wow. But I never heard her mention an esme prince.

Always in my heart do you mind if I cut in? Well, now that you’re officially the stepfather, I think it’s only fair. Thanks for the dance. Thank you.

I will stand by you precious cargo. Don’t I know. You look lovely. Thank you.

Turn me away from you so how do you feel? Ooh. Let’s see. Um… mostly elated and grateful, of course, for your beautiful mother… and for absolutely everyone here.

I’ll be by your side but a large piece of that is reserved for you.

Day or night, I’ll comfort you portia. Honey, what’s wrong?


Nothing’s wrong, daddy. Are you sure? I’m just — I’m just getting emotional. That’s all. Okay. The happiest day of your life can do that.

[ Both chuckle ] You know what? We used to be good at at. What? Dancing? Yeah, remember when I used to spin you around at the tan-o and…? Yes, I do. Let’s give it another shot. I know — look, I know it’s hard to have fun with what’s going on with willow and michael and everything. But we got to live life… or what’s the point?

[ Chuckles ] You guys don’t have to babysit me. Go. Dance. Have fun. You might consider taking your own advice. The dance floor is calling. I’m more of an innocent bystander myself than a dancer, so… what he said. Suit yourselves.

[ Glasses clink ] What are you waiting for? Look, I still don’t think you’re good enough for trina.

[ Chuckles ] But… it’s up for her to decide, not me. Just like it’s not up to you to decide who I spend my time with. Got it? Got it. Thank you.

[ Clears throat ] Hey. Hey. Do you have one more in you? Dance, I mean. With you? Yeah, I don’t see anyone else here.

[ Chuckles ] I just — I just thought we wouldn’t pretend to be friends in public anymore. Ohh. I was never pretending. Please tell me you’re not thinking of playing matchmaker. Ohh. Heaven forbid. Look at the mess I made of curtis’ love like. Eh, you’re not to blame for what happened to our marriage. Well, I certainly didn’t help. Then after getting all aflutter about his relationship with portia… eh, she’s good people, stella.

[ Scoffs ] She is! If only portia had been upfront from the start, they could have found out for sure if curtis is or isn’t trina’s father. Yeah, now it’s too late — not to find out, of course, but for it to come out with minimal damage. I see what you’re doing. We were talking about your love life. No, no.

You were talking about it. Message received. I can’t meddle in curtis’ business. I will not be meddling in yours. Well, it’s like the good book says. Take therefore no thought for the morrow, for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself.” “Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.” Matthew 6:34. That matthew. He really knew what was up.

[ Chuckles ] He most certainly did. I hate that stella’s missing this. Yeah. Your stepdad seemed pretty bummed about it, too. Wow. That’s so weird to say out loud. Hm? My stepdad. Oh. Curtis is hiding it well, but… I know it’s killing him that stella isn’t here. I know that look. What are you thinking? I’m thinking that it’s wrong that stella’s sitting in her hotel room. Sick or not, she needs to be at this wedding. I’ve been earning esme’s trust ever since she was brought here. Poor thing. She has no one else she can count on. Especially that supposed baby daddy of hers. All he ever did was dump a bunch of papers in her lap and tell her to sign away all her rights. Give me five minutes with that “prince,” and I swear I’ll eviscerate him. Spoken like a true and loving father. For now, just be patient. Let mama take care of everything. And once we’re on the other side of those walls, no one will ever hurt our baby girl again. Well, uh, get out of your hair. Thank you for the beer. Thank you for the generous tip. Yeah, we’ll be staying at mrs. Bletchly’s b&b, so if you can think of anything about maggie that could help us locate her, it’d be fantastic. I’ll make sure to reach out. And in the meantime, you’re welcome here any time. Thank you. Thank you. Have a good night. You, as well.

[ Door opens ] So, uh, what do you think? Same as you. She’s lying through her teeth.


Was a little too friendly, don’t you think? And then she contradicted her, too. She said she didn’t know anything about trivia, and then… and then she rattles off all the names of the spice girls without missing a beat? Yeah. I’m sorry, but that woman knows a lot more than what she’s saying, and it’s not just about trivia. Okay. So, uh… let’s say — what if she was lying? She was. Okay. So what’s the next obvious question? Why? Oh. Esme. I warned you not to go and look up your father. What have you gotten yourself into now? So, you’re on board? I have a choice? Not so much. Once the stars are aligned and esme is with us, we’ll make our escape. It’ll all happen so fast, you won’t even have time to object. Still, no plan is foolproof. So, what if we happen to encounter an unforeseen complication? Then you’ll be the solution. Happy valentine’s day.

[ Chuckles ] Let me throw in just one little wrinkle to the itinerary. I got to hear it first. I just need to make one stop before we take off. I don’t know. What — what more can I say about my friend curtis? Uh, probably a lot. Oh, wow. A lot. That’s a lot of pressure, huh? Marshall: That’s my son. Yeah. How about this? How about — the quality that stands out the most to me when I think of you, when I think of this man — and laura touched on this a little bit during the ceremony — is loyalty. This man right here, he would lay down his life for those that he cares about. And I want you to know that I consider myself very, very lucky to be among them. Curtis and portia… I’m so happy for you guys. I’m j– I can’t wait to see the life that you build together. You’re beautiful inside and out. We all love you, right? -Oh, yeah. -Right. -Oh, yeah. To the best of the best, everybody! Congratulations, curtis and portia!

[ Laughter ] All: To the best of the best!

[ Laughter ] Hmm. Drew! Oh, yeah. Thank you so much. That was perfect, man. We love you, brother. I love you, too, man. I meant every single word. Okay, everybody, don’t go anywhere… ’cause it is the maid of honor’s turn now. Right? -Trina? -Uh-oh. Trina robinson, show yourself. Man: We’re in trouble now. Maybe she’s fixing up her makeup. Where is trina? I know she was excited to give the toast. Where could she be?

[ Knock on door ]

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